About IMAO

Giving money to Frank J. makes you happy!

Buy funniest book ever!

IMAO Podcasts
IMAO Merchandise and Newsletter

Cool shirts, mugs, stickers, and what-not!

About IMAO
Then conquer we must, for our cause is just, 
And this be our motto--'In God is our trust.' 
And the star-spangled banner in triumph doth wave 
O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave.

If you want to send something by snail mail, e-mail with subject "P.O. Box" to get mail information for Frank J. and SarahK.

About Frank J.

Frank J.
Cadet Happy
Laurence Simon

Popular Categories
Fred Thompson Facts
John Edwards Fabulous Facts
IMAO Condensed
Know Thy Enemy
Frank the Artist
In My World
Other Content
Ode to Violence
Brief Histories
IMAO Audio Bits

Read the Essay
Own the Shirt
Peace Gallery
Search IMAO
Web www.imao.us
"All quotes attributed to me on IMAO are made up... including this one."
-Glenn Reynolds

"Unfunny treasonous ronin!"
-Lou Tulio*

"You, sir, are a natural born killer."
-E. Harrington

"You'll never get my job! Never!!!"
-Jonah Goldberg

"In the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth. And He did despair, for in His omniscience, He did know that His creations had but three-fifths of the splendor of that which would be IMAO."
-No One of Consequence

"A blogger with a sense of humor."
-Some Woman on MSNBC
Ace of Spades HQ
The Anti-Idiotarian Rottweiler
Captain's Quarters
Classical Values
Conservative Grapevine
The Corner
The Daily Gut (with Jim Treacher!)
Dave in Texas
Eject! Eject! Eject!
Electric Venom
Hot Air
Puppy Blender
La Shawn Barber's Corner
Michelle Malkin
Protein Wisdom
Rachel Lucas
Right Wing News
Serenity's Journal
Townhall Blog

IMAO Blogroll
Bad Example
Cadet Happy
The Flying Space Monkey Chronicles
mountaineer musings
Right Wing Duck
SarahK & Cadet Happy snark TV
This Blog Is Full of Crap

Fred Thompson Links
Fred File
Blogs for Fred
Fred Thompson Facts


September 25, 2003
The Goober Debate
Posted by Frank J. at 08:32 AM | View blog reactions | Comments (31)

I was flipping around the channel saying, "Dude, there's nothing on," when I saw what I thought was this Arnold Schwarzenegger movie I had never seen before. Instead, it was the California recall debate. So I watched the whole thing, and here is a summary:

* Other than Arnold, McClintock, and Bustamante, there was also Arianna Huffington and a Green party candidate just to make things wacky.

* Gray Davis wasn't there because no one likes him.

* Arianna's job seemed to be to enrage Arnold and to stray so far off topic that the other candidates would forget what the original question was. She also seemed to be trying to engage President Bush in a debate who never responded, using the excuse that he was 3,000 miles away and not running for governor.

* A big deal was made about how the candidates got the questions ahead of time, but the whole debate ended up being so chaotic that you wouldn't of known. It did everything but break down into a kung-fu fight, which, as the other candidates realized, would have just benefited Arnold.

* Early on, Arnold quipped to the Green Party candidate, "You make me laugh; I'll kill you last." Soon after, though, he crushed the Green Party candidate’s head with his two massive hands. Many are now saying this shows that Arnold will not keep his campaign promises, but his defenders said he was at least forthright about this reversal in position, as, just before crushing him, he told the Green Party candidate, "You know when I told you I would kill you last? I lied."

* Arianna eventually bothered Arnold so much that he yelled, "Hasta la vista, baby!" and then blew her up with a rocket launcher. Arianna Huffington died as she lived: extremely off topic.

* Bustamante, who referred to illegal aliens as "indigenous", eventually broke down from the attacks and pulled out a knife and yelled, "I'm going to cut you gringos!" Arnold then rebutted by saying, "Big mistake," and threw Bustamante through the back wall.

* The moderator was a bit annoying, making far too many jokes. Eventually, Arnold became fed up with him, shouted his famous movie line, "I kill you good now!" and snapped the moderator's neck. The debate went more smoothly afterwards.

* McClintock said some things about people leaving for Arizona and Nevada.

After the debate, Fox News had on some commentators, one for the Republicans, one for the Democrat, and a circus clown to represent the other two. The Republican said that McClintock won the debate, but Arnold probably did well enough to keep his lead over him. The Democrat said the whole thing was so silly that it probably would help Davis; otherwise Bustamante would win. The circus clown tied a balloon and then said, "Hey! Look! A pony!" which is the best one could say for the Green Party candidate and Arianna Huffington (who are dead now).

Personally, I think McClintock did the best, sounding very professional and staying out of the silly bickering. I kinda now wish Arnold would drop out and support him. Arnold could always try some other job... like maybe a doctor!

"I have good news, Mr. Johnson; the test shows that the growth is benign."

"So what does that mean, Dr. Schwarzenegger?"

"Very simply... IT'S NAUGHT A TOO-MAH!"

Heh heh. I don't care if you found that funny; it always cracks me up.

Rating: 2.3/5 (33 votes cast)

Email This | Add to del.icio.us | Digg this | StumbleUpon Toolbar Stumble It!

Buy IMAO T-Shirts

IMAO T-Shirts

The IMAO T-Shirt Babe
(winning picture) YOU BUY NEW SHIRTS NOW!!!
Yay! Books!

By Category
American Idol
Barackalypse Now
Best of IMAO 2002
Best of IMAO 2006
Bite-Sized Wisdom
Election 2008
Filthy Lies
Frank Answers
Frank Discussions
Frank on Guns
Frank Reads the Bible
Frank the Artist
Fred Thompson Facts
Friday Cat-Blogging
Fun Trivia
Hellbender Take Two
Hillary Clinton Terrible Truths
I Hate Frank
If I Were President
ignis fatuous
IMAO Condensed
IMAO Exclusives
IMAO for the Non-Deaf
IMAO Reviews
IMAO Think Tank
In My World
In My World - Fan Fiction
John Edwards Fabulous Facts
Know Thy Enemy
Michael Moore
Mitt Romney Ads
News Round-Up
Newsish Fakery
No, McCain't
Our Military
Permalink Contest
Precision Guided Humor Assignments
Ron Paul, Ron Paul, Ron Paul
Ronin Profiles
Ronin Thought of the Day
SarahK's TV stuff
Scary Evil Monkey
Simpsons Trivia
Songs & Poems
State of the Frank Report
Totally True Tidbits
WEsistance Is Facile
Why Me Laugh?
Yvonne's Ashes
By Month
December 2008
September 2008
August 2008
July 2008
June 2008
May 2008
April 2008
March 2008
February 2008
January 2008
December 2007
November 2007
October 2007
September 2007
August 2007
July 2007
June 2007
May 2007
April 2007
March 2007
February 2007
January 2007
December 2006
November 2006
October 2006
September 2006
August 2006
July 2006
June 2006
May 2006
April 2006
March 2006
February 2006
January 2006
December 2005
November 2005
October 2005
September 2005
August 2005
July 2005
June 2005
May 2005
April 2005
March 2005
February 2005
January 2005
December 2004
November 2004
October 2004
September 2004
August 2004
July 2004
June 2004
May 2004
April 2004
March 2004
February 2004
January 2004
December 2003
November 2003
October 2003
September 2003
August 2003
July 2003
June 2003
May 2003
April 2003
March 2003
February 2003
January 2003
December 2002
November 2002
October 2002
September 2002
August 2002
July 2002
March 1933