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November 03, 2005
Top Ten Reasons Given for Rioting in France
As you know, there are riots going on in France. I decided to research the issue and find the reason for the riots, and, oddly enough, there were ten in number: TOP TEN REASONS GIVEN FOR RIOTING IN FRANCE 10. Unable to afford wine for their children. 9. France's "free healthcare" is a kit containing a band-aid and a shot of whiskey. 8. Grueling thirty-hour work week doesn't leave enough time to brood. 7. Decided it was time to take French rudeness to the extreme. 6. Too much American cultural imperialism and not enough Monopoly game pieces at the local McDonald's. 5. Someone tawt he taw a German. 4. Current leader not arrogant enough. 3. First they make you wash hands after going to the bathroom, next they make you take showers. 2. The elite are hogging all the smelly cheese. And the number one reason given for rioting in France... "I'm stuck living in France!" 18 Responses To "Top Ten Reasons Given for Rioting in France"
5. Someone twat he taw a German. Of all the words for the spellcheck to miss... #1 - Posted by: Army NCO Guy on November 3, 2005 03:47 PMfist #2 - Posted by: first on November 3, 2005 03:47 PMfist? ?!? Watch out Frank, they're after you! #3 - Posted by: Beolaf on November 3, 2005 03:56 PM5. Someone twat he taw a German. Better edit this before SarahK sees it... #4 - Posted by: Editor2 on November 3, 2005 04:08 PM3. First they make you wash hands after going to the bathroom, next they make you take showers. When did the French ever require showers? #5 - Posted by: Hellbilly on November 3, 2005 04:09 PMWell, how do you phonetically spell what Tweety Bird says? #6 - Posted by: Frank J. on November 3, 2005 04:09 PMTook care of it myself; proper spelling is "tawt". #9 - Posted by: Frank J. on November 3, 2005 04:12 PM9. France's "free healthcare" is a kit containing a band-aid and a shot of whiskey. Whiskey? Mon dieu!!! Cognac!! Marc!! Whiskey is le imperialisme culturale Americain, or something like that! #10 - Posted by: Silicon Valley Jim on November 3, 2005 06:09 PMBut whiskey makes a better Molotov Cocktail. #11 - Posted by: Lily on November 3, 2005 06:18 PMThey are building an eternal flame to commemorate the anniversary of the death of Yasser Arafat. I figure Paris is as good a fuel source as anything. #12 - Posted by: Laurence Simon on November 3, 2005 07:11 PMSome observations: If there is a civil war in France, who surrenders to whom? Will Chirac be forced to use the French secret weapon aka "Red balloon of death?";) Can we expect CBS to send Dan Blather to the scene to cradle a wounded mime and scream "Whyyyyy!!!!" as he looks straight into the camera? Being in France would he be able to use his copywrited signoff phrase, "Courage.."? #13 - Posted by: Ruff on November 3, 2005 09:01 PMThe real reason didn't make your list, but it should have: Socialist government has created 25% unemployment in your group. #14 - Posted by: Assistant Village Idiot on November 3, 2005 09:02 PMThis can't be good - Chirac just appeared on TV wearing a Burka. Couldn't quite tell what the camel behind him was doing, but he seemed to be enjoying himself . . . Vive le Allah! #15 - Posted by: Brian on November 4, 2005 03:59 PM9. France's "free healthcare" is a kit containing a band-aid and a shot of whiskey. That sounds like Ted Kennedy's input on Hillary-care. Number A) We've seen the pic you posted of the french whore... that says a lot there! 2) They thought New Orleans was hogging all the attention with their precious hurricane Taco) If they burn everything, there's nothing left for terrorists to attack... SAFE! #16 - Posted by: Chris on November 4, 2005 07:42 PM#8 is my favorite!! 30 hour work week?! That doesn't even qualify as work! No wonder we rule the world!! #17 - Posted by: jonag on November 5, 2005 01:41 PM> Being in France would he be able to use his copywrited signoff phrase, "Courage.."? Well, he could, but he'd get fined by the French Language Police for not saying it in French: Post a comment
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