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June 28, 2004
Know Thy Enemy: Michael Moore
Michael Moore is fat. Oh, and he also had the number one movie over the weekend with his new propaganda piece, Fahrenheit 9/11, about how Bush is not a good president or something or other. I hope he really gets Bush on not controlling spending at home. Anyway, I had my crack research staff work overtime finding out all the facts about the fascinating piece of work known as Michael Moore. FUN FACTS ABOUT MICHAEL MOORE * He's fat. * He's ugly. * He's fat and ugly. * He corpulent... which means fat. * He compares unfavorably to a baboon’s butt in both appearance and smell. * Michael Moore has the uncanny ability to cause burst of hatred in otherwise rational people - that fat, fat, ugly, smelly man! * Michael Moore had a trouble childhood as he grew up without parents... since he ate them. * Michael Moore was raised by a family of gorillas in the zoo until they could no longer stand either his smell or personality. * Some say Michael Moore is a (poorly) shaved wookie, but wookies take offense at that. * It's a myth that Michael Moore never bathes... he just does it nacho cheese sauce. * John Candy died soon after appearing in Canadian Bacon. It is unknown how many other people Michael Moore's films have killed. * Though a millionaire, Michael Moore is often stopped on the streets by hobos who offer him hygiene advice. * Whether Michael Moore is fat and ugly because of his views or he got his views by being fat and ugly is under academic debate. * The reason Michael Moore always wears a baseball cap is to keep in his pulsating brain which is a mixture of neurons and hog fat. * Someone is making a documentary about Michael Moore, but I believe there already was one. I think it was called The Blob. * Michael Moore doubles in size every one and a half years. This is referred to as "Moore's Law." * Michael Moore's new movie, Fahrenheit 9/11, gives irrational Bush haters even more irrational reasons to hate Bush. * As for people who are rational and don't hate Bush, any attempt by Michael Moore to convert them to drooling idiots is undone by him appearing on screen causing people to shout, "Who is that fat, fat ugly man? Whatever views he has, I want the opposite!" * Michael Moore had a T.V. series, T.V. Nation, for a while which had a cool theme song... though not cool enough to distract from how fat and ugly Michael Moore is. Thus it was soon canceled. * Though he says he's a socialist, the way he makes millions by exploiting the ignorance and venom of angry lefties is extremely capitalistic. Makes me wish I were a fat, ugly, lying, sack of... * If he ever lost all his money though (probably spending it all on pork rinds) and became a hobo, how could anyone tell? * Bowling for Columbine was a film all about guns, yet someone Michael Moore never took a bullet in a shooting accident... perhaps evidence that God doesn't love us. * Then again, if Moore were to burn in hell, the fuel costs on frying that fat man would soon bankrupt the underworld, causing all the evil demons within to have to find jobs elsewhere... probably stealing them from our hardworking illegal immigrants. * Fat and ugly, that man. * The diet of the Michael Moore is globs of fat, mugs of grease, and small children. * Michael Moore is frightened by healthy vegetables, facts, and three-headed zombie monsters. If you ever encounter him, scare him away with one of those. * When Michael Moore wraps all his lies and distortions into a film he calls a "documentary," he gets lots of awards from Hollywood types, who, though not necessarily as fat and ugly, are quite stupid. * Michael Moore's smell is a natural protection, as even a rabid animal isn't crazy enough to put its mouth around something with a stench like that. * In a fight between Michael Moore and Aquaman, Michael Moore would hound Aquaman for an interview who would then hide in his Aqualair and ignore the fat, annoying man. Good for Aquaman. * Finally giving up, Michael Moore would then fry and eat many of Aquaman's fish friends. Poor Aquaman. * I once thought it would be funny to put a baseball cap on a pile of manure, get a picture of me standing next to it, and then show it saying I met Michael Moore, but I gave up the idea since I don't own a baseball cap. * Michael Moore has a bunch of lawyers to sue anyone who tells the truth about him (namely that he is fat and ugly) for libel. Bring it on, fatty! * BTW, if you would like to donate to the Frank J. legal defense fund, click on either the Amazon of PayPal link on the sidebar. * Liberals and Conservatives often get into lengthy arguments about the merits of Michael Moore's political views, but so far there has been no good rebuttal to the fact that he is a fat, ugly, unshaven, smelly man, and I suspect there never will be. 133 Responses To "Know Thy Enemy: Michael Moore"
First? #1 - Posted by: Pablo on June 28, 2004 07:26 AMMmmm... mugs of grease. #2 - Posted by: Pablo on June 28, 2004 07:28 AMBoy, M.Moore makes my blood boil(sigh). - Michael Moore is based on the character of Eric Cartman #4 - Posted by: random_proser on June 28, 2004 07:31 AMhmmm, somehow that makes sense. #5 - Posted by: Laura on June 28, 2004 07:35 AMthat was great, frank. i thought i saw a theme running through the facts, but i couldn't put my finger on it, as fat and grease are slippery little suckers. unlike michael moore, who is a slippery big sucker. #6 - Posted by: sarahk on June 28, 2004 07:52 AMFrank, why don't you take up a collection and see if we can raise enough money to send Michael Moore three items: What do you think? DNice, you seem to be forgetting that Michael Moore wouldn't use any of those items: The best way to handle such a self agrandizing thing as Moore: "Michael who?" #9 - Posted by: LibertyBob on June 28, 2004 08:55 AM--Nice job, Frank! I do think you forgot to mention something, though... or maybe you did and I just missed it... but you should have mentioned that the michael moore is quite fat and incredibly smelly and disgusting. You also forgot that Fat Bastard from Austin Powers fame was based on Michael Moore. (or was it the floater that he left?) I think you knew but didn't want to say it. As Fat Bastard wasn't as fat and smelly as Moore. The diet of the Michael Moore is globs of fat, mugs of grease, and small children. Children, the other, other, white meat. * He's fat. People are scared. #12 - Posted by: GreatestAmericanHero on June 28, 2004 09:52 AMHe'd wait until he cooked the fish? Not going to happen. #13 - Posted by: Michael on June 28, 2004 10:43 AMFahrenheit 9/11 ? Haven't heard of it. Does that have something to do with Clinton's book? Mikey Moore is like Jabba the Hutt except fatter and smellier. If only we can dress Princess Leia in a metal bikini and have her strangle him with a chain. #14 - Posted by: Josh on June 28, 2004 11:01 AMWhy hasn't Greenpeace sent a posse after Moore? Surely he emits more greenhouse gases than New Zealand's entire sheep population! You forgot one: Michael Moore is much beloved by the French. The same French who think Jerry Lewis is a god. #16 - Posted by: jonag on June 28, 2004 11:31 AMThey did make a documentary about moore recently. Mikey Moore likes monkeys -- 'nough said.
Shooting that creep would be a pleasure, but I dunno if my high-velocity rifle rounds would be able to penetrate all those countless layers of blubber. :-) -The Real Conservative Carl Hey Michael, do you think you get your head out of here? It is terribly crowded ya know! Between Hollywood, the retarded liberals, most of France and 27 Ultimate Bacon Cheeseburgers needing processed there is just no room. Sorry. #20 - Posted by: Sincerely, Your Ass on June 28, 2004 12:35 PMIf Michael Moore was on Survivor, he would be able to fry his rice simply by warming his fat, loathsome, effeminate, pinky over the fire. #21 - Posted by: Wolf's Dawn on June 28, 2004 01:04 PMWhen Michael Moore farts, it takes 3 years for thing to find its way out of his fat ass. #22 - Posted by: Bevan on June 28, 2004 01:09 PMYou've all missed the real fictional character that was based on Moore.... Pizza the Hut #23 - Posted by: Shtetl G on June 28, 2004 01:27 PMGotta love the "ass'" comment!! funny! #24 - Posted by: CCinCali on June 28, 2004 01:39 PMFarenhiet 9/11 is the first propaganda film to win the Palm D Oure (sp? - I hate French) at Cannes . Well, the first since Triumph of The Will won in 1941-1944. What will he do for a sequel? Maybe Farenhiet 170: The Temperature at Which Cheeseburgers are Well Done. Oh, and it looks like Mike the Hut will get the Oscar again. He ate the last one thinking it was made of chocolate. #25 - Posted by: Sam on June 28, 2004 01:57 PMHey Michael, can you do something about Isaac Asimov's attorneys? They are crawling all over me. Something about how you can't have an original thought so you stole his intellectual property. I mean just because you call your new fiction movie "Fahrenheit 9/11: the temperature at which Freedom burns" and he wrote a classic novel in 1953 called "Fahrenheit 451: the temperature at which Books Burn" they think you are copying him. Oh, and eat a carrot will ya? I am looking like a giant bean bag chair. ^^ I think you mean Ray Bradbury, and yes, he wants his title back........... #27 - Posted by: Techie on June 28, 2004 02:30 PMOf course I meant Ray Bradbury! But I am an ass! I never get a message right! Michael, it was Ray Bradbury whose lawyers are ticked off. So come up with an original name will ya! Here are some suggestions: Bowling for Bullsh*t My Big Fat Geek Propaganda Movie Around the Buffet 80 Times Kill Dubya vol 1 or 10 Things I Hate About America #28 - Posted by: Your Ass on June 28, 2004 02:46 PMMichael: Shut up Monkey, you don't smell so good yourself! Why can't you be like the hamster over there? He never complains. He is just eating cheesburgers. #30 - Posted by: Your Ass on June 28, 2004 03:07 PMThey ain't Twinkies, Ass. #31 - Posted by: Twinkie the butt monkey on June 28, 2004 03:10 PMAh say there sir! Ah am no hampster sir -- Ah am a gerbil! Ah am the gerbil -- Coo, choo, ca-choo! #32 - Posted by: Twinlkies' Gerbil pal, Wild Bill Butt Mouse on June 28, 2004 03:18 PMMy apologies bill. It was insensitive of me to ASSume that you were a hamster. If you no longer wish to ASSociate with me I understand. I have been ASSigned the task of ASSimilating all ASSorted butt personnel into a happy working unit. I deeply regret my ASSinine remark. I hope Michael doesn't try and make a documentary about my insensitivity. I don't think I could hold another camera in here. #33 - Posted by: Moore's Ass on June 28, 2004 03:33 PMCan't we all just get along? #34 - Posted by: Twinkie the butt monkey, Wild Bill butt mouse and Michael's Giagantic arse... on June 28, 2004 03:58 PMsorry, didn't mean to be an...oh nevermind. Oh great! Now Rodney King is talking about kicking me. Twinkie, why do you always have to make a stink? He said he was going to 'Go Midievil' on me...anybody know what that means? #35 - Posted by: Moore's Ass on June 28, 2004 04:20 PMThey provide no confirmation about John Candy's untimely death, just after appearing in a Michael Moore film 'Candian Bacon'... But... [drumroll] John Candy was Canadian... HHHhhhhhhhmmmmmmmmm..... And John Candy's last name is 'Candy'... And Michael Moore is enormously fat... HHHhhhhhhmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.... [Scene... children playing on playground equipment, flying kites, laughter... giggling] [rising up the faint sound of frying bacon as one of the children's faces turns to reveal it's a little John Candy look-alike] [The sound of frying rises as the John Candy face grows then contorts into pain] [Then the sound strikes out of Howard Deans cry] YYYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGHHHHHHH! Can't you see it! Michael ate Moore Candy which demonstrates he would have eaten the Canadian John Candy... LIKE BACON! #36 - Posted by: DANEgerus on June 28, 2004 04:26 PMI have no comment at this time on the death of Mr. Candy. Now that Kevin Bacon guy...uh sorry on the advice of my attorney I have nothing further to say. #37 - Posted by: Moore's Ass on June 28, 2004 04:36 PMI think if Michael Moore ever had a shave, he would look exactly like Peter Griffin. In fact, if any Hollywood types are casting a live-action Family Guy, Michael Moore is a shoe-in. I bet I won't get paid for my great idea, though. #38 - Posted by: BeckoningChasm on June 28, 2004 04:57 PMMichael Moore is the "Champion of the Little Guy" which is ironic because his ass has its own zip code. #39 - Posted by: Sam on June 28, 2004 05:09 PMI want to bring up a point that has been overlooked by everyone..... Michael Moore sure is fat and ugly. Bevan... you win for funniest comment so far. hehe Frank J.... loved the Moore's law twist. A joke for the geeks is always good for a cheap pop. #41 - Posted by: krakatoa on June 28, 2004 08:25 PMIt's only a film, stuff like this hits the tabliods every day, there are far worse things being said about Bush and America every day, and most of it is true, and what's more it's actually a well made film. You might think that they guy is a baboon and that the content of the film is garbage, but as a documentary or a work of fiction it has provoked more political debate in America than anything else since Star and Clinton spared together. But it's not going to make a big difference. Kerry supporter will plaster this film all over the headlines, but they're already Kerry supporters so it doesn't make much difference to them, and Bush supporters are going to try and trash this film, but because they are already Bush supporters it's not going to change their mind on who to vote for. The only people that this will affect are swing voters and non voters who decide to register this year because of the conflict, and their votes wil be split evenly between Kerry (the liberals) and Bush (the non liberals), and most of them made up their minds already because of their support or lack of support for the newest gulf war. Anti war voters will vote Kerry, war suporters will vote Bush, some of them will watch this film, and some of them won't but at the end of the day they will will have already made up their minds before going to see it. It's like the OJ Simpson trial, everybody knew, in inverted commas, that he did it or that he didn't do it before the jury walked through the gate. #42 - Posted by: Angry Chinese Blogger on June 29, 2004 12:02 AMThank you Angry Chinese blogger. I was beginning to think there wouldn't be a single other sensible person to respond to this. All of you people clearly eliminate any possibility of anyone taking you or your opinions seriously, by going on FOREVER about how much fat someone has on their body, like fucking 9 year olds. Jesus. You spend all your time analyzing Michael Moore's ass, and no time thinking about the American soldiers who die needlessly, as we type. #43 - Posted by: Disgusted on June 29, 2004 12:39 AM"If he ever lost all his money though (probably spending it all on pork rinds) and became a hobo, how could anyone tell?" He'd quit making movies? Well, one can hope, anyway. Michael Moore burning in hell would actually GENRERATE heat, since he would cause a massive grease fire there. Disgusted: If you think we don't think about the American soldiers who have died, check out the archives. If you think they've died needlessly, check out the archives. Kill The Bastards! #46 - Posted by: Bob in Feenicks on June 29, 2004 02:22 AMDisgusted, Sorry, I thought we were all being silly in response to a comedy piece written by Frank. No one but you considered this a serious discussion about the topic. As far as your assertion that our soldiers over there die needlessly, I suggest you go to New York and have a look at the World Trade Centers... Oh wait, you can't. All you can look at is the memorial of almost 3000 innocent people that dies needlessly. Our soldiers have died defending those of us that are left. And there have been zero attacks on US soil since 9/11 at a time when you can bet that every terorist on the planet wants a follow up attack on America. So to suggest that those soldiers that have died died needlessly is to spit on their graves. To say they sacrificed their lives for no purpose is to slap their families in the face. Frankly, to say it was needless is, well, disgusting. #47 - Posted by: Lighten up on June 29, 2004 09:07 AMBut didn't Michael Moore say that American deaths ARE what's needed? http://www.michaelmoore.com/words/message/index.php?messageDate=2004-04-14 ...I'm confused, Disgusted - are you a Moore-on or aint'cha? #48 - Posted by: Alex on June 29, 2004 12:29 PMWell done, but you should have placed more emphasis on "fat and ugly." He's awfully fat and ugly, you know. #49 - Posted by: Ernie G on June 29, 2004 02:10 PMThat was seriously one of the funniest joke lists ever!! #50 - Posted by: its jake on June 29, 2004 04:35 PMTwo points. 1) fat burns, so blubberboy's inflamation in the Pit is going to improve Hell's bottom line. 2) "Just one thin waaaaferrr..." #51 - Posted by: Jason Bontrager on June 29, 2004 08:39 PMCome on now, people. Mikey the Hutt isn't really all that ugly. For a quarter-ton sack of garbage, that is. #53 - Posted by: zetetic on June 30, 2004 02:55 PMNo, Dick, if we were talking about Limbaugh, we'd say, "He seems to be putting weight on again. Still has a long way to go to catch up with Moore, though." #54 - Posted by: zetetic on June 30, 2004 02:57 PMThis is now one of my favorite sites. All of the above is true. especially the part about Michael Moore's ugliness. #55 - Posted by: Brendan on June 30, 2004 03:53 PMAm I the only Monty Python fan who Michael Moore reminds of Mr. Creosote? #56 - Posted by: CHEEEEEEESE on June 30, 2004 11:40 PMI think he did a wonderful job on the movie. We all know on some parts during the movie,he was telling the truth. #57 - Posted by: Jessica on July 1, 2004 10:47 PMYou know... (a) Conservatives didn't really gain any real *points* by bashing the movie before it was released. You have to actually go see it so that you can pretend to give it some thought before turning on the AutoBash (tm). (He doesn't even appear much in Fahrenheit 9/11; thus, his fatness and ugliness are cunningly removed from the picture. Diabolical!) (b) By parroting the pre-release party line, you're stating that either (i) the conservative blogosphere was prescient, nay, downright clairvoyant in seeing exactly what was wrong with Michael Moore, or (ii) you still haven't seen it. (c) Your ad hominem attack is only so-so. You're going to need more range than "fat and ugly". The bit about Aquaman was a change... lame, but a change. Unfortunately, you then returned to "fat and ugly", believing that it would stop Michael Moore. It didn't stop Newt Gingrich, Rush Limbaugh or Ann Coulter. (I tell you, that healthy-looking blonde exterior is nothing but a cunning facade. She's a harpy! A vicious, stone-taloned harpy bent on clawing the flesh from the bones of every liberal on earth!) (d) In any case, ad hominem attacks make the Baby Jesus cry, much like mullets and the goatse guy. #58 - Posted by: grendelkhan on July 2, 2004 02:28 AMSo this is what the righties do all day... act like fourth graders... Does anyone have anything intelligent to say? Didn't think so. I came here to get the conservatives opinion and points of view, yet again to have miserably failed. You people waste too much time talking about some fat guy... yeah he's a lard ass and isn't so attractive, but is that really what's important at this time? In no way do you add anything positive to promote anything good in this country. Educate yourselves and then open your mouths. I'm done here... I feel like i'm losing brain cells just being here. #59 - Posted by: Beth on July 2, 2004 10:34 AMLighten up, I did NOT say American soldiers died worthlessly. Their bravery and self-sacrifice is definitely worthy of all the respect in the world. But I hate it when "needlessly" and "worthlessly" are confused. There was no NEED for these brave men and women to die. Do the twin towers stand this day? No. We're 3000 innocent american lives brutally murdered? Yes. But sorry to burst all of your bubbles: Saddam Hussein did not fly the planes, did not control them with a little joystick, did not order their flight paths, and did not train the bastard terrorists and hijackers who did all those things. Maybe if this was understood by all Americans - both the citizens of this coutry, and more importantly the government officials who NEEDLESSLY send the troops into danger - there would be no graves to spit on, and no grieving families' faces to slap - NOT that I did those things, or meant to do those things. p.s. I'm a Canadian, and I wouldn't consider myself a "Moore-on" as you put it Alex, but simply someone who knows what they believe in. #60 - Posted by: Disgusted on July 2, 2004 08:45 PMHave you ever heard the term ad hominem? Judging by the intellectual level of the rhetoric I've read in my fruitless search to discredit the images that I saw in Fahrenheit 9/11 I think not. So for those of you without a dictionary handy, my American Heritage Dictionary defines it as "attacking an opponent's character to avoid discussing the issues." As a God-fearing, registered GOP voter, former marine, etc, etc, I decided that it was my duty to balance Moore's assertions with conventional wisdom from others in my party. Much to my dismay sites such as this one seem to be our only hope, yet the best they can come up with to refute Moore's point of view is to say he's fat and ugly? What the f*&k does Michael Moore's appearance have to do with the fact that my brothers who are unfortunate enough to still be enlisted are dying alone across the world from their families. Meanwhile, the only credible explanation for the war they are fighting is met by "well, he must be wrong because he's fat." My research into this film is over, as is my membership in the Republican party and my faith in the Bush family. I am sad to say that this war is not what I enlisted for, and my brothers still in Iraq have worse things to say about Bush than anyone in the theater said when I saw the movie. I'm sad to say that "Disgusted" is right...our soldiers died and continue to die worthlessly. If you don't believe me, enlist and you'll see it for yourself. #61 - Posted by: Joshua Braun on July 4, 2004 01:25 AMFat? FAT? Michael Moore aka Refrigerator Fairy? I'm shocked. I thought he just had bloat from that time of the month......... #62 - Posted by: Someday I'll Tell You...Not! on July 4, 2004 04:54 AMBut come to think of it, I did hear the Goodyear Blimp is retiring.....maybe Moore could apply for that job......can you imagine the TERROR, the absolute HORROR of seeing THAT floating by your window.......it's bad enough when THAT appears on the television.....on the other hand, if he floated over an Air Force Base he would make a hard-to-miss target......ah yes, the anti-terrorist alert would go out.....BLAM....SPLAT (oops, filled up the Grand Canyon...oh well, we lost a national attraction but SAVED THE WORLD!) #63 - Posted by: Someday I'll Tell You...Not! on July 4, 2004 05:03 AMInsightful criticism! #64 - Posted by: tobotnik on July 5, 2004 10:08 AMit's funny, i listen to the right and they wail about 'liberal hate speech' if this isnt the conservative doppleganger, i don't know what is. #65 - Posted by: Ken on July 5, 2004 12:18 PMThough it may be fat er I mean fun (freudian slip there) to talk about Micheal Moore personally ,Ken brought up an interesting point.(yeah I said that with a straight face) Fatty fatty fat fat. Ha Ha! I'm so witty. Fat fatty fat fatty fat. OMG, I'm laughing so hard my dick hurts! Fatty fat fat stinky fat. Oh, sweet Jesus! I cannot stop the explosive laughter. I am so fucking funny God is crying! Fatty fat sinky fat in an old baseball hat. CHRIST, please - someone make me stop! Ha ha ha! Lord forgive me for I know not how funny I am. Fat ass fatty fat fat. A baby just died, that's how funny I am! FAT!!!! FAT!!!!! #67 - Posted by: TurthRegister on July 6, 2004 11:07 AMSeriously, have you the mentality of a 2 year old??? Michael Moore is fat. so what. He at least demonstrates a brain. Even if EVERYTHING he says is a lie (even though I consider myself a fan, Im not going to pretend everything he says is the truth), hes at least intelligent enough to make 1000s of people believe it. If the whole movie was Moore flat out, literally calling Bush an idiot or a buffoon, than this waste of webspace you call a post could be justified in a satirical way. However, it just comes across as childish and moronic. You dont like Moore, fine. Dont waste our time pretending that you have something menaningful to say. #68 - Posted by: BC on July 6, 2004 03:44 PMCould you post a picture of yourself so we could see what a handsome slender person you must be. #69 - Posted by: Baldwin on July 7, 2004 12:29 AMAnother Moore distortion? Bin Ladens Fsmily did leave the country after September 11th.They left on the 24th of September for fear for their lives, after they had been interviewed by the FBI. Granted the interviews were not conducted the way the FBI would have liked but They were still conducted. Oh does any one rember al Zarqoui, Salman Pak or U.S. Federal Judge Harold Baer's ruling that credible eveidence existed that would link Sadam to Ossamma amd 9-11. Even though Dubya NEVER said that the link existed. Dear Joshua Braun, wow, I can't believe I wasted 10 minutes of my time reading this. I wish I could say that it was an enlightening experience, but alas, this is like reading a conversation between tweedle dum and tweedle dee. At least I don't have to worry about that sort of thing up here in Canada, we canadian ALL hate our leaders (well not all, but about 90%). #72 - Posted by: Aubrey on July 8, 2004 02:26 AMI think this Ronin guy is gay. Not just kinda gay, but flaming from his ass-hole gay. Did you wake up this morning and decide you wanted to fuck fat guys Ro? Is this what this homoerotic right wing crap is about? YOu little kids need to get a clue!!! How long until you get it? The Bush's and all of the people that fly in their little flock are the purest form of evil. Spawn of Satan. #73 - Posted by: Gipper on July 8, 2004 11:12 AMDear Joshua Braun, Dear Joshua, Futrhermore save your war stories for civilians who are A) impressed by them or B)will give you sympathy. As a service member you are obligated to be non-partisan. You volunteered for it. #75 - Posted by: The real Marty on July 8, 2004 01:20 PMI've read all the humor and I've read all of the more serious comments. In the final analasis.....Michael Moore is a big fat, smelly, dirty,did I mention FAT, cheeseburger gulpin, did I mention FAT, dirty, smelly, lying,fat(I did mention that),liberal,anti-american,commie,pinko,.....Kerry lovin,anti-american(they kinda go together,don't they),Fat liar. He hates America, but ja ever notice that he doesn't hate America enough to leave. Just because all you people on here are sub intelligent pieces of shit doesn't mean trashing michael moore with fat and ugly statements is going to make any of you smarter that man is more intelligent and more tallented than you can imagine and just because you have some fucked up hard on over the Bush admin doesn't mean you are right about what you say, lets recap i have read most of your stupid comments and I have come to this conclusive but not entirely accruate understanding: Michael Moore is 1. Overweight fi you find this surprizing take a look at the american populous we are a group of obeise people, 2. Michael Moore doesn't shave well this one is apparent but again look at some of the respectible people in our society and you will find alot of unkept beards and facial hair, 3. Michael Moore would never use any of the following: A. Treadmill B. Soap C. shaving blade. I will tell you what when you find some good actual information on Michael Moore other than his hygine e-mail me. Oh and fatty cheese ball your post before this was the most anti-american post I have ever read that unless of course you are a neo-nazi calling him a "commie, pinko" tisk tisk now if you are a real american you would be able you accpet any russain american man who has the right to be here as much as whatever imigrant who squeezed you out from in between her thighs. #77 - Posted by: veritas on July 8, 2004 10:42 PMNot to be critical of you 'open minded' people but Micheal Moore won the Cannes film festival award and even if his facts are all skewed and the movie is false, It still was a well done film. Hey do you want a ral fact? :There are more people that hate Bush then approve of him and this movie will only add to the Bush haters. #78 - Posted by: Enigma on July 9, 2004 03:11 AMI have tears pouring down my cheeks from all my laughing while reading this post- I especially liked that MM is afraid of healthy vegetables and facts. ANd the one about the baseball cap on the pile of manure was a riot, too. Thanks for making my day! #79 - Posted by: crikey on July 10, 2004 03:06 PMJoshua Braun is a good reason for an ip log or reg to post here.. One sec he is a marine/gop then next he is not because you guys called moore fat? I agree it's childish but moorelies.com or hardylaw.net or bowlingfortruth.com has the facts.. Maybe the low blow childish insults attract liars like Joshie or the fact he went to those sites listed and couldn't deal with real deal about Moore. I also like to say i agree about the childish fat remarks. So many sores on Moore do you need to go to his looks yet? Also on the Canada stuff both this film and BFC were made by or release by Canadaian companys(LionsGate/AtlanticAlliance), so maybe yanks need to look up north more, aye? #80 - Posted by: Lee0tick on July 11, 2004 08:37 AM"Also on the Canada stuff both this film and BFC were made by or release by Canadaian companys(LionsGate/AtlanticAlliance), so maybe yanks need to look up north more, aye?" Lee0 As far as the inmature things on the website, the website tells you it's that type of page at the top, so don't act shocked people. #81 - Posted by: Windhammer on July 11, 2004 09:18 AMJust so you know, there are a lot of us Canadians that respect our neighbours to the south. Unfortunately, it's our Liberal media that likes to show us as American haters. If it were up to them, we would be USSR2. Personally, even though I don't agree with everything Bush has done in his first 4 years, I truly believe that he was and still is the best man for the job. What exactly did the rest of the world expect the US to do after 9/11? Bend over and take another one up the a$$??? Al Queda should thank their God that Bush is the President of the US, and not me. I would have spared my military and just sent over some mushroom clouds to the work. Al Queda takes out a plane, I take out an airport. Somehow, Frank, I sense a certain level of dislike in your attitude towards dear, ol' Mickey Moore-on - That's good - you show considerable taste in your expression of distaste. However, you need to learn not to hold back - let it all out - tell us what you reallllly think of the guy! #83 - Posted by: JB on July 13, 2004 06:44 PMI can't believe how incredibly disrespectful and infantile this is. I don't even have the words to describe how upsetting this article is. Honestly, everytime I read something this moronic, I lose just that much more faith in humanity. #84 - Posted by: laura on July 14, 2004 09:26 AMSeriously people. You have nothing nothing nothing except immature fat and ugly jokes about a man who has more class and intelligence than to expose others by physical faults. I was researching both sides of the argument and i just became depressed over the fact that the anti Michael sites just prove him right: The U.S does need some serious "edumacation" and reform. Bush's followers have really shown what they are about. Ignorant and lowly. Good Luck in life being stupid. #85 - Posted by: Stuid Site on July 15, 2004 02:15 PMSeriously people. You have nothing nothing nothing except immature fat and ugly jokes about a man who has more class and intelligence than to expose others by physical faults. I was researching both sides of the argument and i just became depressed over the fact that the anti Michael sites just prove him right: The U.S does need some serious "edumacation" and reform. Bush's followers have really shown what they are about. Ignorant and lowly. Good Luck in life being simple. #86 - Posted by: ignorant Site on July 15, 2004 02:16 PMI rather be fat and ugly making bank and exposing a broad view on politics than be ignorant foolish trash making stupid comments out of jealousy and shame. #87 - Posted by: jack on July 15, 2004 02:20 PM"I hope it doesn't go that way(I like Canada) but just saying you like the usa no longer works as allies." How about providing 3/5 of the troops to Afghanistan? #88 - Posted by: Joanne on July 17, 2004 12:59 AMYou know, the idea that someone would actually read this post to hear the "other side's opinion" is like watching "Monty Python and the Holy Grail" to learn about medieval England. The post here by Frank J. was obviously meant to be funny. He is not engaging in a serious debate, just offering an opinion with a bit of humor. Lighten up a bit! #89 - Posted by: mom1097 on July 18, 2004 04:21 PMWHAT A BUNCH OF SHEEP YOU PEOPLE ARE. YOU'RE BEING LED AROUND BY A BUNCH OF CROOKS. THE BUSH FAMILY HAS BEEN IN BED WITH THE SAUDI'S FOR YEARS. "SHEEP ON" YOU LOSERS. ONE DAY YOU'LL LIVE IN TH NAZI REGIME THAT BUSH WANTS. #90 - Posted by: WILL on July 19, 2004 11:20 AMMichael Moore noun: A greasy middleaged 200 kilo log who wears a sports cap. Writes and directs documentries about hating and who to hate. Hope the fat slob chokes to death on a pork rind(s). #91 - Posted by: nathan on July 20, 2004 10:39 PMMichael Moore is nothing but a hate monger. To call him fat and ugly is being too nice. All his "documentaries" have serious fabrications. He has every right to speak his voice, but he needs to sell his crap as non-fiction. To all you liberals who have lost faith in humanity because of a fat post, maybe you need to look within your own party. Some of the hateful venom and threats spewed from your party and your hero Michael Moore towards the president and anyone who doesn't share your views has gone far worse than fat jokes. I agree with issues from both sides, but cannot deal with the mentality of the left. Oh and as far as Michael Moore being fat and ugly? Indeed he is. #92 - Posted by: Lila on July 22, 2004 11:23 PMA small sampling of whom and what is unequivocally smarter than you fat feeders: That should tide you over until MM does something really stupid again like stand up for your RIGHT to call him fat. Carry on... Dude, you Americans are all a bunch of fucking idiots. Uneducated pieces of dumb shit! #94 - Posted by: bart on July 25, 2004 07:38 PMI agree with the pior conment #95 - Posted by: Veritas on July 26, 2004 01:53 AMHAHAHAHA!!! Some of you americans are fucking ignorant pricks. ALL of your media is distorted and leading, you dumbasses! #97 - Posted by: Bob Spunkhouse on July 27, 2004 10:55 AMDid Bush twisted the facts and the truth for propaganda ? Sure... Carrying a gun mean precisely dick because of the fact that even though you fought for this pathetic excuse for a country isn't grounds for dismissing a case of murder so too bad to brust your bubble redneck fuck so go protect your country and come back with no benefits or reawards for risking your ass congrats you are a american now go sit in your trailer in some lonely town and think about how i just handed you your ass. #99 - Posted by: Veritas on July 31, 2004 06:53 PMNow that i have finished reading the rest of the new trash I'd like for Alain Dupont to creat a movie the would even qualify to enter the Cannes Film Festival. So before you trash foreigen affairs think about what they are and how much it takes to be apart of them. And if youare thinking about convicting moore of treason for construding the facts, bush is right next to him. #100 - Posted by: Veritas on July 31, 2004 06:59 PMI agree with the proir statement the statement proir to the prior and the statement before dipshit and his or her film festival trashing #101 - Posted by: Veritas on July 31, 2004 07:02 PMMicheal Moore is truly the penis of satan. Although the girth is massive the structure is short and phlasive.his mind is constructed of bile and hatred and soon with the french whore he'll be mated.and the son of this mating shall be called ADOLPH #102 - Posted by: Jerry Tolbert on August 1, 2004 08:17 AMI know I'm gonna get flamed for this, but who cares. You people are out of control. I can't believe this ****shit. The insults you can come up with is fat and ugly. Wow, how old are you 5?! Michael Moore tells it like it is, and the way it should be. But is he respected at all? No, he gets made fun of because he's overweight, while the person who made this Blog probably weighs more than Michael. Jerry, please learn about grammar and punctuation. The fact that there are people like you, Frank, out there scares me. I can't believe this. This isn't just not PC, it's an insane hatefest that people are taking part of. SO you are all for the war, and the innocent men and women being sent out to their deaths? While you all sit in your comfy chairs while they were being shot at and car bombs were going off? How does that make any sense? I'm most likely going to be told 3 things, 1) I'm a 'chick' and should shut up, 2) STFU you're fucking wrong, or 3) Michael is fat. Like that has anything to do with anything, AT ALL! All I'm asking of you is to think about how this country is being ruled, who's ruling, (and yes I know I used the word 'ruled' instead of 'runned by') and why aren't we being told the truth? Once you can answer those questions and be completely truthful to yourself, you will understand. Until then, peace. #103 - Posted by: Lisette Cole on August 2, 2004 07:34 PMMichael Moore "tells it like it is." That is complete and utter buffoonery. Michael Moore hates Bush, it's that plain and simple. It's one thing to have an opinion, but to use biased facts and made up information to hurt another person is unethical and immoral. "SO you are all for the war, and the innocent men and women being sent out to their deaths? While you all sit in your comfy chairs while they were being shot at and car bombs were going off? How does that make any sense? " Sent out to their deaths? Hardly. These brave men and women are there because they want to be; they are fighting for something they believe in. You ask any parent of a soldier who has died and they will tell you how proud they are. Hundreds of thousands or men and women were tortured, raped, and killed in Iraq. American soldiers over there ending the genocide. "Once you can answer those questions and be completely truthful to yourself, you will understand. Until then, peace." Do you know everything about the current situations in Iraq? Were you there with President Bush as he was being informed by Intelligence? Do you know all the facts? You get your information from the media, and I hate to say it, but they have an agenda, and are not as fair and balanced as they claim. Lastly, always remember, no matter which political party the president is associated with, he is still the President of the United States of America and the Commander in Chief. Though I never particulary cared for President Clinton, I would still shake his hand and put my hand to my heart if he walked by. #104 - Posted by: Chris on August 3, 2004 08:21 PMI read through most of Franks list, Firstly How old are you Frank?? 5! or perhaps you where trying to be funny, for a 5 year old. Apart from the man been fat, what else could you say of interest and what the hell do you have against fat people, 54% of Americans are fat so that maeks YOU anti American.The old "My daddy could beat your Daddy" deal sucked when we where kids and still does #105 - Posted by: Mark on August 5, 2004 05:29 AMOne more point as I see so many well informed comments on France. If it was not for the French, the USA would still be British and thats a fact check it out.The French people said no to war and their president did as he was told,for the people by the people!! strange concept but it works #106 - Posted by: Mark on August 5, 2004 05:34 AMFisrt I would like to say that Ok, for all you people complaining about this website, insulting the maturity and intelligence of it's viewers, I think you should look at the fact that this is a FREAKING COMEDY WEBSITE, and there are 100 websites personally attacking Bush for each website like this. It's all just JOKES. Besides, what are you doing on this site anyway if you are a lib? Obviously it's a conservative website and you can't just shove your views down everyone's throat. Christ, people, get a life. #108 - Posted by: Concerned Citizen on August 8, 2004 01:39 PMI hate French people. They should bathe more. #109 - Posted by: American. on August 8, 2004 02:54 PMI'm just wondering what all of your ages are? #110 - Posted by: brian on August 8, 2004 04:41 PMExcellent Frank - I peed my pants reading this. btw - Lisette should STFU because she's obviously at the low end of the gene pool. #111 - Posted by: NYRepublican on August 12, 2004 11:37 AMI think it's funny how none of you can even make educated arguments as to Mr. Moore's films rather you insult his physical characteristics, which does nothing more then show that the reason you disagree with his film is because the concepts are just to difficult for you to understand. #112 - Posted by: Adam on August 12, 2004 02:12 PMWho the hell are all you idiots? You can't even spell, for God's sake, much less critique a friggin movie. Who the hell are all you idiots? You can't even spell, for God's sake, much less critique a friggin movie. *sigh* There are plenty of good reasons to not like his film. The physical characteristics are used for a COMIC point, not a serious one. This isn't a serious topic, go to a forum if you want someone to listen to your opinions! This, my friends, is something called -comedy-. And you morons would be laughing your asses off if it was insulting Bush. You have to accept the fact that there is some jokes that work for you, and some that don't. You people need to grow up. #115 - Posted by: The Brain on August 13, 2004 04:16 PMNow all American if you make more in the technology FILED (Field) you should probally get a better education and learn how to spell. Also Fatass has a space between them, so please use your BREAIN (Brain and stop try to spell words like yopu (you) and shhot (shot) because you suck at it. By the way it you intend to insult someone do it the right way, raghead is normally refered to Towelhead. Again to help you rid yourself of that terible stupidity just remember that you got your shit handed to you by a 17 year old who wasn't in the vietnam war fuckhead. #116 - Posted by: Veritas on August 14, 2004 11:48 PMI wonder why I'm on this website if I hate republicans so much. Why aren't I at a Michael Moore fan-site, bowing down to him and kissing his ass? I guess I'm just a fucking moron. #117 - Posted by: Veritas on August 15, 2004 03:27 AMYour right MM is a fat pig, but he is right, your president is as thick as pig shit. Lets be honest Ron Regan talked more sense, but judging on some of the comments in favour of G.W.B, your all as thick as pig shit #118 - Posted by: alan on August 17, 2004 12:00 PMall you americans are fat pigs, you should all kiss my ass. my brothers will shit on you. I laughed at your 911. americans soliders are the bastered spawn of dogs. #119 - Posted by: ajimr on August 17, 2004 12:18 PMFrank J., you are a perfect example as why I continually tell my children to study hard, get good grades, further your education and become a good example for the next generation. Now I can show them your site to prove to them without the above, you may turn out to be another Frank J. of this world. It is the brainless people such as yourself who can not think their way out of wet paper bag who use appearance over substance. I wear glasses, which means if you and I were to ever debate, your responses to me would include references to me being a "four eyes" rather than an intelligent recourse. Enjoy your mental incapabilities and good luck with your "special" attributes. #120 - Posted by: Al P. Cee on August 17, 2004 02:20 PMShut up four-eyes, Frank J is a genius. ^__^ #121 - Posted by: Fan on August 17, 2004 06:47 PM*raises eyebrow* ..Right... Well, guys, you're very funny, but in a sad way! The most intelligent response you could possibly find is a series of name-calling-hateful-comments against someone that may or may not try to show you the truth. You do not have the power to shut the entire world up and you never will. You may buy some of our leaders, but Europe will always try to stop your "justice and freedom". All that happened to you on 9/11 was fully deserved (although I, as any intelligent man, will never accept such actions, no matter they are commited to you or by you). You can not win a fight against terror as long as you are the main terrorist state in the world, as long as you think yourselves as being the most important people on the face of the Earth. What gives you the right to impose your will on others? Thank God you do not have the power! I have to thank you and your president for making Europe stronger than it could ever get on its own, and giving the world a new enemy: yourselves! Soon Europe will unite and you can not take us all! The way things are going and the path you keep on taking will eventually trigger a nuclear terrorist attack, and I know it's a terrible thing to say, but I'd rather it were in America! It is not to late to get civilized! It's not to late to stop sucking the world like some parasites and do the right thing! It's not to late to let everyone live in peace! It's not to late to become again the America that everyone looked up to in the past! I hope you will... The millions of Europeans that marched for peace, the same that marched for your dead, hope in a true America! Stop hating and you will not be hated anymore! #123 - Posted by: JustYourAverageEuropean on August 22, 2004 07:35 AMIt was said once and I'll say it AGAIN. For the people who keep going on and on about how this website is a disgrace because of the fat jokes (which by the way are hilar), this site is based on COMEDY. We aren't here to please the liberalists of the world. We're only here to make stupid, funny comments in our little Fate Moore Community. Just leave you're overly critical comments to someones fan page and get the hell out of here, because after all, we aren't here to support or even argue with people like you. By the way, Michael Moore lives at the dump a few miles down the street if anyone is interested in making a documentary about how a fat greaseballed fluffalufagous lives. Just let me know and I'll give you some directions! #124 - Posted by: DBNC on August 23, 2004 02:48 AMThis site is dumb. A four-year-old could come up with more relevant facts than you. #125 - Posted by: matt on August 28, 2004 10:45 PMThis is my first time reading this COMEDY website (referred by FreeRepublic - CommieLibs: go there to be truly educated and be ready to get your asses handed to you - if you care to get into a serious debate!)- I haven't laughed this hard in ages! Frank, you are so freakin' hillarious! Great lowbrow humor! I love reading the posts posted by the serious pro-Moore people - what a bunch of pompous, intellectually dishonest, hypocritical losers! I love this website! Count me in!! GO BUSHIE 2004!!! #126 - Posted by: Mexi-Pubbie on August 30, 2004 03:26 AMYou suck!! Michael Moore Opened my eyes to many things about our so "Honest" president. How do you explain all the findings in his movie?I would be mortified and seriously worried if Bush won the upcoming Election. #127 - Posted by: Jan on August 31, 2004 02:01 AMMicheal Moore is my boy with his pack of lies (oop i mean documentary). Unfairly slandering ( i mean showing the truth) about bush I am a shoo in. Then me and my rich commie ( i mean progressive advocate wife). Can make Red China look like frat party compared to what I am going to do. Ooops I meant I am for the working man thats it, and health care and whatever will make you feel better about me. #128 - Posted by: John Kerry on September 11, 2004 02:36 PMMicheal Moore is my boy with his pack of lies (oop i mean documentary). Unfairly slandering ( i mean showing the truth) about bush I am a shoo in. Then me and my rich commie ( i mean progressive advocate wife). Can make Red China look like frat party compared to what I am going to do. Ooops I meant I am for the working man thats it, and health care and whatever will make you feel better about me. #129 - Posted by: John Kerry on September 11, 2004 02:37 PMyes hmmm that man sure is fat and ugly ... we should kidnap him, cover him with honey and 100 doller bills, then drop him into a pit of lawyers.... but no, he would just eat the honey... plus then we'd have to get near that fat, ugly, smelly man... nevermind. #130 - Posted by: hannah on September 21, 2004 07:30 PM5652 How can this all be right? Check out my site http://www.pai-gow-keno.com #131 - Posted by: pai gow on October 5, 2004 02:26 PMwhat does michael moore being fat and ugly have to do with anything? are you just trying to bash him for that since theres nothing else? maybe hes right and you dont wanna admit it? hmmm.. #132 - Posted by: Liz on November 8, 2004 06:52 PMDon't you get it, Liz? We could easily make fun of him for real, but Frank is making this as a comedy bit. His overuse of fat and ugly is obviously for comedic reasons. We don't even have to make fun of him, his actions make fun of himself. Yes, we could bring up real reasons why we hate him, but why? We could go to another site to talk about that, here we just get to laugh at Frank's comic genius (yet again). #133 - Posted by: nick on November 10, 2004 02:06 AMPost a comment
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