Many people think that Hollywood is out of touch with mainstream America; people who think that are crazy and stupid and full of themselves. Those who don't understand and cherish what Hollywood actors and directors bring to the important issues today are ignorant of both what's important in America and of Hollywood itself.

 Hollywood people are better than us; if you don't believe that, then you are just jealous. These people are troopers. How often has an actor had the disappointment of their personal assistant forgetting to take the crust off of his sandwich but went on to perform anyway? Sure, he threw a fit, fired the assistant, and pouted in his trailer for two hours, but these people are humans; not gods. And that makes what they do all the more impressive. Still, you want to lecture them on what's right and wrong, and you don't even have a personal assistant.

 Where in the world do you get this idea you know anything? I know where Hollywood people get their experience. They have tons of different marriages, oodles of out of wedlock children, and more drug problems than all of South America. That's real world experience that informs them better than the silly, unimportant lives you people have. And, with all these life problems plus fancy parties plus check ups with their plastic surgeons, you know they have little time to spend learning about world issues, so they spend that time well. How many political fundraisers have you been invited to? Yet you think you know anything about war or social issues better than George Clooney? Do you know how ignorant you sound when you say that?

 Still, with all this disdain you shovel upon them, they do all they can to educate you. But what do you do? You spit at it! Did you even go to see Brokeback Mountain? Ang Lee slaved on that movie to make you a better person, but you didn't want to watch it. Know why? Because deep down you know you're gay. It's true; you're gay! Yes, you'll go see Ang Lee's The Hulk because you aren't afraid that you will become large and green if angered, but you're just too afraid of the gay cowboy inside you to see a story about real love. And, if you won't even admit to you being afraid of your gayness, how can we trust anything else you say?

 Hollywood actors are rich, live pampered lifestyles, and are sheltered from consequences; this gives them a view of society that you don't have. Up on their pedestals, they have a view of the world you could never even imagine. And, when they read something on a paper, and then they go on TV and say stuff about it to make things happen. They’re important; that's why they don't like regular people making eye-contact with them. What do you do when you hear about an issue? Nothing... or you blog about it which is next to nothing. So what is Hollywood out of touch with? You and your boring life? These people don't only know the issues, they've acted in movies and TV specials about these issues. You’ve acted in nothing; you're just ignorant. I mean, what level scientologist are you? Do you even know about the threat of Xenu? I bet your precious "Jesus" didn't tell you about that one.

 So stop being a fool and worship and offer sacrifices to those in Hollywood who deign us worthy of their opinions. And, if you want to add to the debate, you show me where your Walk-of-Fame star is. Oh, you don't have one? Then you shut up!

Frank J. is a syndicated columnist whose columns appear worldwide on IMAO.us and is a frequent contributor to IMAOPodcast.com. He is also the author of such books as "I, For One, Welcome Our Hollywood Overlords" and "How to Train Your Personal Assistant (Hardcover Edition So You Can Whap Your Personal Assistant with This If He Made You Throw a Fit)".

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