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July 10, 2003
Posse Power!
Whatever happened to the posse? Used to be whenever something went wrong, a group of angry people with guns would get together and take care of it. Nowadays, it always seems the answer is to sit on one's lazy ass and either ignore it or call the police. Well, I'm tired of that; I think it's time to bring back the posse. Think of all the advantages to the posse: * It's an outdoor activity: Nothing like getting fresh air when walking around angry with guns. * It involves exercise: Exercise comes in the form of walking… and sometimes punching and kicking. *It involves brainwork: You have to figure out who the perpetrator is to a 55% degree of certainty before you rough him up, and that takes detective work. * It helps you meet people in your community: Either from them joining the posse or you roughing them up. * It's an excuse to openly carry guns: Guns are cool. A posse to me sounds like the American way: people taking things into their own hands. Well, next homeowner's association meeting, I'm going to bring up the idea of the posse committee, which I will head. Something goes wrong in our neighborhood, people come talk to me and I'll get together a group of considered citizens to handle it. Chair missing from the cabana? When we find out who took it, he'll wish he had never been born. Someone trample through my neighbors prized begonias? One we take out his kneecaps, he won't be trampling through anything no more. Something knock over a trashcan at night. Probably raccoons, but it could be ninjas. Better get the posse together. I think I'll take my shotgun, my .45, and my samurai sword (in case it is ninjas), and then I get a big group armed to the teeth and start questioning people. "What do you know, kid?" "I just learned my ABC's today, mister." I pick the kid up by his collar. "Don't get wise with me! What do you know about that trashcan getting knocked over last night?" "You're a mean and scary man!" I squint my eyes. "You just think I'm mean and scary now." Man, that sounds so cool. And think of how great a posse will be in places where there is actual crime. Maybe I could write a book on posse etiquette to help other people start their own posse, putting forth rules on how to alternate who gets to do the roughing up so that no one feels left out (the main part of a posse is making friends). Why hasn't anyone brought up this idea before? Oh yeah, because only I am super-smart enough to have thought of it. Hey, I hear Saddam is still on the loose and worth 25 million dollars. Anyone interested in getting a posse together and go finding him? 23 Responses To "Posse Power!"
Brilliant! Are there gender requirements for a posse? I don't remember seeing or reading anything about women being involved. You forgot to mention how the posse should dress. I believe this is highly important - almost ranking as crucial as the visible guns - in the public perception of the posse's effectiveness. hln #3 - Posted by: hln on July 10, 2003 09:03 AMWe'll raise up our glasses against evil forces Posse indeed! While a posse is an agreeable form of sporting vigilantism, since when did IMAO need the "steenkin' bahdges" that comes with deputization into a posse? Sounds like with the passing of another year (happy belated blogoversary, I'd link to your site but I'm merely a commenter, not a blogger) the IMAO's notorious hair-trigger independence has aged into a calmer, kinder and gentler committe chairmanship. Why go all squishy soft now, Frank? #5 - Posted by: Carolinian on July 10, 2003 09:27 AMOther cool things about posses: #7 - Posted by: Mike on July 10, 2003 10:07 AM Bozeman, MT. East of the fairgrounds, the Sheriff's Posse maintains a building filled with posse stuff. Yes, we still have posses in MT. You'd fit in real good over here Frank, and it's a great place to work on your manifesto. #8 - Posted by: ken on July 10, 2003 10:22 AM Most western counties still have a Sheriff's Posse, to this day. It's mostly ceremonial (hint, in the parade always march in FRONT of the horses)but, in my county, it gets called out fairly frequently, mostly looking for missing children. We have a big lake and a lot of rivers and creeks. I think there was a Simpson's episode about this. Worked out pretty well for springfield. http://www.snpp.com/episodes/1F09.html #10 - Posted by: sleepdeficit on July 10, 2003 02:46 PM"So the man who was looking for you this whole time was the one who finally caught you." "How ironic." #11 - Posted by: Frank J. on July 10, 2003 03:12 PMBrian - As I was reading this, I was actually listening to that song. Nice bit of serendipity for the day, thanks. #12 - Posted by: heidi on July 10, 2003 03:15 PMThere have been posses in this neighborhood. Hey, the guy next door with the gang tattoos moved away because he said this neighborhood was too rough. #13 - Posted by: Meg on July 10, 2003 08:56 PMHey Frank how about getting jaunty little berets and dumbass pins to wear. You could be like Curtis Sliwa's posse (except with guns.)
I'll go hunt Saddam with you! But I get to ride standing up in the back of the "Rat Patrol" jeep and shoot the 50-calber machine gun. Otherwise, it's no deal. #15 - Posted by: Acidman on July 11, 2003 09:43 AMWe still have real posses here in Texas. Here is the Travis County Posse webpage: Watch out though -- the queers have been appropriating the word, and now there are a bunch of gay cowboys running around making posse pages. I just feel sorry for the horses. #16 - Posted by: Phelps on July 11, 2003 11:49 AMWell, there won't be ANY posses or ANY guns if the gun-control crowd on both left and right have their way.
Sorry, folks - the links I posted don't work! Here here's the posting again [for context] with the links re-coded: "Well, there won't be ANY posses or ANY guns if the gun-control crowd on both left and right have their way. Left AND right? Yep! And the US political elite is STILL committed to its obligations to disarm Americans, and then the country, as expressed in STATE DEPARTMENT DOCUMENT 7277 [see http://www.survivaliskills.com/STAT7277.HTM. If you want to get REALLY worried, see the 'OPERATION GARDEN PLOT' page at see http://www.survivaliskills.com/GDNPLOT.HTM. Gun control is still a real issue for both parties, and for their elite backers! There's an excellent selection of other 'New World Order Intelligence Update' articles on topics connected with this archived at http://www.rarehistorybooks.com/NWOLINKS.HTM. Well worth reading!" There is an old saying I heard about how "A posse(mob) is only as smart as its dumbest member." I have since discovered this is only true with Liberal War Protesters.... #19 - Posted by: LokiDoki on July 15, 2003 10:04 PMHere in Suffolk County, NY we use to have special deputy sheriff's until 2002, they were like a posse, mostly looking for missing kids, etc. We also have 2,800 County Police officers and 600 municipal cops in addition to about 350 regular deputy sheriff's. Thats why we got rid of them, besides all they did was look for missing kids and people with Alzheimers and direct traffic at major events. #20 - Posted by: Chris on April 7, 2004 05:31 PMi agree with these citizens who want to restore order and humanity to a country that rewards the inept, and believes in reverse racism. i want to join the cause. anyone out there please send me info., how to join the cause, etc., sincerely, an american, and ex-vet. that is not happpy, craighubbell126@yahoo.com. p.s., please respond, i can't sit still any longer. #21 - Posted by: on November 19, 2004 12:51 PMi agree with these citizens who want to restore order and humanity to a country that rewards the inept, and believes in reverse racism. i want to join the cause. anyone out there please send me info., how to join the cause, etc., sincerely, an american, and ex-vet. that is not happpy, craighubbell126@yahoo.com. p.s., please respond, i can't sit still any longer. #22 - Posted by: craig hubbell on November 19, 2004 12:52 PMi agree with these citizens who want to restore order and humanity to a country that rewards the inept, and believes in reverse racism. i want to join the cause. anyone out there please send me info., how to join the cause, etc., sincerely, an american, and ex-vet. that is not happpy, craighubbell126@yahoo.com. p.s., please respond, i can't sit still any longer. #23 - Posted by: craig hubbell on November 19, 2004 12:53 PMPost a comment
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