This is a true story. And as I lived it, I came to realize that it’s a good example of just how our country got into this financial mess.
It’s my own mini, but true, version of Mr. Blandings Builds His Dream House
Turns out the paint didn’t go on the walls. It went on the base paint. That was around $20-something a gallon. So in order to cover the walls, it was actually $60-something a gallon.
After the walls were done, the floor didn’t match. Because they were a blue theme, those cheap floor tiles had to go. Wife wanted wood floors. So, that’s what we got. I lost count of how much the wood, stain, polyurethane, and all such cost. But it did look good.
But now the vanity top didn’t match. It was blue. So, she picked out a new one. A white marble top with a molded sink. A little over $200. And it looked really good.
That meant we needed to change the faucet. The old one didn’t look good with it. Really, it didn’t.
So, she found one. It’s oil-rubbed bronze, or Venetian bronze, or Tuscan bronze, or some sort of bronze or something. And the spout looked like an old-style hand pump spout. And it was a little under $200. But it looked really good.
Of course, that meant that the drawer handles, door handles, and hinges on the vanity cabinet didn’t match. So we had to find new ones in oil-rubbed bronze, buy those, and replace the old ones. The hinges were hard to find. I had to order them from a place in Spokane, Washington. Which jacked the price of the 4 hinges up from under $4 to about $20.
Oh, and the towel rack needed to be replaced so it would match ($43). And the hand towel rack ($21). And the toilet paper holder ($21). And the bath robe hooks ($25).
And the door stop. And the door handle. And the door hinges. And the handle and hinges on the bathroom closet door as well. That all totaled around $80.
And the light fixture didn’t match. But a new one that did ran $99.
Oh, and the shower curtain rod. Needed one that matched. It was $50 for one that was the right style and color.
Remember the new white marble sink? Now the toilet didn’t match. So, we had to replace it. That was around $240 for a chair-height, elongated, dual-flush white toilet.
Then, of course, we had to get new bath rugs and accessories — fuzzy mat outside the tube, fuzzy mat in front of the vanity, the little fuzzy thing that goes around the toilet base, and a fuzzy toilet seat cover — and towels and such. Which together totaled a little under $200.
If you’ve been adding all this up as we’ve gone along, you’ll realize that we passed the $1,000 mark some time ago. And that’s only because we did the work ourselves. Well, us and one of the sons-in-law.
What we ended up with was a lot of work and a lot of money spent. But it all matches the shower curtain.
The shower curtain? Yes, the shower curtain she bought on sale for $10 from the K-Mart a while back. We did all that painting and replacing stuff so the bathroom would match a $10 shower curtain.
And that’s how the country ends up spending too much money on stuff.
Of course, now you understand how one thing leads to another, and that good intentions can end up with unexpected consequences and unexpected expenses.
The difference, though, is that we didn’t decide to begin a series of things that cost way too much money and have you pay for it. We paid for it ourselves. So, it’s not a financial impact on you. And we aren’t passing the debt along to your grandchildren.
The government, who has even less sense than we do, ends up spending 130 times as much as it should on stuff — but they make you pay for it.
It makes you want to beat a politician with a stick.
I don’t have a stick. But now I got a spare shower curtain rod. It ought to do the trick.
Your ideas are antiquated, Basil. They may have worked in the 1700s. They do not work today.
I’m glad to hear you didn’t replace the bath tub. That can be a real headache. But of course, if you change shower curtains, you’ll have to remodel all over again… Expectedly!
Good Golly Basil! Have been there. Laughted so hard have to have my wife read it too. Just think of all the money you saved.
Jimmy, Marko is it safe to say we don’t have a life if we’re stalking IMAO at this time of the night?
Well, not tonight, Ed. I’ve been rained-in here today and have been in web-reading hyperdrive while listening to my favorite classical music. Besides it’s only about 9:00 p.m. here. The night is young. Anything can happen! (What’s that weird noise?…)
Did you also get the special towels no one is supposed to use?
Basil, does that make you the Cary Grant character? I’ve always loved that movie, and I think this 2 minute scene sums up the difference between how men and women approach decorating.
Hey, look at it this way, you’ve added value to your home. Probably had at least one amusing mishap your family can laugh about along the way. Best of all, as you said, you’re not spending my money, it’s pretty rare when people don’t spend my money these days.
There’s a reason there are so many ‘home improvement’ chain stores making a profit.
I find that so many simple plumbing jobs end up with several hardware store trips.
I wonder if the cave paintings at Lascaux started as a little drawing of the family cow that didn’t match the next wall, and ‘say, a horse would look good there’, etc., etc, until the French troglodyte surrendered and wallpapered the rest of the cave..
Love is never having to say I’m sorry but things don’t have to match. And letting those fuzzy things just grow there on their own.
How come every little home improvement or small fix is minimum 3 trips to the hardware store? Who are the dumbasses that always leave out of the package the one screw or bolt that is mandatory for the completion of the assembly. And why is it always a custom designed bolt or screw? I have probably $6,000 in tools and carpentry equipment but when I must do something to my house, I never have the correct tool and must buy it! What’s up with that?
If the government had done the job, nothing would have matched, and you’d have seven cases of those fancy faucets for no apparent reason.
And each faucet would have cost a little under 2 grand.
Basil: Get your spycam out of my bathroom. And the faucet and fixtures are “antiqued” bronze!
But on the bright side…You didn’t have to install a tiled drop-in-tub…that nobody uses!!! Looks great though.
Basil, what happened to you is known as marriage. I just yesterday celebrated fifty-nine years without it. I would have bought a shower curtain and paint to match the tile, or, rather, I would have if I actually cared about colors matching in my bathroom.
Not only would nothing have matched, SOB, but the hot and cold sink plumbing would be reversed (and drip constantly) and the miswired light switch and GFI would turn on the ceiling fan and vice versa while zapping you with a nice dose of 120VAC. Plus, as a bonus, the toilet seat would break and your a$$ would be in the drink, ready to flush.
I explained to my kids the other day how the government got into this mess using this comparison and asking what they thought was the best scenario (they are under 10 yrs old):
Our family has just enough money to buy either nutritious food to eat or some new video games. We buy the food.
The government has just enough money to buy either nutritious food to eat or some new video games. They buy a new game system, 25 copies each of the top 100 games, a new sound system, a new sofa and 45 cases of Cracker Jacks. Then sends us the bill.
Ah, but do you have a Zuz-Zuz Water Softener?
@Jimmy, Well, at $15,000 a piece for a government toilet seat, you can’t just go replacing them every single time they break.
Basil, the only fault in your analogy was the missing $25 million feasibilty study followed by another $30 million implimentation study, along with enviromental statements.
Except Obama thinks he can, SOB – with YOUR money!