Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.
A former Obama speech writer just wrote…
Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.
A former Obama speech writer just wrote…
… something without Spin, and it damn near killed him.
A former Obama speech writer just wrote…
not even a boat load of Anonymiss cookies can cure the pain of this defeat.
…a letter to Iran it began, Dear Ayatollah of Rock and Rollah.
A former Obama speech writer just wrote…
“Mama don’t let your babies grow up to be Obama Speech writers…”
A former Obama speech writer just wrote…
“It was a dark and stormy night…”
A former Obama speech writer just wrote…
“If we had only nuked the moon things would have turned out differently!”
A former Obama speech writer just wrote…
“We would have gotten away with it, if it wasn’t for those meddlesome kids!”
…off any hope of gainful employment, in that Obama’s speeches demonstrate no ability to communicate anything, and no connection to reality.
…a new book of Cowboy Poetry, because, thank God, there are still Federal dollars supporting it.
… his resignation.
…A new theme song for the DNC http://youtu.be/bXysRO11Xi8
…that Wasserman-Shultz shall henceforth be known as “Debbie Downer”
A former Obama speech writer just wrote…
You made me love you
I didn’t want to do it, I didn’t want to do it
You made me love you
And all the time you knew it
I guess you always knew it.
You made me happy sometimes, you made me glad
But there were times, Dear, you made me feel so bad
You made me sigh for, I didn’t want to tell you
I didn’t want to tell you
I want some love that’s true, yes I do, deed I do, you know I do
Give me, give me, give me what I cry for
You know you got the brand of kisses that I’d die for
You know you made me love you
ba dee ba dee ba dee That’s all folks.
When in danger
or in doubt
run in circles
scream and shout.
I knew you were trouble
Ya dee buckety, ram ding doo, Ni Ni Ni, Yaooool
When things go wrong as they usually will,
When your daily road seems all uphill.
When funds are low,
And debts are high.
When you try to smile,
But can only cry.
When you really feel,
you’d like to quit.
Don’t run to me, I DON’T GIVE A SH*T!
“Prepare three envelopes.”
@1 – Steve H Do you set a Straight Line of the Day alarm? 🙂
…”The President’s a LA LOSER!”
…”My pen is out of ink and my phone battery is dead.”
…”I think I’ll write for Hillary now. Mwahahahahaha!”
…all of my writings were for TOTUS. Not my fault that POTUS couldn’t read.
…non-fiction, there’s a first time for everything.
not a great reference…He only had the one speech. http://abcnews.go.com/blogs/politics/2008/03/clinton-reduces/
…a suicide note.
…an autobiography where she details what Lena Dunham did to her once during a sleepover.
…to MSNBC begging for a job.
His mommy asking if he could move back.
…”mene mene tekel upharsin”, with a finger…
See, I told you it was Bush’s fault.
A former Obama speech writer just wrote…
… on his resume “When it comes to speeches, I put the K in Kwality.”
“I got paid $1 per lie. I made over $4 million last year, working part time.”
…another document filled with self-serving puffery and carefully crafted denials – a resume…
…”That’s it, I’m outta here!”
…”I didn’t write anything. The teleprompter has a mind of its own!”
… a stern warning to his inner hippie, being too timid to punch it.
… a question to Lactose, asking who leaked word-for-word transcripts of what went on the Oval Office for his “Always Sunny” series.
… a few checks to his sub-contractors at ABC, CBS, NBC, . . .
… “As I’ve said before” for the one hundred trillionth time — that’s gotta be a world’s record.
A former Obama speech writer just wrote… with invisible ink! You can’t see hot air
the greatest recipe for raisin walnut cookies ever! All hail liberal raisin walnut cookies!!
That’s nuts, Nucking Futs! You never mix raisins with walnuts!
…the same things he always used to write for Obama: “uhh…let me be clear…ahh…no one is angrier than me…umm…Cousin Pookie…err…obstructionists…uhh…”
… “Geez, I’m gad he got that ugly facial mole removed.” Which is why he’s a former speechwriter.
… a backwards political sitcom, “Taxy”: Obama plays Damme DeVeto,. Justice Scalia is Judge Harsh, Sandra Fluke is Marilu Hummer, . . .
… and wrote and wrote and wrote. Day in and day out; but Barack never looked at any of it, because he thought his words were brighter.
Welcome to the real world, Skippy.
@41: When I was a kid, we had a cat named Pookie. All she did was eat and lay on the radiator all day to the point she lost most of her fur.
…yeah Barack has a pen but rumor has it he has no lead in his pencil. Phone home Obama, Earth doesn’t want you any more.
…all of America’s communists know we have two years left to rule but there are 50 ways to love your leaver…Just play a lot of golf hack. Stab em in the back Jack. Let em flood the borders Lee. Ebola across the sea Snee. They’ll never recover from Thee.
…an even easier to read and follow version of Voting For Dummies, The Dead and Other Democrats.
…a love letter to his cat. Only his cat is surprised by this.
…a top ten list of Obama’s accomplishments, which should give new meaning to the term bathroom humor.
A former Obama speech writer just wrote…
… a compilation of O’s speeches entitled 1984: A “How-To” Guide for Tinpot Dictators
… apparently nothing that was ever clear the first time.
… “Give the President a ‘harrumph’ !”
… “redrum” on the TelePrompTer 100 times.
… a cookbook with FLOTUS, Arugula Cookies and Other Socialist School Lunch Goodies
… something that made absolute, total sense. April Fool’s!
P.S. to our beloved Anonymiss: my entries will always be late (or nearly so) as they originate from the far side of the freakin’ globe. Thanks for letting me slide in under the wire!
…you didn’t vote that.
…you don’t think the war on women’s a real thing? you’re just a woman with a small brain. it’s science(!)…
…apparently I should’ve reminded you idiots on november 3rd that I fake killed bin laden.
…this will be the most transparent administration in history. (come on barry. do you even read this $h!t before it gets loaded into the prompter?)
{Expletive Defeated}
Go and see who won cookies here: http://www.nukingpolitics.com/2014/11/nuke-punchline-i-wish-hed-get-on-with-3.html
And smile 🙂
Oh, and I left you a sort of guessing game…
Go and give it your best shot…
@50 – Anonymiss – Thank you…
Link has been posted