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February 16, 2006
So You Didn't Laugh When Cheney Hit a Kid in the Head with a Kitten?
Posted by Frank J. at 10:41 AM | View blog reactions | Comments (38)

I wrote a nice little post about how everyone loves IMAO (I even got an e-mail from a liberal today who enjoys IMAO), but then I found this comment (edited for language):

This website SUCKS!!! What a bunch of sick ronin you all are. I HATE neo-cons! Your gun worshipping is revolting. Go blow away each other in your self-righteousness. Keep a handgun with you at all times! Shoot first and ask questions later, just like dick(head) cheney did while quail hunting! Go blow up the rest of the world, go nuke them to prove how "bad ass" you really are. Yee-haw! Then kill all the liberals, kill all the socialists, kill all the Europeans (because they aren't into "intelligent design" and still prefer science (you know--the science that brought you the internet...your PC...you Mac...your chemo-therapy if you ever had cancer...etc). I just don't get you people. I think you are ruining my country. There is SERIOUS division in this country now. I think it will only get much worse in the years to come.

I'd respond to the substance of this comment, but IT'S ALL TOTALLY TRUE!

Still, this person seems unhappy. People should be happy. You, Mr. Liberal, need to be more happy. Find a grassy field on a sunny day and spend the afternoon chasing butterflies. After that, you come back and comment again. I'm sure your comment will be much more happy and make us all happy too. Then the circle of happiness goes on!

Remember, ronin, many liberals out there are just in need of a hug, so go hug them and make them happy.

IMAO accepts no responsibility for hug related mishaps. Anyone who takes advice from Frank J. is doing so at his own risk and against the advice of about any lawyer.

Rating: 2.9/5 (7 votes cast)

I Hate Frank
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38 Responses To "So You Didn't Laugh When Cheney Hit a Kid in the Head with a Kitten?"

Frank, are you sure you didn't make that comment up? The whole "ronin" thing seems like a giveaway.

Oh, and FIRST!

#1 - Posted by: SilverBubble on February 16, 2006 11:18 AM

That's the edit for language (that's where ronin first came from - me putting it in the place of vulgarity in hate mail). The unedited comment is still with the original post.

#2 - Posted by: Frank J. on February 16, 2006 11:20 AM

Frank,

Don't sweat it. This was probably written before this person was able to refill his perscription for medical marijuana.

#3 - Posted by: Wolfman Dan on February 16, 2006 11:24 AM

Frank, we need your help being happy here in Mountain View. It was below freezing at sunrise, and nearly everybody is sad. Come quickly! Be funny! The butterflies are frozen! I'm running out of exclamation points!

#4 - Posted by: Silicon Valley Jim on February 16, 2006 11:26 AM

Jim,
I'll do my best. Just give me a sec...

#5 - Posted by: Frank J. on February 16, 2006 11:28 AM

"Go blow up the rest of the world, go nuke them to prove how "bad ass" you really are. Yee-haw! Then kill all the liberals, kill all the socialists, kill all the Europeans"

Gosh...some really good suggestions. Should get started right away on this or wait until tomorrow?

I think I need to read Everybody Loves Cheney again, and I've got some clothes to wash, so let's put off nuking the world until tomorrow. But then, definetly, I'm ALL for it!!! YEE HAW!!!

#6 - Posted by: Daniel on February 16, 2006 11:36 AM

Would it be okay to hug all those unhappy liberals with nuclear arms?

#7 - Posted by: mike on February 16, 2006 12:09 PM

Finally, a dirty hippie commie leftie with some good suggestions. I say we shoot first and ask questions later, kill liberals, socialists (isn't that a bit redundant? Didn't we get them all when we killed the liberals?) and Europeans and then nuke the middle-east. after all, it appears we finally have liberal approval for doing that ... and that's all we were waiting for, approval of the enemy (or is that enema?)

#8 - Posted by: pete in Midland on February 16, 2006 12:35 PM

I'm happiest when I'm bust a few out of my 1911!!!

BTW Frank SarahK rocks the t-shirt and gun bit WTG

#9 - Posted by: on February 16, 2006 12:46 PM

yeehaw!

#10 - Posted by: sarahk on February 16, 2006 12:49 PM

//Remember, ronin, many liberals out there are just in need of a hug, so go hug them and make them happy.//

You gotta be careful hugging one of these guys though, since they don't bathe, the slime from their paranoid sweat will stick to you for weeks. Also they may attempt to sue you for "invading their personal space", you know how lawsuit happy they are, ACLU and all...

#11 - Posted by: sarasmom on February 16, 2006 12:57 PM

I'm all for making people happy but the only liberal I can bring myself to hug is my sister. (She bathes daily)

#12 - Posted by: John on February 16, 2006 01:07 PM

" Keep a handgun with you at all times! Shoot first and ask questions later, just like dick(head) cheney did while quail hunting! Go blow up the rest of the world, go nuke them to prove how "bad ass" you really are."

Well, it's a start.

#13 - Posted by: hwy93 on February 16, 2006 01:25 PM

I would love to hug some liberals.

Please come see me at your local zoo - look for the sign reading "Ursus arctos horribilis".

#14 - Posted by: Master Shake on February 16, 2006 02:57 PM

Your gun worshipping is revolting?

I thought we worshipped Jesus or maybe Bush. I'm so confused now.

I think you are ruining my country

Ruining it? You're the progressive, buster. We conservatives are trying to keep it from being changed.
And if its your country why don't I see your name on it?

#15 - Posted by: spacemonkey on February 16, 2006 02:59 PM

What's wrong with medical marijuana? That would make you happy and less likely to go on angry tirades, anyway.

#16 - Posted by: crazed dave on February 16, 2006 03:00 PM

Your country? Take a look at who has all the guns and then tell me again who's country this is...a-hole

#17 - Posted by: NukeRising on February 16, 2006 03:30 PM

But it's all totally true!

ROTFLMAO.

Best response ever to an asshat.

-ron

#18 - Posted by: ron on February 16, 2006 03:49 PM

"you know--the science that brought you the intenet...blah blah blah..."

I thought Al Gore did that...

#19 - Posted by: AlanABQ on February 16, 2006 03:52 PM

AlanABQ, are you suggesting Al Gore designed the world?

Couldn't be, because the theory is entitled "INTELLIGENT Design."

#20 - Posted by: Undercover Hippie on February 16, 2006 04:15 PM

you gotta admit, that guy had some great ideas.

#21 - Posted by: Patriot Xeno on February 16, 2006 04:26 PM

so if he hates this site.... why is he here?????

#22 - Posted by: Garrett DeMeyer on February 16, 2006 04:32 PM

Oooooh....I read the original comment. You're right, he didn't say "ronin". He's bad.

#23 - Posted by: jonag on February 16, 2006 04:36 PM

**AlanABQ, are you suggesting Al Gore designed the world?

Couldn't be, because the theory is entitled "INTELLIGENT Design."**

No, U.H., I was merely remembering Al's statement years ago that he was (somehow) responsible for the internet.

#24 - Posted by: AlanABQ on February 16, 2006 05:27 PM

"the Europeans... prefer science; you know--the science that brought you the internet..."

Not that anybody who visits this site need be reminded of it, but the internet is based on the TCP/IP Protocol suite developed by the US military during the Cold War. Not by European science, and certainly not by European communism/socialism - by the good old American Christian Capitalist ethic.

#25 - Posted by: Ursine East Facing North on February 16, 2006 05:35 PM

NUKE THE LOOON!!!!!!!!!

#26 - Posted by: BigOrangeAxe on February 16, 2006 05:40 PM

Ok, I've re-read Everyone Loves Cheney, had a good laugh, and washed my clothes. I'm ready to get started on this nuke the world bit. I say we start with Europe first since Europeans are both liberal and socialist. It's hitting three birds with one stone (or two quail and one friend for Cheney).

So who do we call to get this under way? Rumsfeld or Rove?

#27 - Posted by: Daniel on February 16, 2006 05:47 PM

I apologize that some people in my party are outside the realm of sane and have no sense of humor. I have enjoyed this blog because it is funny even if I don't always agree with the politics.

#28 - Posted by: patrick on February 16, 2006 05:54 PM

Ursine: Actually I'd say that the ARPANET infrastructure was more the product of the Roosevelt / Truman / Kennedy / Johnson Democratic Party. (Alongside the Eisenhower / Nixon faction of the Republicans who really weren't all that different.) They believed that Big Public Works were the way to safeguard America. They treated capitalism as good for providing luxuries, mainly, but were happy to raise taxes for all manner of social programs. (Not all of which were bad; I do like me some inter-web and all those weapons were kick ass.)

And as for Christianity, that was just something the rulers of the day made a fuss over to keep the masses in line. Boob bait for bubbas. Most of the big scientific discoveries were made by agnostics and (especially) Jews.

Pedantry aside, your problem, I think, lies in a mistaken projection of today's partisan divide back into the 1940-1966 WW2 / early Cold War era. Remember that the Democratic leaders were on our side then...

#29 - Posted by: David Ross on February 16, 2006 06:43 PM

Knock it off, patrick. You know it's no fun when a liberal is acting reasonable. If you enjoy the blog, just keep it to yourself.
Keep thinking, though. We'll get you someday. Mwahahahahahahahaaa!

#30 - Posted by: Shipoopi on February 16, 2006 06:47 PM

"Shoot first and ask questions later, just like dick(head) cheney did while quail hunting!"

Is Cheney trying to eliminate all former Vice Presidents or Just Danny?

#31 - Posted by: BigEZ on February 16, 2006 10:26 PM

frankj, you should just say, "raise your hand if you have a patent." what was that for again? some science-y engineering thing right? oh and did you get one of these? the place i'm currently temping at is lousy with plaques.

#32 - Posted by: maggie katzen on February 16, 2006 11:50 PM

Frank-
I have a problem with the suggestions made by the crazy Che loving leftist- I have a Smith 9mm that I love because of ease of use and the ammo is a bit more economical. I'm wondering if I should trade up to the .40 for more knockdown power. I mean some of these libs are pretty large and I certainly don't want to be under gunned. Your thoughts?

#33 - Posted by: JT on February 17, 2006 09:37 AM

And I'd still rather hunt with Cheney than go driving with Ted Kennedy.

#34 - Posted by: Nanashi on February 17, 2006 01:33 PM

Patrick, you can't be liberal and act calm and civilized while trying to say something in a way that doesn't make you look like a complete a-hole. It goes against the natural order of the liberals on IMAO.

#35 - Posted by: Joe on February 18, 2006 02:02 AM

I'm Thinking Pat's a Democrat, NOT a liberal...think of Zell Miller...there ARE conservative Democrats out there...

#36 - Posted by: sarasmom on February 18, 2006 11:54 AM

// spacemonkey: Ruining it? You're the progressive, buster. We conservatives are trying to keep it from being changed.
And if its your country why don't I see your name on it? //.

HahHAhAhhaha~!!

(My sentiments exactly.)

#37 - Posted by: Alicia on February 19, 2006 08:33 AM

hey, the lib actually has some good ideas for a change. Here's a list of the good ones:
*Gun Worshiping
*Keep a handgun with you at all times
*Shoot first, ask questions later
*Nuke the rest of the world
*Kill the Liberals
*Kill the Socialists
*Kill the Eoruopeans a third time
*Fix the division in the country by killing the liberals

#38 - Posted by: RPKLMG on February 21, 2006 11:34 AM
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