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January 29, 2004
Setting Sites on Kerry
I guess should comment some on who's looking more likely to be the Democrat's presidential nominee: John Kerry. But what's the best way to make fun of a haughty, French-looking Senator from Massachusetts who - by the way - served in Vietnam? Any ideas? I was thinking of making fun of his hair. The status quo must be preserved even if the whole world must be upheaved in the process! 28 Responses To "Setting Sites on Kerry"
You could have him drop the f-bomb in inappropriate places. Example: Kerry: When I sat down to comb my hair today, did I know that I would f***k it up so badly? I don't think anyone knew. This never happened when I was serving in Vietnam. #1 - Posted by: gaskar on January 29, 2004 07:13 AMDon't for the fact that he married into money. Mine that nugget Frank! #2 - Posted by: Evil Midnight Poster What Posts At Midnight on January 29, 2004 07:19 AMReporter: Senator Kerry, how do you keep every hair in place? Follow the ketchup!! Follow the ketchup!!! #4 - Posted by: MAJ Mike on January 29, 2004 08:20 AMFollow the ketchup!! Follow the ketchup!!! #5 - Posted by: MAJ Mike on January 29, 2004 08:21 AMIt is kind of weird how his wife kept the name of her ex-husband... #6 - Posted by: Frank J. on January 29, 2004 08:25 AMServed in Viet Nam did he? Didn't Jane Fonda go to Viet Nam... #7 - Posted by: LibertyBob on January 29, 2004 08:27 AMwhat about his mis-shapen head? Or his blood hound looking face? You could have big lines of drool hanging down from the corners of his mouth that would sway and stick to people near him. Give him terets so he Woofs. Vietnam just ain't funny to me but you'll find a way Frank. #8 - Posted by: gibsonrlz on January 29, 2004 08:44 AMDon't overlook the comic potential of his wife. According to Michelle Malkin (http://www.townhall.com/columnists/michellemalkin/mm20040128.shtml) she might be the next to have a Howeird Dean moment. Imagine John Effin' Kerry having to ask her for an advance on his allowance so that he can buy sandwiches for his staff... "But buttercup..." Hey, Former Hostage, that was cute. I can see Frank J writing your name on his "People to Hurt" list right now. #10 - Posted by: LibertyBob on January 29, 2004 09:00 AMYou've gotta use the `nam thing. He tries to play to the pro-war crowd by bragging that he served in vietnam, and to the anti-war crowd, by saying that he burned his medals. But that made him look bad to the people who support the war, so he started claiming that he had burned someone else's medals :P I miss making fun of Dean, do we really have to make fun of Kerry just cause he's likely to win? #12 - Posted by: Dan on January 29, 2004 09:01 AMLiberty, I lioke doing it this way: http://www.quibbles-n-bits.com/archives/week_2004_01_25.html#002133 #14 - Posted by: Mr. Quibbler on January 29, 2004 09:09 AMSurely we must make mention of his apparent Botox treatment. Botox and Intox, the MA senatorial tag team! #15 - Posted by: Fredrik Nyman on January 29, 2004 10:14 AMBOTOX! Botox I say. #16 - Posted by: Annie on January 29, 2004 10:54 AMWell, he DID serve in Vietnam... Yeah, I'd go with the Botox. Or that he looks like Jay Leno w/o the chin. #17 - Posted by: The Vigilante on January 29, 2004 11:04 AMThe amazing thing to me is how someone with that alleged face can marry not one but two heiresses and claim to understand the problems of the little guy. One word Frank: Lerch. #19 - Posted by: Laura Z on January 29, 2004 11:53 AMViet Nam - isn't that the quagmire that the French pulled out of just in time, leaving us to finish the job? Now if Mr. Kerry's father had pulled out in time, it'd be a different story. #20 - Posted by: Andrew on January 29, 2004 12:40 PMRe: Kerry speaking out of both sides of his mouth at (almost) the same time. Below link is to Noam Schieber, Jan 29 "The New Republic" http://www.tnr.com/etc.mhtml?pid=1261 Consider this "Notebook" item from TNR's March 25, 1991 issue, which ran under the headline "Same Senator, Same Constituent": "Thank you for contacting me to express your opposition ... to the early use of military force by the US against Iraq. I share your concerns. On January 11, I voted in favor of a resolution that would have insisted that economic sanctions be given more time to work and against a resolution giving the president the immediate authority to go to war." --letter from Senator John Kerry to Wallace Carter of Newton Centre, Massachusetts, dated January 22 [1991] "Thank you very much for contacting me to express your support for the actions of President Bush in response to the Iraqi invasion of Kuwait. From the outset of the invasion, I have strongly and unequivocally supported President Bush's response to the crisis and the policy goals he has established with our military deployment in the Persian Gulf." --Senator Kerry to Wallace Carter, January 31 [1991] #21 - Posted by: Phil Winsor on January 29, 2004 02:16 PMFrank, "Setting Sights on Kerry" As in "sight alignment, sight picture, exhale, hold, squeeze." #22 - Posted by: Former Hostage on January 29, 2004 03:01 PMphotoshop him giving a campaign speech wearing a beret and a striped t-shirt. #23 - Posted by: Dave in Texas on January 29, 2004 03:10 PMHostage, It's not a bug - it's a feature! #24 - Posted by: Frank J. on January 29, 2004 03:23 PMThe only way to work John Kerry in is as a hippie, a la Tommy Chong's privileged background from "Up in Smoke". http://tastymanatees.com/archives/000167.html #25 - Posted by: Tasty Manatees on January 29, 2004 05:24 PM"It's not a bug - it's a feature!" Oh...yeah....right! Who do you think I am...Peter Arnett. #26 - Posted by: Former Hostage on January 30, 2004 08:44 AMOverheard Hanoi-John whining: "Just because "Tessie-Catsup" doesn't trust me...Terry McAwful is also making me sign a pre-nupt agreement. #27 - Posted by: smlfry on February 20, 2004 07:00 PMdelivery or night approved. Propecia get http://www.propecia-i.com supplies Ortho-McNeil and free Pfizer 30 buy without largest AstraZeneca Bayer over The now of days largest FDA The Order variety of vitamins. Merck #28 - Posted by: Propecia on December 1, 2004 08:10 PMPost a comment
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