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August 23, 2005
A Story, Bit-by-Bit
Superego: Part 15 - Humor
Posted by Frank J. at 02:21 PM | View blog reactions | Comments (7)

PREVIOUS

"So will you proceed unarmed, Officer Rico?"

Dip had started calling me "officer." I decided to ignore it. "What do you think?"

"You seem to dislike being without guns. I also think that, if you are found to have weapons, you'll probably kill the witnesses. That won't be very police officer like of you."

I was about to give Dip an odd glance, but then I remembered he was just a voice in my ear. I was taking a few armaments with me - guns, explosives - and, yes, I would kill the Detective and any other officers around if my weapons were discovered. But, they would only be discovered if I had to use them, which meant I had been placed in a dangerous position where I had no option but to shoot back at some criminals. So, if I had to kill the Detective on that matter, it would be for her own incompetence.

"Officer Rico, this seems like a lot of effort to get a little information."

"I just think I'm going to be needing that information, Dip. I have the feeling Gredler is involved in something big, and things just aren't adding up."

"Maybe you should have me do the adding; I'm very good with math."

That was enough. "Dip, are you being stupid, or are you trying to make jokes?"

"The latter. I took what you meant metaphorically and treated it literally. I understand with some jokes..."

"Why are you trying to be funny, Dip?"

"You have been very hard to get input from, thus, using a random number generator, I've decided to try different things to see if they suit you better. It does seem like you could use more humor, Rico."

I just grunted in response as I picked out a coat. It had been warm out, so I needed one I could conceal everything with while not making myself too hot. "Dip, how is the extraction plan going?"

"I have a new plan which I rate to have approximately a 23.847% chance of success. Do you like the number? I made it more computer like instead of a nice round number."

"I don't care how many decimal spaces you give me, Dip; I need a much better plan."

"As for your own plan, what happens if you are unable to gain Detective Thompson's trust to get the information from her?"

"What do you think?"

"I think you will drag her into a dark alley, beat the information out of her, and then kill her - probably with a blaster so you won't get a mess on yourself."

That was almost eerie. Dip really did seem to be making an effort to understand me. "You're beginning to think like a hitman, Dip."

"That makes an interesting irony: for the Detective to live, she has to be naive enough to trust a psychopath."

I put on a nice light jacket. "Live longer, at least."

"I think you should revisit my conclusion that you are evil, Rico."

"I told you I don't have time for that; too much work to do to indulge your learning algorithms."

"Do you really think you'll be able to find the terrorists, Officer Rico?"

"A killer in search of killers - it just might work." I had a keen eye - that's how I survive - and it seemed I should be able to do this... or at least impress the Detective enough in the attempt. Then maybe she could help me find out why this hit seemed so odd. I still couldn't quite place my finger on exactly what disturbed me so much, but I think I might actually be... scared.

Is that possible?

"Rico! Knock. Knock."

"Shut up, Dip."

NEXT

Rating: 2.3/5 (12 votes cast)

Superego
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