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September 10, 2004
Another Possible Forgery
I decided to practice what I preach and analyze some documentation myself. Here is one of the memos that CBS has released and say that their experts have verified it as authentic:
I noticed something peculiar on close examination, though. While this memo is mono-spaced like most typewriters from the era, look closely at the spacing. There is 1.03mm of space blank space between each letter but, in 1973, the common blank space between letters was 1.07mm. Typewriters with 1.03mm spacing between letters are those more common of the 80's. Thus, I am 65% certain that this is in fact a forgery. I'm still examining the PowerPoint slides CBS obtained which are reportedly also from 1973 and detail how Bush was AWOL, and, if I find any historical inaccuracies in them, I’ll report back. 56 Responses To "Another Possible Forgery"
WooHoo!! First...and am so pleased we have such a super-smart Frank working on OUR side. #1 - Posted by: DixieDarlin' on September 10, 2004 05:59 PMNot first, but top ten. I'd be interested to see the Excel spreadsheets that the TANG used to log Bush's training exercises with. #3 - Posted by: brandon on September 10, 2004 06:16 PMTrue story: I worked as a teller in a bank and one time someone shows up with a stolen check, from Joe's Bar. The signature actually read "Joe's Bar Manager" Thanks for the flashback, Frank. N. O'Brain I think the document above could be real. And Al Gore is the real President. And Micheal Moore is not a lair. And the moon landing was faked. And Smurfet did not have sex with any of the other Smurfs. And W stands for wrong. And all 250 Swift Boat Vets are liars. Did I leave anything out? lol #6 - Posted by: Wild Bill on September 10, 2004 07:03 PMKerry said he used IBM Office '71 to type rough drafts for his "Christmas in Cambodia" children's book. #7 - Posted by: Truth Peddler on September 10, 2004 07:14 PMAlGore is the acting former president with Clinton in the Hospital. Looks authentic to me. I say we turn it over to Dan. Pong... i'm rolling.. another great turn by Frank. #9 - Posted by: Lillian on September 10, 2004 08:06 PMThe following were sponsors of the CBS Evening News with Dan Rather on 10 September 2004. In light of CBS and Rather's use of forged documentation in a old story that had been discredited months ago, if anyone is interested in letting their advertisers know you are displeased with the direction they are funneling their advertising dollars, I present this list. Each has a website listed and where possible, I located the immediate corporate parent company of each. Most of these sites have a "Contact us" button near the bottom of the screen. Lamisil (www.lamisil.com) Parent company is Novartis Consumer Health (www.novartis.com) It sure looks like the CBS demographic trends "older" which kind of surprised me as older usually means conservative. #10 - Posted by: AMJoe on September 10, 2004 08:55 PMBwa ha ha ha! "Please take heed of this authentic memo from the seventies...which is now." Classic, Frank! #11 - Posted by: Katie on September 10, 2004 09:09 PMOoh, just noticed the "123 Fake Street"! Great Simpsons reference! Subtle and hi-larious! #12 - Posted by: Katie on September 10, 2004 09:11 PM"Great Simpsons reference! Subtle and hi-larious!" Accusing gentle Frank of stealing jokes from the Simpsons? Why, perish the thought! Every joke on IMAO is 100% guaranteed non-stolen from the Simpsons (or Futurama). #13 - Posted by: Chris D on September 10, 2004 09:30 PMAnd don't forget me not stealing from Family Guy and South Park. #14 - Posted by: Frank J. on September 10, 2004 09:35 PMHey how did Michael Moore miss these "documents"????? his film would have had so much more substance and credibility. #15 - Posted by: Leannbe on September 10, 2004 09:59 PMWhat is absolutely the funniest thing about this is that this forgery is way, way, way, way, way better than the forgeries that CBS have produced. Not only are they bad, they're really, really stupid. #16 - Posted by: Bill on September 10, 2004 10:10 PMNo, Frank. Bush's Superior Officer was Shiny McShine. More commonly known as 'Horshack's Mom'. Jack. #17 - Posted by: Jack Deth on September 10, 2004 10:28 PMThey almost pulled off a great forgery, until somone noticed they printed it on official "Spongebob Squarepants" stationary... #18 - Posted by: Bryan on September 10, 2004 10:46 PMThe letter above looks like an authentic cirica 70s government document so I`m convinced Bush is Evil and a bad person. Thanks for the info, now I can vote for Kerry because he`s a real war hero who singlehandedly defeated the communist North Vietnamese and would have conquored China had that evil Nixon not intervened and ended Americas campaign of global domination. #19 - Posted by: Joatmoaf on September 10, 2004 10:53 PMAMJoe: It is plain that even under the preponderance of evidence to the contrary, Dan Rather refuses to admit to the furtherance of lies to accomplish his, and I suspect CBS’s goal of diminishing our President and promoting the left wing agenda. As a result of this awareness, I will no longer utilize CBS for news or entertainment programming, nor will I patronize any of the sponsors affiliated with your network. HA! Now I even have each sponsor of record! This is a great effort by the blogfolken to make sh*t happen. Wow, this whole forgery thing is like a really good farside comic. This really good BTW, emailed it to my bro ;) #21 - Posted by: DittoBox on September 10, 2004 11:54 PMFrank J: I think I spotted another giveaway. If you look really closely, you can see that Bush's Superior Officer (BSO) actually signed in two places!!! While the lower BSO is consistent with the rest of the memo, the other one is clearly a forgery and doesn't match the neat, officerlike lettering of the bulk of the memo. On a hunch, I crunched this memo with my double-blind exo-endo _popcorn_ Fascist McFascist decoder ring, and the following secret message came out: He... is.... Mario.... Pong... and... he... is doing... seventies... chimp. Obviously this is some sort of evil sublinal message trying to convince weak-minded readers that Bush likes to pretend he is Italian and has a thing for chimps in ruffled shirts and tight fitting bell-bottoms. #23 - Posted by: krakatoa on September 11, 2004 06:43 AMI HAVE JUST FOUND A IBM SEL IN THE CLOSET AT WORK, WILL REPORT BACK LATER. Yes yes I know I am lame for going to the office on a weekend to look for a stupid typewriter, but hey some one said 10k so I am all over that! Jack, Frank's probably too young to get your last reference, but it was EPSTEIN's mother not Horshack's. #25 - Posted by: HammerUSNA@charter.net on September 11, 2004 01:10 PM"And don't forget me not stealing from Family Guy and South Park." I almost forgot about how you never did that. It was almost like it really happened in my mind. #26 - Posted by: Chris D on September 11, 2004 02:48 PMJack and Hammer...(huhuhu Jack/Hammer) Your absolutely correct, Chris D. It should have been Epstein's Mother. The revelation of my mistake occurred about ten minutes after posting it. Dang it, Frank! You're an Engineer. We need an Edit function to correct mistakes. Jack. And where exactly is Alabama, Florida? #28 - Posted by: Jack Deth on September 11, 2004 03:10 PMThis is absolutely hilarious. I was Laughing Out Loud. Thank You #29 - Posted by: rightonamerica.com on September 11, 2004 03:17 PMAMJoe, Thanks for the list. Next week, when the Merck, Novartis, Pfizer, Bayer, and Bristol-Meyers Squibb reps come calling on me at my office, we'll have more to talk about than why their drug is allegedly better than the competition's. Mheh. #30 - Posted by: Moriarty on September 11, 2004 03:34 PMThanks, Joshua: 'Welcome Back, Kotter' had its moments. Though I was more of a 'Barney Miller' fan. Both had good writers, but Hal Linden, Jack Soo, Max Gail and company had better range and delivery. Especially Steve Landesburg as Det. Dietrich. Jack. #31 - Posted by: Jack Deth on September 11, 2004 03:52 PMJack Deth, "Alabama, Florida" is everything to the left (or west) of Tallahassee. That part of the panhandle is usually known as "Lower Alabama"...for good reason. #32 - Posted by: Jolly Roger on September 11, 2004 04:02 PMJack,
That's the best looking document yet! Bwahahahaha! I sent this one to my favorite LLL. She's stopped talking to me, for some reason... #35 - Posted by: BarCodeKing on September 11, 2004 05:41 PMI'm not sure Charles Johnson will agree with Frank's analysis, but I am certain it is false. I just can't put my finger on why.... Excellent, Frank. Bravo. #36 - Posted by: Bill Roggio on September 11, 2004 10:59 PMBut where are the original documents, dammit??? #37 - Posted by: Donlan J on September 11, 2004 11:33 PMis that an Orange Crush stain on the paper? #38 - Posted by: ben on September 12, 2004 12:13 AMGreetings. Mr. Frank, "Embassy Electronic Intercept 1st. " Well it's either forgery and attempted frad involving a Federal document or theft of a paper from the estate of the late Col. When do you want us to arrest them director?" "Question. Transcription. It has been discovered that CBS has faked its hurricane coverage, using a street mime to walk against the wind in front of a projection screen with old movie clips of hurricanes. Shame CBS! #42 - Posted by: Mitch M on September 12, 2004 03:48 PMYou guys make me sick. CBS has the goods on Bush and they are now saying the reason they don't have the originals is because they haven't downloaded them from Killians hard drive. When they get that old 72' PC up and running yer gonna have egg on yer face! #43 - Posted by: Poppy on September 12, 2004 04:34 PM
#44 - Posted by: russ on September 12, 2004 10:51 PM
A-WALL wasn't used until at least 1981 when the millitary wuz finally able to replace their copies of the 1908 Oxford English Dictionary with the 1942 edition of Webster's New International Dictionary. Cheers #45 - Posted by: Another Problem on September 13, 2004 08:20 PMWith all the pain Dan has caused CBS in the past with his chicanery, don't you think they'd come to the obvious conclusion that it's time to send his smug, self-rightous a*s out sailing with his uncle Walter, for good! #46 - Posted by: Rich on September 13, 2004 08:33 PMI had been in the printing and engraving business in the 60's & 70's. We were constantly looking for equipment that could be "justified" meaning set flush right and left in a column and look proportionally spaced. There was no equipment available without going to "Photo Type" systems that were very expensive. The IBM Selectronic and Varityper were the only "Cold Type" setting machines and they did not justify well and had very limited proportional spacing. I am confident no typewriter was capable of proportional spacing and kerning without great expense and difficulty to achieve. Certainly no one would type a letter or memo with the extensive amount of expense and effort necessary, there is no justification to the expense vs results achieved. If there was a production machine available for "quality" typesetting simular to the current ability of computers and word processing we would have had several salesmen trying to sell the machine to us before 1973! In 1973 (estimate) IBM developed and began selling a production selectronic system with punch cards for repeated boilerplate that could approch the letters offered by CBS, again the systems were very expensive and highly skilled typists were trained to handle the equipment, far beyond that available in any military situation. I had been a clerk typist in the National Guard in the early to mid 60's. We did not even have electric typewriters, there was no cost justification for such equipment. Bill Appel Pong machines didn not have proportional spacing either. #48 - Posted by: Keith on September 14, 2004 09:47 AMOk....I love the memo, and I saw the list of the sponsors who supported Rather's scurrilous attack. I am willing to give up Cheerios and even take a chance at stopping my Plavix. I can suffer arthritis pain and get by without my Vioxx. No Levitra OR Viagra.....? Gimme a break. #49 - Posted by: Don Perry on September 14, 2004 02:20 PMThe ebay auction is a joke and I don't have the typewriter either, I'll take the auction down if you'd like, but hey you can't buy that kind of exposure. I added a quick attribution but the auction loses some of its humor edge if its a known link to another site. I admit to not being original but I know funny when I see it. ft88 #50 - Posted by: ft88 on September 15, 2004 03:15 PMCBS should have used Andy Rooney's old manual typewriter! #51 - Posted by: Rob on September 15, 2004 04:07 PMFrank I updated so the pic is current, with the IMAO.us tag #52 - Posted by: Joshua on September 16, 2004 12:07 AMYes, boycott the makers of Levitra and Viagra. They give millions to the Republicans. That'll show them. #54 - Posted by: T Bailey on September 17, 2004 09:45 AMCord Blood - Post a comment
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