|
About IMAO Giving money to Frank J. makes you happy! ![]() Buy funniest book ever! ![]() IMAO Podcasts IMAO Merchandise and Newsletter
![]() Cool shirts, mugs, stickers, and what-not!
About IMAO
If you want to send something by snail mail, e-mail with subject "P.O. Box" to get mail information for Frank J. and SarahK. About Frank J. Bloggers: Frank J. Harvey RightWingDuck Cadet Happy spacemonkey Laurence Simon SarahK Popular Categories
Fred Thompson FactsJohn Edwards Fabulous Facts lolterizt IMAO Condensed Know Thy Enemy Editorials Frank the Artist In My World Other Content
Ode to ViolenceBrief Histories IMAO Audio Bits ![]() Read the Essay Own the Shirt Peace Gallery Search IMAO
Testimonials
"All quotes attributed to me on IMAO are made up... including this one."
-Glenn Reynolds "Unfunny treasonous ronin!" -Lou Tulio* "You, sir, are a natural born killer." -E. Harrington "You'll never get my job! Never!!!" -Jonah Goldberg "In the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth. And He did despair, for in His omniscience, He did know that His creations had but three-fifths of the splendor of that which would be IMAO." -No One of Consequence "A blogger with a sense of humor." -Some Woman on MSNBC Blogroll
Ace of Spades HQThe Anti-Idiotarian Rottweiler Blackfive Captain's Quarters Classical Values Conservative Grapevine The Corner The Daily Gut (with Jim Treacher!) Dave in Texas Eject! Eject! Eject! Electric Venom Hot Air Puppy Blender La Shawn Barber's Corner Michelle Malkin Pereiraville Protein Wisdom Rachel Lucas Right Wing News Scrappleface Serenity's Journal Townhall Blog IMAO Blogroll Bad Example Cadet Happy The Flying Space Monkey Chronicles mountaineer musings Right Wing Duck ![]() This Blog Is Full of Crap Fred Thompson Links Fred File Blogs for Fred Fred Thompson Facts Awards
|
January 07, 2005
UN Letters from the front
Posted with utter humility by guest blogger RightWingDuck. Friends. Sometimes in our rush to laugh at the United Nations for being so utterly useless, we forget that it is composed of people serving and doing their very best. I came across this letter the other day that I think reminds us of what's truly important in life. I will continue to post these wonderful letters as I find them. UN Letters from the front. My Dearest Claudette: It has been 24 hours since we landed on this horrible island full of water, dread and misery. No French cuisine anywhere. No opera. No Jerry Lewis festivals playing at the theatre. Oh the humanit. How I long for the wonderful Paris shore. But I have a duty to you and to the United Nations. So here I remain. Today, we were issued our Toyota Land Rover vehicles. There was a problem at the dealer, but we told them the Americans would be forking over some cash soon. However, all is not good. How can they send us to this mission without the tools we need to carry them out? Of course, for this, we can only blame Monsieur Bush. My Land Cruiser is missing a CD player. I had all my favorite Jerry Lewis routines recorded onto a CD and now what am I supposed to when I’m driving around looking and listening for survivors? Not that I can hear anything with that incessant sound of the U.S. Navy helicopters. Really, the Americans love all that military technology, they can get several thousand sailors anywhere in the world in a day or so – you’d think they’d invent a more silent helicopter. I'm sure they do it to annoy us. My bed is a twin size, when I ordered a King. I said,” I want I Roi size”. They thought I was trying to talk like an American Marine. 'Urah', indeed. Not to mention the fact I forgot to pack my favorite slippers. I’ll have to send my little houseboy out to find me some. I can’t imagine that all of the stores are closed for business. Surely they knew we were coming. I’ll write more later, cheri. I must turn in for the evening. We have a day full of meetings, and more meetings. After that, our chef will be preparing a lovely Thai dinner in honor of our host nation. Give everyone a kiss and make sure you complain to everyone about the horrible Americans here in Thailand. ** Let us remember these fine people in the UN. Let us continue to pray for the survivors and they can continue to survive until help gets to them.
10 Responses To "UN Letters from the front"
Ichiban!! #1 - Posted by: Bob in Feenicks on January 7, 2005 06:48 PMni! second..how embarrasing..CURSE YOU BOB FEENICKS!! still, pretty funny..nice work duckie...one day you will take over imao..and we will all laugh at frank..what a loser #2 - Posted by: Settra on January 7, 2005 07:20 PMThird! Or should I say 'turd' in honor of the Diplomad! #3 - Posted by: AnAverageAmerican on January 7, 2005 07:23 PMSorry, Duckster. Humor requires both truth and exaggeration to be effective. This one lacks exaggeration ;-) #4 - Posted by: Harvey on January 8, 2005 02:21 AMSo Kofi Aman wants one billion dollars to keep the UN in out of there so rescue can proceed uninterupted? #5 - Posted by: toad on January 8, 2005 08:47 AMVery touching. More please. #6 - Posted by: Silk on January 8, 2005 09:33 AMFor full screen copy and paste. http://homepage.mac.com/demark/tsunami/1.html #8 - Posted by: McWert Deglieb on January 8, 2005 09:57 AMThe many. The loud. the UNiweenies. #9 - Posted by: Dave in Texas on January 8, 2005 03:11 PMPerfect. #10 - Posted by: Wil on January 8, 2005 09:06 PMPost a comment
|
Buy IMAO T-Shirts
![]()
![]()
IMAO T-Shirts
The IMAO T-Shirt Babe (winning picture) YOU BUY NEW SHIRTS NOW!!! Yay! Books!
Capitalism
Archives
By Category
24American Idol Aqua-Adventures Barackalypse Now Best of IMAO 2002 Best of IMAO 2006 Bite-Sized Wisdom Editorials Election 2008 Filthy Lies Frank Answers Frank Discussions Frank on Guns Frank Reads the Bible Frank the Artist Fred Thompson Facts Friday Cat-Blogging Fun Trivia Hellbender Hellbender Take Two Hillary Clinton Terrible Truths Humor I Hate Frank If I Were President ignis fatuous IMAO Condensed IMAO Exclusives IMAO for the Non-Deaf IMAO Reviews IMAO Think Tank In My World In My World - Fan Fiction John Edwards Fabulous Facts Know Thy Enemy lolterizt Michael Moore Mitt Romney Ads News Round-Up Newsish Fakery No, McCain't Our Military Permalink Contest Precision Guided Humor Assignments Ron Paul, Ron Paul, Ron Paul Ronin Profiles Ronin Thought of the Day SarahK's TV stuff Scary Evil Monkey Simpsons Trivia Songs & Poems State of the Frank Report Superego Totally True Tidbits WEsistance Is Facile Why Me Laugh? Yvonne's Ashes By Month
December 2008September 2008 August 2008 July 2008 June 2008 May 2008 April 2008 March 2008 February 2008 January 2008 December 2007 November 2007 October 2007 September 2007 August 2007 July 2007 June 2007 May 2007 April 2007 March 2007 February 2007 January 2007 December 2006 November 2006 October 2006 September 2006 August 2006 July 2006 June 2006 May 2006 April 2006 March 2006 February 2006 January 2006 December 2005 November 2005 October 2005 September 2005 August 2005 July 2005 June 2005 May 2005 April 2005 March 2005 February 2005 January 2005 December 2004 November 2004 October 2004 September 2004 August 2004 July 2004 June 2004 May 2004 April 2004 March 2004 February 2004 January 2004 December 2003 November 2003 October 2003 September 2003 August 2003 July 2003 June 2003 May 2003 April 2003 March 2003 February 2003 January 2003 December 2002 November 2002 October 2002 September 2002 August 2002 July 2002 March 1933
|