About IMAO



Giving money to Frank J. makes you happy!


Buy funniest book ever!





IMAO Podcasts
IMAO Merchandise and Newsletter

Cool shirts, mugs, stickers, and what-not!

About IMAO
Then conquer we must, for our cause is just, 
And this be our motto--'In God is our trust.' 
And the star-spangled banner in triumph doth wave 
O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave.


If you want to send something by snail mail, e-mail with subject "P.O. Box" to get mail information for Frank J. and SarahK.

About Frank J.

Bloggers:
Frank J.
Harvey
RightWingDuck
Cadet Happy
spacemonkey
Laurence Simon
SarahK

Popular Categories
Fred Thompson Facts
John Edwards Fabulous Facts
lolterizt
IMAO Condensed
Know Thy Enemy
Editorials
Frank the Artist
In My World
Other Content
Ode to Violence
Brief Histories
IMAO Audio Bits


Read the Essay
Own the Shirt
Peace Gallery
Search IMAO
Google
Web www.imao.us
Testimonials
"All quotes attributed to me on IMAO are made up... including this one."
-Glenn Reynolds

"Unfunny treasonous ronin!"
-Lou Tulio*

"You, sir, are a natural born killer."
-E. Harrington

"You'll never get my job! Never!!!"
-Jonah Goldberg

"In the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth. And He did despair, for in His omniscience, He did know that His creations had but three-fifths of the splendor of that which would be IMAO."
-No One of Consequence

"A blogger with a sense of humor."
-Some Woman on MSNBC
Blogroll
Ace of Spades HQ
The Anti-Idiotarian Rottweiler
Blackfive
Captain's Quarters
Classical Values
Conservative Grapevine
The Corner
The Daily Gut (with Jim Treacher!)
Dave in Texas
Eject! Eject! Eject!
Electric Venom
Hot Air
Puppy Blender
La Shawn Barber's Corner
Michelle Malkin
Pereiraville
Protein Wisdom
Rachel Lucas
Right Wing News
Scrappleface
Serenity's Journal
Townhall Blog

IMAO Blogroll
Bad Example
Cadet Happy
The Flying Space Monkey Chronicles
mountaineer musings
Right Wing Duck
SarahK & Cadet Happy snark TV
This Blog Is Full of Crap

Fred Thompson Links
Fred File
Blogs for Fred
Fred Thompson Facts
Awards



 

July 18, 2005
Say What?
Posted by RightWingDuck at 07:42 PM | View blog reactions | Comments (14)

Life is truly funnier than anything I could make up. Michelle Malkin details a program in San Bernardino, California that will bring back Ebonics. Yep, that be right.

As far as propsosals go - this is a Three Bong Idea.

However, it still makes for great entertainment.

I'd like to present a class room scene 2 years into the future.

CLASS AT SAN BERNARDINO 2007

Mrs. Thomas: Class, settle down please. Y'all be settlin' down now. We need to be learning us our Job Interviewin' skills.

Barbara: Mrs. Thorton, may I ask a question?

Mrs. Thomas. You can be axin' once you can axe proper.

Barbara: (sigh) I say, what we be doing this for, beyotch?

Mrs. Thomas: Because, Barbara, one day you funna getch you a job interview. You can't be having the man thinkin' less of you. They standards are different. You need to be knowing this.

Barbara: Yes, but will they say when I have no mastery of the English language?

Mrs. Thomas: What, did you go all cracker on me?

Barbara: Sorry.

Mrs. Thomas: If the language you be usin' ain't completely proper, don't sweat. Remember, you also have math skills you funna use.

Barbara: Beyotch, you made us burn our math books. You said, "they be racist."

Mrs. Thomas: Well, you right. Remember, it's not the color of yo skin, it's the content of your character.

Barbara: So, you sayin' I should develop my character?

Mrs. Thomas. Shiiiiii- no. Let Whitey work on his.

**

Ladies and Gentlemen, at no point in my life did either of my parents insist that the way for me to succeed in America would be for others to lower their standards. Succeed in dating - yes. But not in business and definitely not in real life.

It bothers me to read articles like this. Truly it does.

If the San Bernardino school district is going to implement a program like this - I would like to offer other suggestions that will also be culturally appropriate.

RWD's Suggestions for Racially Sensitive Education - Needs & Requirements

Mexicans.

Switchblades. We need switchblades. Sure, some of you people might feel they are dangerous, however these little pieces of steel are essential in our everyday communication. How can one properly say, "I'll cut you man" if one is using a paperclip. This is a denial of my right to free speech.

Smaller Buses. Hey, i grew up packing 10 people into one sedan. When you take my child on a bus and put her two to a bench, I feel you have no awareness of our past and history.

Also

Pick your own grapes day. There is no better way for you to respect the Latino community than to show you honor their contribution to society.

Eastern Indians

Chairs: School crowding and cultural awareness dictate that we make Indians sit on the floor.

Bathrooms. India has a poor infrastructure. We recommend that toilets be washed once a month - preferably by one of the "untouchable" students. The lower income students may be issues buckets which may be then empties onto the White Boy Football Field.

Homework assignments. Since the other culturally aware classes are falling behind, it is only fair that we outsoure the extra homework to these students. Make sure their grade - like their future salaries - are 1/5 of the American Students.

American Indians.

Like Columbus, we tend to confuse these people with the regular Indians. Just apply the same standards and invite them to the Rain Dance once a year.

**

There. I hope I didn't be forgettin' nobody.

Rating: 2.8/5 (16 votes cast)

Email This | Add to del.icio.us | Digg this | StumbleUpon Toolbar Stumble It!
 

Buy IMAO T-Shirts


IMAO T-Shirts

The IMAO T-Shirt Babe
(winning picture) YOU BUY NEW SHIRTS NOW!!!
Yay! Books!





Capitalism
Archives
By Category
24
American Idol
Aqua-Adventures
Barackalypse Now
Best of IMAO 2002
Best of IMAO 2006
Bite-Sized Wisdom
Editorials
Election 2008
Filthy Lies
Frank Answers
Frank Discussions
Frank on Guns
Frank Reads the Bible
Frank the Artist
Fred Thompson Facts
Friday Cat-Blogging
Fun Trivia
Hellbender
Hellbender Take Two
Hillary Clinton Terrible Truths
Humor
I Hate Frank
If I Were President
ignis fatuous
IMAO Condensed
IMAO Exclusives
IMAO for the Non-Deaf
IMAO Reviews
IMAO Think Tank
In My World
In My World - Fan Fiction
John Edwards Fabulous Facts
Know Thy Enemy
lolterizt
Michael Moore
Mitt Romney Ads
News Round-Up
Newsish Fakery
No, McCain't
Our Military
Permalink Contest
Precision Guided Humor Assignments
Ron Paul, Ron Paul, Ron Paul
Ronin Profiles
Ronin Thought of the Day
SarahK's TV stuff
Scary Evil Monkey
Simpsons Trivia
Songs & Poems
State of the Frank Report
Superego
Totally True Tidbits
WEsistance Is Facile
Why Me Laugh?
Yvonne's Ashes
By Month
December 2008
September 2008
August 2008
July 2008
June 2008
May 2008
April 2008
March 2008
February 2008
January 2008
December 2007
November 2007
October 2007
September 2007
August 2007
July 2007
June 2007
May 2007
April 2007
March 2007
February 2007
January 2007
December 2006
November 2006
October 2006
September 2006
August 2006
July 2006
June 2006
May 2006
April 2006
March 2006
February 2006
January 2006
December 2005
November 2005
October 2005
September 2005
August 2005
July 2005
June 2005
May 2005
April 2005
March 2005
February 2005
January 2005
December 2004
November 2004
October 2004
September 2004
August 2004
July 2004
June 2004
May 2004
April 2004
March 2004
February 2004
January 2004
December 2003
November 2003
October 2003
September 2003
August 2003
July 2003
June 2003
May 2003
April 2003
March 2003
February 2003
January 2003
December 2002
November 2002
October 2002
September 2002
August 2002
July 2002
March 1933