HUGE SCOOP!!! MUST CREDIT IMAO!!!

In the Saturday NYTimes, Doug Wead revealed he had taped a conversation with the then to be President George W. Bush. The most famous excerpt form that conversation probably is this:

I wouldn't answer the marijuana questions. You know why? Because I don't want some little kid doing what I tried.

Only IMAO has gotten its hands on the tapes to show the quote in its full context.

WHAT FOLLOWS IS AN IMAO EXCLUSIVE!!! MUST CREDIT IMAO!!!

BUSH: Now, Gore gave an answer, Weadie, but I wouldn't answer the marijuana questions. You know why? Because I don't want some little kid doing what I tried. It's the same reason I never talk about how I murdered hookers. I don't want kids to start thinking you're supposed to murder hookers after you’ve finished your business with them.

WEAD: So you're not going to say anything about how wild your life was before you became a born-again Christian?

BUSH: No, I don't think that will help anyone. Let's say I told everyone how I tried to assassinate the pope - and people do crazy things when they're young - but, if I did admit to that, then some kid is going to say, "Hey, the president tried to assassinate the pope; I guess it's okay for me to try." Who wants that, Weadnik? It's like when I murdered DEA agents and ran drugs for a Columbian drug lord, I would occasionally "sample" the product. I'm not going to talk about that. I don't want kids to point to the president and think its okay to steal from drug lords like that; if I were as wise as I am now, I would honor that contract and deliver all the drugs entrusted to me. That's the principles I want kids to get from me.

WEAD: What about things people are already talking about, like possible gaps in your National Guard service?

BUSH: Sure, Weadie, as most people suspect, I did go AWOL from the National Guard, had my face surgically altered to make me look Asian, and then fought along side the Viet Cong. I won't be like Gore, though, and just nonchalantly admit to it, because I don't want kids copying me. It's not like I'm trying to hide anything; it's just it would break my heart to see faux-Asian Communists out there because kids are imitating me.

SUPER LUCKY BIG SCOOP!!! YOU CREDIT IMAO NOW!!!

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