 |
|
|
|
About IMAO Giving money to Frank J. makes you happy!  Buy funniest book ever!  IMAO Podcasts IMAO Merchandise and Newsletter
 Cool shirts, mugs, stickers, and what-not!
About IMAO
If you want to send something by snail mail, e-mail with subject "P.O. Box" to get mail information for Frank J. and SarahK. About Frank J. Bloggers: Frank J. Harvey RightWingDuck Cadet Happy spacemonkey Laurence Simon SarahK Popular Categories
Fred Thompson FactsJohn Edwards Fabulous Facts lolterizt IMAO Condensed Know Thy Enemy Editorials Frank the Artist In My World Other Content
Ode to ViolenceBrief Histories IMAO Audio Bits  Read the Essay Own the Shirt Peace Gallery Search IMAO
Testimonials
"All quotes attributed to me on IMAO are made up... including this one."
-Glenn Reynolds "Unfunny treasonous ronin!" -Lou Tulio* "You, sir, are a natural born killer." -E. Harrington "You'll never get my job! Never!!!" -Jonah Goldberg "In the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth. And He did despair, for in His omniscience, He did know that His creations had but three-fifths of the splendor of that which would be IMAO." -No One of Consequence "A blogger with a sense of humor." -Some Woman on MSNBC Blogroll
Ace of Spades HQThe Anti-Idiotarian Rottweiler Blackfive Captain's Quarters Classical Values Conservative Grapevine The Corner The Daily Gut (with Jim Treacher!) Dave in Texas Eject! Eject! Eject! Electric Venom Hot Air Puppy Blender La Shawn Barber's Corner Michelle Malkin Pereiraville Protein Wisdom Rachel Lucas Right Wing News Scrappleface Serenity's Journal Townhall Blog IMAO Blogroll Bad Example Cadet Happy The Flying Space Monkey Chronicles mountaineer musings Right Wing Duck  This Blog Is Full of Crap Fred Thompson Links Fred File Blogs for Fred Fred Thompson Facts Awards
|
March 14, 2005
Italian Attack in Iraq
Hello, Aquafans. Giuliana Sgrena, Commie Italian reporter, was fired on by Marines on March 4th. She says she was targeted, and we know the Marines and their penchant for targeting journalists. Still, nothing has been concluded in this case and no evil-doers have been brought to justice. So, are Marines really targeting law-abiding Commie journalists? This sounds like a job for...
Yes, I swam through the gulf into Iraq where I put on my best Italian disguise and obtained a truck to drive. I then headed to where the incident had occurred. Since there were varying reports saying that the truck was either going 25mph or 100mph, I kept alternating it between the two speeds. Instead of being shot at, though, a Humvee soon pulled up next to me and stopped me. "What the hell are you doing?" a Marine asked. "Ima Italinao journaisto justa driving downa the road," I answered, with my perfect imitation of an Italian, "Are you gonna shoota me?" "What's with your shirt?" the Marine asked, "It looks like it was made from skinned goldfish." "Maybe ita was," I answered, "So, you gonna shoota me and stoppa me from reporting?" "Are you implying we shoot innocent people?" the Marine asked, looking angry. Other Marines soon backed him up. They now looked ready for violence. "Uh, maybe we cana settle this bya seeing who cana hold his head in a bucket of water the longest." When I regained consciousness, I was missing my only fake Italian mustache and was lying in a dumpster in some unknown Middle Eastern town. Well, I guess that proved Marines are violent towards Italian journalists. Score another one for the greatest superhero of all. This is Aquaman, signing off. 12 Responses To "Italian Attack in Iraq"
So what you are saying, Aquaman, is that our brave Marines were able to hold their heads in a bucket of water longer than you. What a pitiful excuse for a super hero. God bless the American troops! #1 - Posted by: Elvenbane on March 14, 2005 03:51 PMHey hey hey! Yo, Acqua di Gio-ker, looks like those marines left you with a permanently dislocated NECK! What's up with that?!? Death to the infidel. #2 - Posted by: Fatwa Albert on March 14, 2005 03:58 PMaquaman, you can't fool me. I listen to NPR! they said that you should kill all the marines. #3 - Posted by: sponge bob square pants on March 14, 2005 04:05 PMputz. #4 - Posted by: Laura on March 14, 2005 04:17 PMDear Aqua-paisano My veal parmesan isn't turning out right. I think the problem is, I can't afford veal. So I'm substituting with goldfi... er, other stuff. What should I do??? struggling gourmet in Fish, Ga. #5 - Posted by: krakatoa on March 14, 2005 05:16 PMHahaha! Love the mustache. #6 - Posted by: Ann on March 14, 2005 05:44 PMDitto on the mustache Dude, with that moustache Aquaman could at best pass for a travelling circus' Mr. Strongman... of course even Mr. Everydayman could kick Aquaman's ass. #8 - Posted by: Francesco Poli on March 14, 2005 07:46 PMDo do do - do the Mario-er... Aquaman! *does 'The Aquaman' dance, then proceeds to magically get fired for incompetence* #9 - Posted by: Mitsurugi on March 15, 2005 12:09 AMHey Aquaspaz...bet the marines really put a choke chain on you, put a pair of pink woman's underwear on your head and put you on the bottom of a pyramid of Iraqi's... Now that's a picture I'd pay money to see!!! #10 - Posted by: Littl Stevie on March 15, 2005 07:18 AMGood stuff!!! Very Funny!!! Loved the accent!!! #11 - Posted by: Littl Stevie on March 15, 2005 07:24 AM Funny, except that it wasn't Marines that lit up the Eyeties. Aquaman should know better since the Corps is well known as Soldiers of the Sea. Post a comment
|
Buy IMAO T-Shirts 
 
 
IMAO T-Shirts
The IMAO T-Shirt Babe (winning picture) YOU BUY NEW SHIRTS NOW!!! Yay! Books!
Capitalism
Archives
By Category
24American Idol Aqua-Adventures Barackalypse Now Best of IMAO 2002 Best of IMAO 2006 Bite-Sized Wisdom Editorials Election 2008 Filthy Lies Frank Answers Frank Discussions Frank on Guns Frank Reads the Bible Frank the Artist Fred Thompson Facts Friday Cat-Blogging Fun Trivia Hellbender Hellbender Take Two Hillary Clinton Terrible Truths Humor I Hate Frank If I Were President ignis fatuous IMAO Condensed IMAO Exclusives IMAO for the Non-Deaf IMAO Reviews IMAO Think Tank In My World In My World - Fan Fiction John Edwards Fabulous Facts Know Thy Enemy lolterizt Michael Moore Mitt Romney Ads News Round-Up Newsish Fakery No, McCain't Our Military Permalink Contest Precision Guided Humor Assignments Ron Paul, Ron Paul, Ron Paul Ronin Profiles Ronin Thought of the Day SarahK's TV stuff Scary Evil Monkey Simpsons Trivia Songs & Poems State of the Frank Report Superego Totally True Tidbits WEsistance Is Facile Why Me Laugh? Yvonne's Ashes By Month
December 2008September 2008 August 2008 July 2008 June 2008 May 2008 April 2008 March 2008 February 2008 January 2008 December 2007 November 2007 October 2007 September 2007 August 2007 July 2007 June 2007 May 2007 April 2007 March 2007 February 2007 January 2007 December 2006 November 2006 October 2006 September 2006 August 2006 July 2006 June 2006 May 2006 April 2006 March 2006 February 2006 January 2006 December 2005 November 2005 October 2005 September 2005 August 2005 July 2005 June 2005 May 2005 April 2005 March 2005 February 2005 January 2005 December 2004 November 2004 October 2004 September 2004 August 2004 July 2004 June 2004 May 2004 April 2004 March 2004 February 2004 January 2004 December 2003 November 2003 October 2003 September 2003 August 2003 July 2003 June 2003 May 2003 April 2003 March 2003 February 2003 January 2003 December 2002 November 2002 October 2002 September 2002 August 2002 July 2002 March 1933
|
AQUAMAN DISGUISED AS AN ITALIAN!!!
Stumble It!
