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January 27, 2005
IMAO EXCLUSIVE!!! SEN. TED KENNEDY BANNED FROM THE CAPITOL!!!
Posted by Frank J. at 02:26 PM | View blog reactions | Comments (11)

MUST CREDIT IMAO!!!

I have just heard from the fire marshal in D.C. that Senator Ted Kennedy has been banned from the Capitol since the size of his head violates fire safety regulations. The marshal also had to add, "Kennedy is a big fat drunk and I hate him."

Right after the ruling, Kennedy was fished from a nearby river to get a response. Those who heard him said his immediate reaction was a bunch of incoherent mumblings with a thick Bostonian accent.

BIG SCOOP!!! MAKE SURE TO CREDIT IMAO!!!

Rating: 2.0/5 (2 votes cast)

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11 Responses To "IMAO EXCLUSIVE!!! SEN. TED KENNEDY BANNED FROM THE CAPITOL!!!"

I sent it to the Chicago Sun times... They said you have been credited like no other...

#1 - Posted by: AJ on January 27, 2005 02:33 PM

How did they get his head out of his @ss so that they could measure it?

#2 - Posted by: SCSIwuzzy on January 27, 2005 02:59 PM

HA! Kennedy is a big fat drunk and I hate him!

#3 - Posted by: stewy on January 27, 2005 03:03 PM

Fished from a nearby river eh? Have there been any personal secretaries who have gone missing in the last 24 hours as well?

#4 - Posted by: Oddybobo on January 27, 2005 03:23 PM

what ever happend to the happy dance, did I miss the post? Frank quit stalling and give us what you promised.
Dont make me shake my fist at you.

#5 - Posted by: Secret Operative on January 27, 2005 03:48 PM

"err uh...err uh...I resemble er uh resent that remahk"

#6 - Posted by: BFTK on January 27, 2005 04:06 PM

Just looking at this guy makes me puke, but watching him slowly go insane is fun.

#7 - Posted by: trainer on January 27, 2005 06:12 PM

Give him 2 more years and he'll explode like an overbaked sperm whale. That is the last time I will ever mention Ted Kennedy and sperm in the same sentence. Unclean. Unclean.

#8 - Posted by: Nickie Goomba on January 27, 2005 06:42 PM

Jabba the Ted. "Hua hua hua hua...silly Wookie. Rum is for Ted."

#9 - Posted by: Steve on January 27, 2005 09:47 PM

The true fire hazard is the dangerous combination of that much flamable lard and alchohol vapors. He is like mumbling, incoherant napalm. A differnt sort of dumb bomb. And even a laser designator on his nose and control fins up his butt wouldn't make him smart.

#10 - Posted by: Chris Van Dis on January 28, 2005 09:41 AM

That damn Kennedy, he has been at it again!:
Truck plunges into ravine but this time he left someone alive. He must be getting soft in his old age.


Also in the news (inserting shameless plug here): Tests confirm: Ted Kennedy is Douchebag

#11 - Posted by: Pluto's Dad on January 29, 2005 10:41 PM
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