Jan loved her job. Sure, no job is perfect, but she really, really liked this one.
Jan ran Division 48 at a large corporation. She had a lot of people that depended on her doing her job right. And not everyone in the division liked how she did her job. But most did. And the Division was doing a lot better than many of the other divisions in the company. Jan was satisfied that she was doing a good job.
That morning, like many mornings, she noticed some strange people on the floor. Like every other morning, Jan had parked in the garage, walked to the employee entrance, swiped her badge, and entered the building. And, again this morning, she noticed that there were people wandering around the building who didn’t have a company badge.
She discovered that, while the door she entered every day was working, not every door to the building worked properly. Not that the doors wouldn’t open or allow people to entered with a badge swipe. No, the problem was that the doors would open without a badge swipe. And people from the company next door would walk into the building at will. And people from other companies could just walk in at will. And people who wandered the street would just walk in at will.
There was a desk at the main company entrance — a public area — where other people could enter the building and wait in line at the security desk. There were also security doors required a badge swipe on each floor of the building adjacent to a public area. Not every division was adjacent to a public area, but many were. Including Jan’s.
Jan sat at her desk, wondering how to handle the situation, as she had done for many days. This morning, though, Jan reached a decision. She opened Outlook and scheduled a meeting.
The meeting went well. Not everyone agreed with the decision. But Jan had decided that someone from her division would be stationed at the security door, checking anyone who wasn’t from the company, ensuring that visitors had a visitor’s pass.
Jan sent the memo around, copying the other 49 divisions, plus corporate headquarters, about the policies that were being implemented at the security door between Division 48 and the public area.
Minutes later, the phone rang. It was Eric. He oversaw the security for the company. And he wasn’t happy.
Jan explained that security was a problem on the floor, and that Corporate Security wasn’t doing its job. Eric said that his group was doing just fine thank you very much. His people had more important things to do than stand by the door outside Division 48.
“Like what?” Jan asked.
“Have you seen how many people are putting plastic in the paper recycle bin?” Eric responded. “It’s a full time job keeping people from mixing paper and plastic. We don’t have time to fix the security doors and man the floors looking for people without badges.”
Jan sighed. “That’s crazy, Eric. We have serious security issues at the company, and if you won’t or can’t do your job, my division will do it where we can.”
“We’ll see about that,” Eric said. And the call ended.
Susan concluded her meeting with Eric and Jan. She told Jan that people in her division could do some of the duties outlined in her memo. But some of the items crossed the line because they fell into Eric’s area of responsibility.
Jan would comply. Susan didn’t run the company, but her ruling would stand for now. Jan would appeal.
She just hoped the company would stay solvent until the security doors and processes were fixed.
The policies of the government over the last thirty to forty have been nothing short of asinine and totally reprehensible and with Democrats in charge, you can add “planned” to the list of adjectives. The American people share some of the blame for ignoring this, the media shares even more blame for intentionally ignoring it. Even Ronald Reagan shares some of the blame. Any nation that refuses to protect its own borders cannot claim to be a sovereign nation for long!
Jan never should have copied the other people on that memo. It pissed off Eric and clogged the e-mail system. Nex time, she will just install a steel door.
Basil and Marko and Matt, you guys are great. When Reagan passed his reforms the agreement was that the illegals would be given amnesty in turn for the flow over the border stopping. Mexico broke it’s word. Time for a consequence.
Bravo Basil.. Well done..
Of course there are lots of people running around without badges. They’re called CONTRACTORS. The company brings them in to keep from hiring more employees.
See your metaphor holds even better than you thought
[Thanks. But contractors do have special badges that identify them as contractors. They’re green. – B.]
Wonderful. But I think you forgot the part about how the random people that were walking in were taking advantage of the free snack bar, exercise room, and childcare provided by the company; therein causing backup and inefficiency that forces the company to spend more and more money to keep those systems up and running.
This story reminds me of a manager I once had. I would turn in requirement documents; however, I was sure he wasn’t reading them. Ultimately, I decided to start stapling opposite corners of each document. He never complained, and because he was a wisenheimer, I know he would have complained if he had actually attempted to open one.
Jan should send her briefs, I mean, umhh, her memos, to Eric with all four corners stapled.
Either that, or she could do the other thing I would do to test who was actually reading the documents. Deep into the report, I would insert a paragraph about aliens invading the office. The joke would be on Eric when everyone laughed but him.
Well done, Basil.
Pingback: BasilsBlog.net
Even when Jan told Eric that some of the people wandering in through the doors might be psychopathic killers, escaped from an institution in another town, Eric refused to do anything.
Very good, but in addition to Rubeus’s additions, you left out the part about the company having to partition off part of the building near the door because of the violence caused by the people who didn’t belong there to begin with.
O. M. F. G…
That was so full of awesome and win that I suspect it may soon collapse of its own weight of awesome and win and become a black hole of awinsome.