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November 10, 2004
The New Attorney General
Posted by Frank J. at 06:36 PM | View blog reactions | Comments (24)

So, Alberto Gonzales is the next Attorney General. He better be loco, if you know what I mean. Ashcroft made the liberals frothing at the mouth mad, and anyone less extreme in the AG position will be seen as a victory to them. I was really hoping Bush would nominate either Dirty Harry or the Punisher - people who would go after criminals with no regard to the law. I guess Janet Reno really set a high bar; rumors had it that, if someone questioned her, she'd lift him into the air and crush his head between her two mighty palms.

I still shudder when I think of her.

Rating: 1.8/5 (2 votes cast)

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24 Responses To "The New Attorney General"

FIRST!

#1 - Posted by: Katie on November 10, 2004 06:41 PM

He's a good guy, but libs will call it a success because he is pro-choice. And some far right groups are already bitching about him being pro-choice. But last I saw, the Attorney General's office wasn't in the business of changing or enforcing abortion statutes. So no one should really care if his abortion stance is "no abortions, not even for rape and incest," "free state-sponsored abortion on demand for underage minors in the third trimester without parental notification," or anything in between.

IT'S. NOT. ALL. ABOUT. ABORTION. PEOPLE!

The only question we should have is: will he support the killing of terrorists dead? Early signs point to yes.

#2 - Posted by: Gullyborg on November 10, 2004 06:46 PM

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/in_depth/americas/2004/vote_usa_2004/administration_guide/default.stm

Bad news, they are saying we are going to lose Rummy next term. Pretty much redoing the whole cabinet, we'll see how it turns out.

#3 - Posted by: Bingo on November 10, 2004 07:02 PM

don't trust the bbc any further than you could comfortably crap it.

#4 - Posted by: Gullyborg on November 10, 2004 07:19 PM

Meh, i feel the same way, but this isnt the kind of article thats subjective.

#5 - Posted by: Bingo on November 10, 2004 07:55 PM

Bingo, you are being a complete doofus. That "article" is just a bunch of sourceless opinion boiled down to single paragraphs (sometimes single sentences) of "and he/she will probably quit."

How many times did "experts" tell us that Bush was going to dump Cheney and put McCain or Powell or Rice on the ticket?

Learn to ignore the non-facts.

#6 - Posted by: Gullyborg on November 10, 2004 08:07 PM

Gonzales was the source of the memo stating that the Geneva Conventions don't apply to terrorists. I'm liking him already.

#7 - Posted by: siklilpig on November 10, 2004 09:37 PM

I like Gonzales. He doesn't put up with shit when it comes to these assholes. They're not obligated to adhere to the Geneva convention for them and that we can interrogate them much more vigorously than POWs.

I'm beginning to love this man.

#8 - Posted by: andophiroxia on November 10, 2004 10:18 PM

Is that the love of a man for a woman, or the love of a man for a fine cigar? Ah-hee-hee-hee-hee.

#9 - Posted by: ChrTh on November 10, 2004 10:26 PM

Hey! Just thought I'd go wildly off track here. I'm pretty much immune to DU and Kos by now, but I found one that surprised me. Not sure if it's even possible to find a way to parody it. Fisking might work better.

From Babs, no less:
"IS THIS THE MAN YOU THINK WILL KEEP YOU SAFE?"

the jaw dropper (she's the one screaming it):

8. BUSH WAS INACTIVE AND INDECISIVE FOR A FULL 7 MINUTES THE MORNING OF 9/11 WHEN INFORMED OF THE ATTACK ON THE WORLD TRADE CENTER. IF BUSH HAD ACTED QUICKLY AND INTELLIGENTLY, PERHAPS HE COULD HAVE GIVEN AN ORDER TO SHOOT DOWN THE PLANE HEADED TOWARD THE PENTAGON AND SAVED THE LIVES OF THOSE WHO WERE KILLED.

http://barbrastreisand.com/statements.html#wemusthavepatience

#10 - Posted by: Bill on November 10, 2004 11:12 PM

Two things:

1) Arafat is dead. Really. We mean it this time.

2) What happened to Bush is actually a typical response in a crisis situation; we discussed how individuals can sometimes 'freeze' when a crisis occurs in my MBA-level Crisis Management course. I asked my Prof if W was an example of this, and she thought it might be, but she couldn't be sure. The next week, she told the class that she had seen a replay of it and she indicated that Yep, that's exactly what it was (she added a snide comment about seeing him looking 'befuddled' before, and this was definitely a different look). My point? Those like Moore and Babs have obviously not taken a Crisis Management course.

#11 - Posted by: ChrTh on November 10, 2004 11:23 PM

Janet Reno is a woman!?!?

#12 - Posted by: Megan on November 10, 2004 11:25 PM

ARAFATS DEAD!! AGAIN... i guess they made room in hell

#13 - Posted by: urban on November 10, 2004 11:28 PM

Don't be judgemental. Remember, if Matt and Trey are right, only the Mormons are going to heaven. Oh yeah, and Saddam, after Satan makes a deal with God.

#14 - Posted by: ChrTh on November 10, 2004 11:32 PM

By, my above statement is better read as follows:

"we discussed in my MBA-level Crisis Management course how individuals can sometimes 'freeze' when a crisis occurs."

That should be less confusing.

#15 - Posted by: ChrTh on November 10, 2004 11:34 PM

Uhhh... I guess that's a good point, ChrTh, but am I the only one who finds her comments completely devoid of any thought of the actual circumstances?

I mean, the first plane hit at 8:45am. So Babs is critizing the President for what he did or did not do by 8:52am. The second hit at 9:03am. Now this was the morning of 9/11. For all we knew the first was pilot error. At 8:52am on 9/11 terrorism was what happened in Israel, not America. We no idea what was going on, that more than one plane was hijacked, any of that stuff. And Bab's criticism of Bush is that after the first plane hit, within seven minutes he didn't order the AF to start shooting down commercial airliners. Doesn't that strike anyone else as slightly... excessive?

#16 - Posted by: Bill on November 10, 2004 11:38 PM

Ding dong, the fish is dead! The wicked fish is dead!

#17 - Posted by: beo on November 10, 2004 11:42 PM

Bill: You're right, and we're in agreement. W had no idea what was happening at that point, and to take definitive action would be foolhardy.

In the end, the idiot versus crisis face is more of a contradiction to F9/11 than Babs' comment.

#18 - Posted by: ChrTh on November 10, 2004 11:48 PM

John Kerry said that after the second plane hit--when it was clear that we were at war--he and his senate buddies sat around in shock, unable to do anything, until the 3rd plane hit the pentagon and the capitol was evacuated.

he is a man of action.

#19 - Posted by: Gullyborg on November 10, 2004 11:52 PM

And in addition to Arafat being dead, some more hopeful news: the folks at DU are having fits of sanity. Now granted, they had to qualify it with the idea that Sharon and Bush are much worse, but their take on the thing is that they're glad Arafat's dead and they're wondering how he likes hell. Who would've guessed?

#20 - Posted by: Bill on November 11, 2004 12:01 AM

Is it okay to do a happy dance when a murdering terrorist dies?

What does the Book of Tobit say about this?

#21 - Posted by: prolix on November 11, 2004 12:19 AM

I'm hoping the Book of Tobit (revised) says its ok for me to have danced outside in the street and hand out kosher candy... Otherwise, I have something for confession, but I don't really feel repentant about it right now.

#22 - Posted by: jchock on November 11, 2004 12:26 AM

Well it say's in the book of Nostril Heinous that "One should not fuck with the Gonzo General of Attorneys, or he will cut you man!" This is clearly a warning about the new Attorney General.

#23 - Posted by: toad on November 11, 2004 01:51 AM

W nominated Alberto Gonzales for AG because of his initials. I think I like the guy. The 1st thing he did was make sure a known terrorist is d-e-d dead. *dances happily*

#24 - Posted by: McWert Deglieb on November 11, 2004 06:08 AM
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