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September 16, 2004
Mmm... Digital Crack!
Posted by Frank J. at 11:40 AM | View blog reactions | Comments (27)

Anyone seen Kerry lately? Has he liked dropped out of the race? Tim Blair has something about coming up with a catch phrase for him, but I've seen nothing from Kerry himself.

Then again, I've had no patience for any story other than memogate.

"Hurricane Ivan is devastating..."

"Get back to how CBS is making an ass of itself!" I yell.

"In Sudan..."

"This doesn't sound like this has anything to do with Dan Rather," I say.

Then my brother calls up and tells me, "I'm heading off to Iraq soon, and I just want you to know..."

"What does this have to do with forged documents?" I interrupt.

Man, I just can't get enough of this. It's like crack. I mean, this is the best news story ever! Nothing matches its entertainment value. I don't know how many years Dan Rather has been on the air, but he's throwing it all away to defend the most obvious forgeries in the history of forge-ology. And then there's all the attention we blogs are getting. Total blogflation - an influx of new readers for us all to share.

Also, the satire potential is unending (see this from IowaHawk and this from John Hawkins - then again, you can't swing a dead cat in the blogosphere these days without hitting a great parody at the expense of Dan Rather and CBS). I can't help but come up with more ideas myself (just stay tuned, sportsfans).

Then there's the Democratic Underground. Just when you thought the crazies couldn't get any crazier, they turn total cuckoo for Cocoa-Puffs. If anyone eventually concedes to the blatant reality that the documents are forged, he or she is called a "Rethug" or a "Freeper" regardless if the person has been posting on that site since its ungodly conception. It's like a shaken up ant farm.

This is just so much fun and such a boon for the blogosphere. When this is all over (which I hope isn't soon; keep stonewalling, CBS!), we're going to have to make a blogosphere shrine to Dan Rather and all raise our pajamas in salute to him. He has dealt a blow to the MSM by himself more devastating than anything we bloggers could have managed. I hope the room he eventually ends up in has extra soft padding on the walls as a thank you.

Rating: 0.5/5 (1 vote cast)

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27 Responses To "Mmm... Digital Crack!"

Damn! first again! woohoo!
I can not wait to hear what Frank J does to Rathergate.

#1 - Posted by: bubba on September 16, 2004 11:51 AM

First?

*raises pajamas in salute*

Thank you, Mr. Rather!

#2 - Posted by: The Half-Elven Commie Slayer on September 16, 2004 11:54 AM

Ah well. :-)

Boy, all of this is just so great. Those commie MSM ppl think they're digging a foxhole to hide in, when in reality they're digging their own grave. :-)

-The Real Conservative Carl
aka The Half-Elven Commie Slayer

#3 - Posted by: The Half-Elven Commie Slayer on September 16, 2004 11:56 AM


The sad thing is that it's not a political story. Seriously. That would have been much clearer if Dan Rather had suddenly found photos proving the Moon landing was fake that were made in photoshop. He would be out on his ass the day after.

#4 - Posted by: Blacknimbus on September 16, 2004 12:08 PM

Have you seen on Drudge how bad Rather's ratings are now? In NYC, he lost to reruns!

#5 - Posted by: prolix on September 16, 2004 12:10 PM

I *definitely* do not want to see you "raise your pajamas" Frank!

#6 - Posted by: KBiel on September 16, 2004 12:12 PM

No where have I seen any journalist report where Rather has violated one of the big "rules of journalism"...

Rather has become the story...

When the reporter becomes the story it's time to give up.

#7 - Posted by: Faith+1 on September 16, 2004 12:14 PM

Can I raise my nightie?

#8 - Posted by: Susie on September 16, 2004 12:19 PM

An idea for the blogoshpere shrine:

Picture of a bunch of bloggers in a circle and wearing different styles of pajamas and bunny slippers sitting in recliners with laptops in their...uh...laps. In the middle of the circle is a low coffee table. On top of the table is Dim Rather crying like a little girl wearing a French maid outfit and dancing to "I'm a little teapot" In the background the boggers are yelling "Again b*tch!"

#9 - Posted by: FormerHostage on September 16, 2004 12:23 PM

Yup, I'm f*cked like a five dollar whore on nickel night!

#10 - Posted by: Dan Rather on September 16, 2004 12:29 PM

Blather admits there may be a problem with the authenticity if the memo.

They were traced to being faxed from Kinkos....

lol

#11 - Posted by: Joshua on September 16, 2004 12:30 PM

I'm almost positive that the Dan Rather comment is a forgery.

#12 - Posted by: Wolf's Dawn on September 16, 2004 12:53 PM

Yes you may Susie, but only if you post the pics

#13 - Posted by: bubba on September 16, 2004 12:56 PM

Frank J. I went to the democratic underground site and tried to read one of their posts, but you have to be a registered user to do that and I will be DAMED in HELL before I will EVER register onto such a site. how were you able to read them ? Does this mean you are already damed to hell ? if so could you post some of them?

#14 - Posted by: Algen on September 16, 2004 01:06 PM

I'm glad I'm not the only one!! I listen to Rush, Hannity, and then the local guys and then check Drudge 15 times a day and it's STILL not enough!! I need Rather fixes all day long!! Were my parents like this during Watergate?? I'll have to ask.

#15 - Posted by: jonag on September 16, 2004 01:18 PM

Algen,
You don't have to be registered to read the posts. I'm not registered and lurk all the time.

#16 - Posted by: Frank J. on September 16, 2004 01:24 PM

I'VE FIGURED IT OUT!

I was remembering how during the 2000 election coverage I kept thinking, "gee, Dan Rather has totally been chewing on a big chunk of crack." So I went here to try to remember some of the mind-bogglingly idiotic things he had said.

Down toward the bottom, I found this quote:
"If California is the big burrito and Texas is the big taco, then Florida is the big tamale....and right now, it's the only tamale that counts."

And then it hit me! I've heard a similar stupid analogy before! It was here, of all places - IRAQWARWRONG!

Can you believe it? IRAQWARWRONG HAS BEEN DAN RATHER ALL ALONG!!! It makes perfect sense! The inane analogies, idiotic ranting, misspelled words, kindergarten education... the mask is off!

#17 - Posted by: Beo on September 16, 2004 02:18 PM

It's highly amusing, all this commotion about Rather and the memos. And I find it interesting that their ratings are seriously suffering from it.

#18 - Posted by: 007 on September 16, 2004 02:22 PM

Submitted for your amusement: I would have sent it to Allahpundit, but I've seen your drawings.

http://cowboyblob.blogspot.com/2004/09/dan-rather-retirement-watch.html

#19 - Posted by: cowboy blob on September 16, 2004 03:18 PM

I posted this to Donald Sensing but thought to add it here. I hope you don't mind:

It should have died hereafter;
There would have been a time for such a word.
To-morrow, and to-morrow, and to-morrow,
Creeps in CBS News Division from day to day
To the last syllable of recorded time, And all our yesterdays have MSM fools The way to Xeroxed death. Out, out, brief memo!
News but a walking shadow, a poor player
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage
And then is heard no more: it is a tale
Told by a Rather, full of sound and fury,
Signifying nothing.

My daughter posted this:

Now is the winter of our discontent
Made glorious summer by this sun of New York;
And all the clouds that lour'd upon our campaign
In the deep bosom of the memo buried.
Now are our brains bound with stocking caps;
Our pajama bottoms hung up for monuments;
Our stern bloggings changed to merry meetings,
Our angry listening to delightful laughter.
Grim-visaged votes hath smooth'd his wrinkled front;
And now, instead of mounting xeroxed memos
To fright the souls of conservative adversaries,
He cowers weaker in an old lady's chamber
To the lascivious pleasing of a TV.

#20 - Posted by: David on September 16, 2004 04:43 PM

God yes, it is so addictive, the thought of all those female bloggers in their, oh wait...uh...erk!...reboot..of wondering what inane comment will next come out of CBS. It's almost as surreal as one of Frank's "In my world" satires. Dan boy not only is not only sinking CBS news but seems to be dragging Kerry down with him. I can see him being lead around by the leash to his dog collar while Ann Coulter wearing shades,a short black nighty, and high heel bunny slippers spanks him with a riding crop and taunts him.....erk.

#21 - Posted by: toad on September 16, 2004 05:15 PM

God I home Chomps doesn't decide to devour him, he could die of food poisoning or somthin.

#22 - Posted by: toad on September 16, 2004 05:18 PM

What the heck is a "freeper"?

#23 - Posted by: Mr. Blue on September 16, 2004 05:44 PM

"Free Republic", er, "-er."

#24 - Posted by: Beo on September 16, 2004 06:19 PM

They may or may not be forged, but that son-of-a-bitch still didn't show up for his physical. Do you hear me? HE DIDN'T SHOW UP FOR THE DAMN PHYSICAL!!! HE'S HITLER!!! DON'T VOTE FOR HIM!!!

#25 - Posted by: Dan Rather on September 16, 2004 06:37 PM

That was Dan Lather! (get it?)

#26 - Posted by: jonag on September 16, 2004 11:18 PM

Hey! No dead cat swinging please...

#27 - Posted by: Desert Cat on September 17, 2004 01:33 AM
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