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August 08, 2005
Feed the Poor Talent
Posted by RightWingDuck at 10:29 AM | View blog reactions | Comments (25)

truecharity2.jpg

Hola!

My name is Pedro and my family came here from Cuba. We tried to make it to Florida, but the ocean waves pushed us out to sea and we eventually made it to New York City. New York City is the greatest city in the state of New York. We love it!

I'd like to talk do you about a charity that makes a difference. A company that is dedicated to taking back from the community and giving it to those who need it. Are we talking about the poor? No, I'm talking about Air America and corporations like them that desperately need our help.

Every year, corporations steal from Boys & Girls Clubs like mine. Do youkknow how to tell if they are taking our money?

Top Signs Your Corporation is stealing from the Boys and Girls Club...

10. Laptops looks suspiciously like Speak 'N Spells

9. Break room suddenly has a large supply of Graham Crackers.

8. You called Tech support because of the mysterious crash of your Etch a Sketch.

7. PowerPoint presentations are done with fingerpaints.

6. You suspect that the phone voice mail shouldn't greet people with "Yabba Dabba doo."

5. or have Dino The Dinosaur instead of a pound key.

4 The budget includes a line item called "lemonade sales."

3. Your New Business Stationery only has 4 lines. With little dotted lines in between.

2. Business Motto is "We can make even more lunch money."

And the number one way to tell your company is stealing from the local Boys And Girls Club...

1. Your Corporate fleet now includes a Big Wheel.

But these are the signs of an EVIL cororation. Sometimes, corporations can do very good work.

That is why you have not heard any complaints from the New York Times, which is in no way biased. In fact, you should read their hard hitting new series, "25 ways Bush is worse than Satan" with an introduction by Al Franken.

In fact, that is my topic today....

Truecharity1.jpg


Al Franken has done so much for the community of poor people.

Just the other day, his limousine drove by a group of my friends , and he threw a hamburger out the window. Good thing the limousine was starting to slow down. Anyway, not only is my friend Carlos expected to make a full recovery, but he now has a hamburger patty embedded in his forehead. Some kids struggle with hunger - Carlos will always be fed - thanks to Senor Franken.

So won't you please hit our tip jar today?

For only a large amount of money, you can help pay his salary. Sure, you could use that money to pay for college, or buy a Toyota Corolla, but instead - you could use it to support the poor people at Air America.

Remember. When evil companies steal from the poor, they err, and they err badly. When a company steals from a Boys And Girls Club, that's Air America.

Give. And give more. Senor Franken will tell you when you have paid your fair share.

Update: Welcome Michelle Malkin readers (Thanks Michelle!) We've got some funny stuff here. Stay a while and check the place out.

Rating: 3.8/5 (2 votes cast)

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25 Responses To "Feed the Poor Talent"

That should be "Senor Franken", shouldn't it?

Funny stuff, Ducky. : )

#1 - Posted by: GradualDazzle on August 8, 2005 10:39 AM

Yeah, I was just going to say that too... (about the whole "Seņor Franklin" thing... that's not quite right). Ducky, you should write top ten lists for late night shows... yours are way funnier. :) Of course, they might not appreciate the conservative bent, but who cares?

#2 - Posted by: Janna on August 8, 2005 12:26 PM

Name has now been corrected.

At least I know you guys read to the very end.

#3 - Posted by: RightWingDuck on August 8, 2005 01:30 PM

I love Al Franken and Howard Dean. They make what we do so much fun.

#4 - Posted by: spacemonkey on August 8, 2005 10:29 PM

Maybe we should organise a blog-telethon, or 'blog-a-thon' for the poor people at Air America. Except we'll then steal the money raised from Air America and give it to a Boys and Girls Club.

#5 - Posted by: Vox Poplar on August 9, 2005 08:46 AM

So, let me get this straight; Boys and Girls Club is funded by Government grants, which are funded by all of the tax-payers, and the money goes to a lefty radio station that decries Capitalism. A siphon is a tube that a thief uses to steal gas from your car. Sometimes they swallow it and then throw up!

#6 - Posted by: Tom T. Bosee on August 9, 2005 08:56 AM

Don't we already do that with NPR and PBS? Just without the Gloria Wise handling fee?

#7 - Posted by: 2klb_o_fun on August 9, 2005 09:53 AM

dang, wish I had thought of this... too funny!

#8 - Posted by: dave on August 9, 2005 10:12 AM

You missed a "Franklin".

#9 - Posted by: Hal E. Burton on August 9, 2005 10:25 AM

Brillinat stuff, truly, you just made my must read list!

#10 - Posted by: Fred on August 9, 2005 11:06 AM

Can anybody help me start a radio network based in Atlanta? We have a Boys and Girls club, too.

#11 - Posted by: Marvin on August 9, 2005 11:17 AM

Good thing he wasn't eating soup!

#12 - Posted by: jonag on August 9, 2005 09:33 PM

(wiping tears from eyes)

Who's chopping onions!

#13 - Posted by: Mort Mortenson on August 9, 2005 09:54 PM

Wow! You all sure sound scared of little old AAR. I thought we wouldn't make it a year. I am assuming that you are all unaware that people are dying in an illegal war, out civil liberties are being slowly erased by our modern day Hitleresq leader. But no, all you fu**ers have to talk about is a bunch of "lefg wing wackos." You all deserve to rot in the prison cells of Abu Graib prison. Sad, sad, sad

#14 - Posted by: Joe smith on August 9, 2005 11:20 PM

Scared? We are entertained by AAR, or rather by their scandals.

You guys should make it to year two. Provided there are enough boys and girls clubs.

Keep that unhinged hatred. We'll need that to win in 2006.

#15 - Posted by: RightWingDuck on August 9, 2005 11:54 PM

Unhinged hatred? Sounds like you enjoy drinking the Kool-Aid...you and Hannity are roomies aren't you. My point...you mental fuzzball...was that there are so many other important things to owrry about and you direct your efforts at a bunch of left wing talkers. With all the money Halliburton and Bush have stolen/wasted, we could have built 10,000 Boys & Girls clubs.

Seems that the "haves and the have mores" have selective memory about the illegal money that has flowed in & out of the White House and the Bush pockets. Lets be consistent here..if it is good for the GOP, it's good for the DEM's and vice versa.

Enjoy the war, and all the mayhem it has caused. I am sure that Christ will be so proud to let the minions of all you God fearing war mongers into his kingdom. And, by the way...prepare to got waxed in 06 & 08...your time is up.

#16 - Posted by: Joe Smith on August 10, 2005 12:32 AM

Joe Smith, how's that whole "hate Bush" thing working out for the left? Did well for you last November, and worked again in Ohio. Please keep it up, we're looking for 70 senators and 300 congressmen by '08.

Remember, take a deep breath, think nice thoughts, heck have a latte or even a beer, and remember after a good night's sleep.......

Bush will STILL be president in the morning...... It must really suck to be a lefty.

Ed R-

#17 - Posted by: Edward on August 10, 2005 12:59 AM

Hmmm. Kool Aid. I like what you're drinking. It has such a good effect on you. Nice. Thoughtful. Sweet.

I appreciate your comments. Your ideas are as original as your name.

You are right. Let's be consistent. How about a LITTLE press coverage on this issue?

Nah. Who needs it. Besides, we're tired of illegal wars, too. In fact, for the next one, we're going to apply for a permit. Weee.

Our time is up? 2006? 2008? Oh, yeah, I forgot, Hillary is now a conservative!

And felons may soon have the right to vote.

BTW, this Air America issue has now been seen by a few million people (no not here, we're a small site) do you think that maybe, just maybe, people are wondering why there's no coverage in the MSM?

Stay funny!

#18 - Posted by: rightwingduck on August 10, 2005 01:16 AM

I'm working down my checklist of Lefty memes and noticed that Joe missed a few; he hasn't yet accused us of being racists. The script isn't going to memorize itself, Joe!

I do appreciate the effort, though - the expletive-laden tinfoil hat monologues make it *so* much easier to identify pointless conversations before too much time is wasted engaging them.

#19 - Posted by: Devin on August 10, 2005 11:35 AM

I suppose that you all still think that Nixon committed no crime. Or are any of you old enough to remember Nixon?

Just like the rest of the Neo-Con's, you all would cout your nose off despite your face. Polls shoe daily that there are MAJOR problems with Bush's policie, both foreign and abroad.

I am not really sure why I am reciting facts, all you GOP followers do is repeat the same thing over and over. You pay no attention to facts or logic. Bush says jump and you all start hopping around like a bunch of lemmings.

Sacarfice your family members as I have done with 3 of my 4 sons. What have you sacraficed Duck, Edward Devin??? I served my Country and so has my family.

as for the elections, I guess you all believe that there were absolutely problems with any of the elections right? Kind of helps when Diebold and local leader are in with the GOP.

You all sit blindly by and keep mistaking debate, facts and disagreement with "hatred" for your blessed leader. I will wager all of you right now that when the Dems take back the country, all of you will say and do the same things that you all accuse us of doing now.

Why don't you try something new like looking at the facts objectively and making an assessment that does not include blindly spewing what someone has told you? I know, it's hard work and you have to use soem brain cells. try it, it's liberating!

#20 - Posted by: Joe Smith on August 10, 2005 08:32 PM

Why don't you try something new like learning to spell? or use expressions that actually exist (it's cut your nose off to spite your face)? or "recite" actual "facts" instead of your opinion on nameless polls that you assert exist without linking? Polls incidentally have proven their worthlessness more and more over the past 20 years.

Besides, actually read this blog, and those on the blogroll and you'll find that they constantly challenge Bush's policies. The overwhelming support the Minuteman Project recieved here is just one example.

Also, I'm having trouble believing your name is Joe Smith, since that's the name on every dumbass kid's fake I.D.

#21 - Posted by: Tristan on August 11, 2005 02:30 PM

Such language Tristan...are we to believe that your foul-mouthed ratings about a few typo's and the origin of my name is all you can find to debate about???? What's with all the blind hatred??? Did I hit a nerve and challenge some of your belief systems...do you even know what belief systems are?

Since we are on a grammar kick, "Besides, actually read this blog, and those on the blogroll and you'll find that they constantly challenge Bush's policies," is not only a run on sentence, it is a sentence fragment and you have a comma splice.

As for the polls; your precious Faux News channel, along with the MSM, all have the same news to report. Bush is failing the polls regarding his job rating, support for Iraq and the economy. Just for my own curiosity, how many polls did you look at, quote or link to that involved Clinton? Of course, polls are invaluable when they are used against the person/party you want to fail right? As for linking you to polls, if you are so ignorant that you do not research, read, listen to or analyze multiple news sources then you are truly part of the problem.

So, what have we learned here today?
1) You avoid a challenge to you belief system by analyzing my spelling and the origin of my name.
2) Polls that do not show you what you want to see are inaccurate. By the way, link the article that you got you information regarding poll accuracy...or are you just spewing more GOP garbage?
3) You offered no insight into any of my points. I guess we are to assume that you have nothing but vulgarity and hatred to offer...right?

Here is a link for you:

Just for you

Enjoy the facts. After you are done digesting some truth, go wash you mouth out with a wire brush.

#22 - Posted by: Joe Smith on August 11, 2005 11:24 PM

What are "foul-mouthed ratings"? Why did you use the possessive on "typo's". It should read "typos". I'm just trying to help you. You begin to lose your credibility when you sound like a high school dropout.

#23 - Posted by: cmbdds on August 13, 2005 12:47 AM

On a final note, I would like to point out that as soon as everyone was presented with facts, the debate stopped.

You all need to quit blindly following a leader and realize that that blind loyalty leads to disaster. Read your history.

I want to thank all of you for participating in a social experiment where I was able to prove my hypothesis with absolute clarity. And, for whatever it's worth, my doctoral thesis will be grammatically and phonetically correct.

Joe Smith (and yes, that is my real name).

#24 - Posted by: Joe Smith on August 14, 2005 02:14 PM

Joe, Joe, Joe

My dear boy. You must lighten up, it is only in jest. I have listen to AAR and I can say Poor ole Al is pretty funny in some respects as is Rush. I don't nessacarly agree with Al's personal politics. As for Bush's senseless war, how quickly liberals forgot Clinton's unnessacary military actions. Does Bosina, Croata, Kosovo, Hattie come to mind???? As for 2008, if the wicked witch from New York runs I am afraid the Americans are just stupid enough to just vote for her. Myself I would sooner trust a double headed rattlesnake than this woman. I would rather sleep with a rattlesnake than this woman. I too am also perturb about this war in Iraq, I just wish Bush would just stop trying to be mister nice guy and just give the military the orders to just "kill all of them and let god sort them out". This would really get the liberals screaming bloody murder in this country. "Frankly my dear, I don't give a damn".

#25 - Posted by: Will on August 23, 2005 01:49 AM
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