Nancy Pelosi’s looking better these days… They say if you want to look thin hang out with fat people. I guess it is also true that if you don’t want to look ancient, leathery, and power mad, hang out with Harry Reid.
Amazing what a little exercise and day at the spa can do. What, you mean Congresswoman Pelosi? No, she’s still a hag. I thought you meant Nancy Pelosi of Jackson Mississippi. Nice lady. Make me cookies.
“Nancy Pelosi’s looking better these days”
“Harry Reid is an honest and honorable man”
“Joe Biden lends gravitas to this administration”
“Barack Obama may be one of the greatest Presidents Ever”
~ Quotes from the book “1001 Things Honest People Cannot Say With a Straight Face”
NOTE: This is a companion to last year’s best seller “Lies, Damn Lies, and Democratic Talking Points”
…since she insists on standing next to Helen Thomas.
…thanks to XTREME Beer Goggles™ by Ronco!
…for me to P**P on!
…since she had the skewers removed.
…since spending quality time with Harry and his boys.
…she’s looking forward to retirement.
Nancy Pelosi’s looking better these days… I have to give to Obama on this one, Senate Burkas were a great idea.
Nancy Pelosi’s looking better these days… She must be using a new varnish.
…she finally molted.
Nancy Pelosi’s looking better these days… They say if you want to look thin hang out with fat people. I guess it is also true that if you don’t want to look ancient, leathery, and power mad, hang out with Harry Reid.
She discover her assistant was giving her pigs blood and now she’s back to human blood.
“Nancy Pelosi’s looking better these days”; Bill thought to himself as he gazed down at his sleeping wife, Hillary.
Its true what they say, 95 is the new 93.
Nancy Pelosi’s looking better these days… though her belly button has been pulled up to her neck
Nancy Pelosi’s looking better these days… “surprised” is the new hot look for fall fashion
Nancy Pelosi’s looking better these days… if by “better” you mean “less mendacious” than Harry Reid
…now that I’ve gouged out both eyeballs…
She went to the spa for a mud pack facial and they forgot to wash it off.
Nancy Pelosi’s looking better these days… oh wait, where are my glasses again?
at least that’s what dingy harry’s “credible source” told me.
Nancy Pelosi’s looking better these days…that bucket really suits her.
…if the option of the other cub scout pup-tent has to be shared with Harry Reid. But you will still pray for a grizzly bear to attack.
…not!
… since I don’t have to see her as much.
Amazing what a little exercise and day at the spa can do. What, you mean Congresswoman Pelosi? No, she’s still a hag. I thought you meant Nancy Pelosi of Jackson Mississippi. Nice lady. Make me cookies.
That spa day with the crypt keeper did wonders.
Nancy Pelosi’s looking better these days, proof that purfume and lipstick can indeed help a pig.
“Nancy Pelosi’s looking better these days, or so Google tells me,” said Harry Reid, pederast.
Nancy Pelosi’s looking better these days… Is it L’Oreal? Maybe it’s Maybelline? Oh, it’s Scorched Earth…
“Nancy Pelosi’s looking better these days is the last thing I remember saying before the bartender cut me off and called me a cab.”
Did I say looking? I meant *SEEING* better. Her new eyeglass prescription allows her to finally read what is in Obamacare.
It would be almost impossible for her to look WORSE…
…said nobody, ever.
…but has yet to seek treatment for her chronic cranial-rectal hyperextention syndrome.
… thanks to the skill of her new undertaker she hired to do her makeup.
…as the portrait in her attic grows more decrepit.
…because, as I heard from a source, she took another bath in Virgin’s blood.
…they say the tension from the most recent lift was a perfect pitch ‘G’ note.
…but you have to pass her to see it.
… but somebody else made that happen.
…wait, where are my glasses?
…since that molybdenum grease is really working out.
But I’ve been drinking more
…But it’s been a bad week to stop sniffing glue.
Because 4 months without a job and I’m already considering cannibalism…
….over her shoulder at the right wing hordes coming to take her away ha-haa!, coming to take her away…
….since she went shopping the other day and the alert checkout clerk put the bag over her head.
BEST FILL IN THE QUOTES EVER! I nominate High Praise for everybody.
SI – well, I don’t hand out High Praise! to just anyone. It’s not some cheap, meaningless award like a Nobel Peace Prize.
I do, however, concur that there’s an overabundance of awesome in the punch lines for this one.
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“Nancy Pelosi’s looking better these days”
“Harry Reid is an honest and honorable man”
“Joe Biden lends gravitas to this administration”
“Barack Obama may be one of the greatest Presidents Ever”
~ Quotes from the book “1001 Things Honest People Cannot Say With a Straight Face”
NOTE: This is a companion to last year’s best seller “Lies, Damn Lies, and Democratic Talking Points”
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…… since she was embalmed.
Nancy Pelosi’s looking better these days…hey, can someone help me out of this rabbit hole.