We join our heroes who live in a mythical world with no relation to current reality. Our main character, Malvado, is played by Oscar winner, George C. Looney. A pretty boy with a reputation for being pretty.

We pick up the story as the misunderstood hero plots to overthrow an evil government.

Scene One. Malvado and his long haired lovely are lying in bed.

Malvado- Somehow, we must overthrow this evil Busho regime. They are up to no good.

Sluteska: Oh, darling. We must have another sex scene. Kiss me you hot crazy stud muffin.

Malvado: You are a lovely woman, but it's only the opening credits.

Sluteska: I can't help it. I wish I could quit you.

Malvado: And I wish I could do something about this evil Busho admiinistration. I'm sure at this very moment, they are plotting some evil plan to remove these peaceful religionists from our very soil. I'll call my friend Muhammed.

(Picks up phone and dials)

Mo? what are you doing?

Mo: Stop calling me. I'm plotting evil and wishing to destroy your way of life, you stupid zionist pig.

Malvado: Pig. he he. That's funny because I'm not Jewish. so it doesn't offend me. Cool. Call me when you're done. And lets get together for lunch next week. You pick the place, okay Mo?

Mo; Fine. Someplace crowded with lots of women and children.

Malvado hangs up the phone.

I'm glad I'm lberal. Otherwise, I wouldn't be able to make friends with nice people like Mo.

Now - back to our sex scene.

**

Scene two

Busho: The new security fence would cost HOW much to build? That's insane.

La Condi: The price for security, Mr. President.

Busho: Could we save money by using illegals?

La Condi: Mr. President, I have it on very good authority that the AQ is planning on striking this country in the next few days.

Busho: Hmmm. Would they be interested in helping us run our ports?

Scene 3.

Malvado: Sluteska, I might need your help in carrying out my plan?

Sluteska: Plan?

Malvado: Yes, this evil government is holding thousands of Mo's innocent friends. They're being held in small rooms, allowed to pray 5 times a day, fed with three square meals a day, and punished by being forced to read mindless hateful cartoons such as pictures of The prophet Muhammed and The Boondocks.

Sluteska: What is your plan?

Malvado: I will destroy all of these buildings in order to make a large political statement. I need your help. Many women and children will die.

Sluteska: Hey, Isn't that - like - evil?

Malvado: No - we'll be sure to remove all Peaceful Religionists.

Sluteska: So how do I help? Do you want me to stand guard over the explosives?

Malvado: No. You have to stand here and guard my haircare products. I must go to the doctor. All this Busho hatred is making me start to break out. I cannot look anything less than my best! (he flashes his dreamy smile)

Sluteska: Oh, you are so dreamy. (They kiss for a long time) I wish I could quit you!

Malvado: Remember, if I die, to share with the world the most important thing?

Sluteska: That your mother shouldn't use your death for shameless self promotion?

Malvado: No - more important than that. Make sure the world knows I do my own stunts.

Scene 4

Sergeant: Here's your food prisoner!

Abdul: How dare you depict food! It is against my religion to depict any living thing.

Sergeant: But it's FOOD! You EAT IT. I didn't give you pictures of food or anything.

Abdul: oh - and now you insult me. The people at the United Nations will hear about this. I think I am going to pass out! (pretends to faint)

Sergeant: (smiling sardonically) It's okay. We can count on the United Nations to be fair.

Scene 5.

Busho: I'm ready for my speech. Thanks for giving me these phonetic cue cards.

La Condi: This is an important speech. We need you to not sound so stupid.

Busho: No problem. (reading card) Nukaler.

La Condi: Try again. New-Clee-Er

Busho: Nuu-Ka-Ler

La Condi: Almost. New-Clee-Er

Busho: Noo-Kee-Ler

La Condi: No. No. no. New-Clee-Er

Busho: Nuu--Ka-Ler

La Condi: Screw it. I'll give the damn speech.

Scene 6

At the Senate

Democraht Leader: Before we hear today from the "Presidente" we will have a short invocation. Here's Navy Chaplain Bill Jones.

Chaplain Jones: Thank for this blessed day, Lord Jesus...

(The Democrat side of the aisle gasps in horror)

Democraht Leader: Do you have to invoke THAT name? We're not sure if that's exactly the right role for a chaplain.

Chaplain Jones: But.. but..

Democraht Leader: In the interest of tolerance, we will hearm from Imam Mammy.

Imam: Before I invoke anything, I want you to know that the evil Busho administration has done nothing but torture our peaceful people and our peaceful ways.

(Democrahts give a standing ovation)

Some of our religious leaders have been deeply, deeply traumatized. Just the other day, Imam Mohamed Al Getyu sobbed hysterically while locking himself in our humble mosque, deep in the Ammunitions Room - i mean Room of Prayer. Shame on Busho!

(another standing ovation)

Let us pray. Oh Merciful Allah. Strike these people dead where they stand. Kill them, mighty Allah. Let their blood run down these aisles while we dance with their decapitated heads in our hands. Amen.

Democraht Leader: (wiping a tear) That was beautiful. I feel spiritually refreshed. Thank you. Now I'd like to talk to you about today's headline - the United Nations Report on Abu Gabuga Prison. Here's the report titled: My best friend's sister's boyfriend's brother's girlfriend heard from this guy who knows this kid who's going with a girl who saw Hassan pass-out at Abu Gabuga Prison last night. I guess it's pretty serious."

WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO ABOUT THIS!!!!

Scene 7.

Malvado: Thanks doc for treating my skin rash. I'm so glad I'm liberal and not at all homophobic. Otherwise, I'd ask myself why a simple consultation for a rash turned into a 2 hour proctology exam.

Doctor: I wish I could quit you.

Tune in later this week for the continuation our our saga: P is for Payback.

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