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March 21, 2006
American Idol 5 Top 11 (DVR-delayed liveblog)
Posted by sarahk at 08:51 PM | View blog reactions | Comments (28)

Ryan's dressed up like he's going somewhere important, but Ryan, you're just gonna hear the Earsore sing, so big whoop.

Do I have to stress YET AGAIN that I don't like Kellie Pickler because she's a fake moron and CAN'T SING. Yes, I agree, she's hot. Big deal, so is Carrie Underwood, and I love her.

Oh wow, Taylor is wearing the suit that his dad wore to the prom many moons ago. Oh, the songs are from the '50s, that would explain it.

Simon thinks Taylor, Chris, and Kellie are going to be the top 3. That's what I read he said this weekend anyway. Lemme tell you, picking Kellie over Mandisa or Lisa or Katharine? Simon's finally had enough of Paula and stoled her vodka.

Ok, so Barry Manilow coached everyone, which is different from it being Barry Manilow songs night. So I'm ok with this.

IDOLS 01... Mandisa is singing Dinah Washington's "I Don't Hurt Anymore". She looks great, she sings great. It was a little rough at the end, but she faked it well. When she went off key, she just pretended she meant to do that. And that's what a star does. And she's a star. Even Simon loves her tonight. Uh-oh, he just called her sexy; she's soooo embarrassed by that. Good girl. I adore her. Mandiva, how cute. She's too nice to call a diva, though. That's a good thing.

IDOLS 02... Bucky is doing "Oh Boy" by Buddy Holly. His voice is still too quiet. Hair is good tonight. Still looks washed, but not curly. So he's using the Garnier Fructis conditioner but not the smoothing milk. This is boring, and he's still way too quiet. After the keychange, off-key a lot. He's definitely going to be on the bubble tonight. He really just sounds like he's trying to sing and not get heard. Simon's right, it didn't make an impression. :-(

I love HDTV. I mean, I can see allllllll of Paula's lipgloss. Really, I think on HD, they can see it in Paris.

IDOLS 03... Speaking of Paris, she's next. She's doing Peggy Lee's "Fever". Oh my goodness, what did they do to her hair? I love the dress. The earrings are all wrong. For such a classy and grownup dress, you want earrings that don't look like you made them. Shoes are great, they must be killing her. Ok, first half was extremely boring, hence the focus on the appearance. The second half was good, end was great.

IDOLS 04... When Ryan said Chris would be doing Johnny Cash, Frank and I both got excited. Anyway, he's singing "I Walk the LIne". Oooh, he's wearing black too. Eeeeee! He seems nervous, but this is great. We'd by that single. That was more exciting than Johnny Cash's version. Was that him covering someone's cover version of the song, or was it his original cover? I'm asking because I don't know, and if he came up with that, bravo. Bravo anyway.

IDOLS 05... Katharine is doing "Come Rain or Come Shine" of Ella Fitzgerald. You know, I love that she does rehearse-and-interview day in her sweats with little or no makeup. That was good. Her hair is gorgeous. I hate the dress, but she looks beautiful. For the record, she's way hotter than Kellie Pickler, and I don't hate her. I hate her song choices (usually). She was much better tonight than usual (should have left off the very last phrase if I'm being honest). I still think she can do more than she's doing, and I'm still hearing Ruben in the back of my mind. I think she's coming around, but really. Katharine, you know you can belt better than that. Please do so.

IDOLS 06... Taylor is doing Buddy Holly's "Not Fade Away". And he's wearing a hideous baby blue grey suit thingy. Cap'n Tightpants yet again (really, someone tell that kid to buy bigger pants!). First half of the song is boring. Really boring. Ok, if'n I'm being honest, that was his worst performance to date. His voice wasn't there. Oh help me, what is that face Paula is making. They really should let Simon speak, since he's the only judge who has anything useful to say.

Paula... she really just makes me tired. I loved Simon shushing her. That's how we discipline our dog. I'm not sure if it works on clap-happy seals, though. She really took the giggle juice tonight.


IDOLS 07... Lisa Tucker is going to sing "Why Do Fools Fall in Love?". Off the top of my head, I'd say bad song choice. Boring song for this show. Maybe she and Barry can pull something out. BTW, Barry is just a great musician all around. (That's not permission for AI to have another Barry-songs themed night.) You know, I'd be fine if they replaced Paula with him. Why does she wear knee-shorts on stage? Lisa, that is. She was dressed better for meeting Barry than for her performance. She has great pipes, but... I dunno, when you're trying to make everyone forget you're a kid and you already have trouble picking forgettable songs, you should try to dress less like you're going to the schoolyard for a game of four square. Man, I loved that game.

IDOLS 08... Scrappy Doo is singing "When I Fall in Love". Ok, I think he's trying to look mature? What's with the hand in the pocket? You know what's bad is that the big notes are decently on-key, while the other notes are sharp. Ok, except that one big note right near the end. That was definitely pitchy, Dawg. Ok, earlier, I was gonna bring up Jasmine and how Kellie is like her, but then I decided that would be mean. But now that they've shown her in the audience, I feel she's free game. Kellie is like Jasmine, except Jasmine was better. There, that's how awful Kellie is.

IDOLS 09... Elliott is next. Wait, how could someone who sings like Elliott not have liked Barry's music before meeting him? Silly boy. Anyway, it's good he's turned around. Say, did y'all know that Elliott and Kevin are both diabetic? It's amazing what you learn on the AI website. But lemme tell y'all, that website's not as funny as this one. Elliott's singing "Teach Me Tonight". You know, Elliott and Chris have the best voices of all the men in the contest, no question. The first part of the song was blah, but it picked up. Wasn't his best, but it was good. He has a song choice problem that he really needs to remedy.

[NUMBER STILL WITHHELD BECAUSE ETERNITY IS NOT YET OVER AND UNLIKE SIMON, I HAVEN'T LOST MY EVERLOVING MIND]... Next up, Kellie Pickler is going straight to hell, because she's going to butcher Patsy Cline. Good mama, help me not faint, who in the world has never heard "Walking After Midnight" by Patsy Cline? Were you under a rock for all of the second half of the last century, Barry? It's only slightly less well-known than "Crazy". "Because she's so young, Kellie had to be reminded what the song is about." Translation: "Kellie's an idiot." Well, she looks good anyway. I'm sure that in somebody's world, that equates to vocal talent. And oh yes, soooo many innocent country girls dance like that. Hell. Straight to hell. Do not pass go. Do not collect $200.

This show has become a nightmare. A trainwreck. I have lost all respect for Simon. Why don't they just kill Chloe while they're at it.

IDOLS 11... Ace is going to do "In the Still of the Night". My soul already hurts after Earsore, I'm not sure I can bear it. Well whaddaya know. Miracles happen. Ace didn't suck. That was actually great. He only did the falsetto for the one big note right at the end. I'm in shock, that was great. I have to give props. A couple of out of tune notes, but I mean, I'm just so shocked that he didn't suck that I might vote for him.

Vocally tonight:
Chris*
Mandisa*
Paris* - Frank thinks this was voteworthy, I don't.
Katharine* - I don't think this was voteworthy and was not as good as she could have done, but I feel guilty voting for Ace and not Katharine and Paris. They've been consistently better than him...
Ace* - But if he has sex with the camera one more time tonight, I'm taking it back.
Elliott* - His song choices have to improve or I'll stop voting for him next week. No more messing around, Elliott.
Lisa
Scrappy - I hate putting him above Taylor, but Taylor didn't even sing tonight.
Taylor - I'm sorry, I can't vote for him tonight. I can't get behind such a lazy vocal.
Kellie - I can't believe I'm saying she was better than Bucky. I must have forgotten my hormone shot. Or maybe the pit bull just beat me down too much today.
Bucky

I think Bucky has a big enough following, Taylor's not going home, and some tone-deaf folks like Kellie, so I predict Lisa goes home. I wanna hear about your pickled suntan.

UPDATE: LOL, I left out Scrappy Doo. Lemme just add him...

Rating: 2.2/5 (5 votes cast)

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28 Responses To "American Idol 5 Top 11 (DVR-delayed liveblog)"

dinah WASHINGTON young padwan -- destination moon is one of my favorite songs ever

smelly pickles -- what an idiot -- lets the microphone roll down the stairs -- and why was she done up like a french whore?

taylor was dreadful -- that probably isn't even my top 10 buddy holly songs -- yuck

bucky -- what a mess -- so-so karaoke

ryan's i walk the line -- very interesting -- it was a little rough, but had the makings of something great

#1 - Posted by: cadet on March 21, 2006 09:49 PM

I loved Chris' version of Walk the Line better than the original and I frickin' LOVE the original.

Now, I'd like to see him make a folk song like 'Rocky Mountain High' into a rock ballad.

Taylor chose a weak song tonight, and to be blunt I thought Chicken Little's performance ran up on Taylor's.

#2 - Posted by: spacemonkey on March 21, 2006 10:38 PM

Sorry, I thought Ace sucked. To be fair, this is not a show I follow so maybe he was better tonight than usual? Anyway, LOVED Walk The Line.

#3 - Posted by: BrendaK on March 21, 2006 10:48 PM

that would be CHRIS's version of I Walk the Line, young Padwan.

#4 - Posted by: sarahk on March 21, 2006 10:56 PM

Lisa is boooooring. She's cute and talented but booooring. Ace makes me nuts (not in a good way) the way he makes goo-goo eyes at the camera. Ick. Kellie is staying another week.

#5 - Posted by: jonag on March 21, 2006 11:39 PM

Ace is fabulous. I can't believe how cool he is. Not as great as Constantine, (ah! he was in the audience--he is so sexy) but he is great, nonetheless.

WHY DOES EVERYONE LIKE CHRIS?

Chris can do ONE thing. Only one. ONLY ROCK. Taking any song and making it "rock" is NOT talent.

He's "true to himself" because he can't DO anything else. They always say they want versatility, but when someone is versatile, they say they aren't "true to themselves."

It's quite annoying.

#6 - Posted by: Jen on March 21, 2006 11:43 PM

1. Chris
2. Paris
3. Elliot
4. Mandisa
5. Katherine
6. Kelly

Bucky is a goner.

#7 - Posted by: Pickaxe on March 22, 2006 12:52 AM

chris/ryan it's all the same :D
(i wonder where i got that ryan thing)

i also agree lisa is dull as dirt--i can't understand it--great singer, nice looking girl, but no stage presence

#8 - Posted by: cadet on March 22, 2006 01:04 AM

Chris's Walk the Line was very good. I'd buy that single as well. As for versatility, yeah he's not that versatile, but very few singers make a career out of versatility. Johnny Cash wasn't that versatile, either.

I'm surprised you didn't mention Kellie's no smile/fake smile entrance this evening. She had a very annoyed look on her face for about two seconds before she realized the cameras were on her, then *flash* go the pearly whites.

#9 - Posted by: Chris on March 22, 2006 07:09 AM

Chris, I did see it, but she's done that quite a few times before she knew the cameras were on her, so this time I just rolled my eyes. again. :-)

#10 - Posted by: sarahk on March 22, 2006 08:36 AM

So does Kelly even make pickles? Or is her name a fake too?

#11 - Posted by: spacemonkey on March 22, 2006 09:27 AM

Chris sounded good, but the song version isn't original. The band LIVE recorded that version a year or so ago.

#12 - Posted by: pleffnut on March 22, 2006 10:22 AM

1 Katharine - total entertainment;
2 Mandisa - great vocals and personality;
3 Ace - glad he no longer looks like he's preparing to hold up a liquor store, starting to sound good too;
4 Paris - just please don't talk so much, please;
5 Elliot - try to be more hipster, less doofus, 'kay?
6 Taylor - someone needs to put together a video juxtaposing his dance moves with Julia Louis-Drefus' moves in the Seinfeld episode;
7 Kelly - she can't keep up the nicey-nice act much longer and it will be great entertainment when that mask comes off;
8 Lisa - should have waited a couple of years to audition, the show will still be there;
9 Bucky - anyone else expect to eventually see him in a remake of Deliverance?
10 Chris - always does the same thing; and
11 Kevin - should have waited at least a decade to audition.

#13 - Posted by: Gregg the obscure on March 22, 2006 10:46 AM

Johnny Cash was the greatest!
The best I tells ya!
Everyone must go and buy My Mother's Hymn Book by Johnny Cash. It is the best recording he has ever done. (It was Johnny's personal favorite also.)

#14 - Posted by: Joshua on March 22, 2006 12:01 PM

I think someone turned off Kellie's mic just to keep her from saying stupid things... good plan, but it didn't work.

I can't stand Ace's performances... and it kills me because he is really cute. But he tries too hard to "make love" with the camera (like Constantine did last year) and it makes me feel... uncomfortable. I wish he'd just cut that out.

Kevin, Kellie, Lisa, Taylor, & Bucky were awful.

Mandisa, Paris, Chris, Elliot, & Katharine were really great! And it pains me not to put Taylor in this group because he's awesome... but his song last night was so boring... I wanted to change the channel.

#15 - Posted by: Janna on March 22, 2006 12:56 PM

What was up with that weird French pronunciation by Pickler? Best line on Television Without Pity Idol forum:

"Patsy Cline has been killed in a fiery crash yet again."

From commenter Shnuglet. Genius.

#16 - Posted by: uncle Mikey on March 22, 2006 02:41 PM

Sorry, but Chris swiped that version of Walk the Line from LIVE:

http://www.soulpatrolshirts.com/media/walktheline.mp3

The guy is unimaginative and one note. Everything he does is a cover of some alt rock version of something else. Last week he was ripping off the Chili Peppers.

I can't wait to hear his Alt Rock cover of a disco song.

If you listen to the MP3 of Taylor's performance last night, you'll realize it was way better than it seemed. It also bears repeat viewing. I was unimpressed the first time I saw it, but I got into it the second time when I rewatched the show for my review.

http://www.soulpatrolshirts.com/media/notfadeaway_idol.mp3

#17 - Posted by: James Hudnall on March 22, 2006 03:00 PM

Sorry, but that Walk the Line cover was note for note a swipe from Live's version just as last week, Chris aped the Chili Peppers. He's a good singer, but an unoriginal one. Too many weeks of this will kill him on the show when more people get wise.

I wasn't crazy about Taylor's song, but when you rewatch it it comes off much better. It was the best performance of the night, if not the song, and the best 50s themed performance. Mandisa was second, followed by Paris. Mandisa was the best singer of the night.

Either Lisa, Bucky or Eliot will be gone tonight.

#18 - Posted by: James Hudnall on March 22, 2006 03:56 PM

from the little i've watched of the finals, it's hard to imagine i actually thought the contestants this season were good from the little i watched of the semis. mandisa's the only one that's any good, and maybe katherine (who is way hotter than kellie, I agree). and occasionally chris, although i don't think he belongs on the show. everyone else can get off my television.

man, taylor sucked again, but at least he wasn't the Most Annoying Man on Earth tonight. for once. and this is got to be up there on the list of paula's Most Drunken Performances. wow.

#19 - Posted by: me on March 22, 2006 04:13 PM

forgot paris in the "not hideously awful" group above. although I do hate how they (the show, not paris) exploited her family connections in the auditions, that seems like an unfair advantage. that, and she's got the same name as the capital city of france.

elliot and lisa also don't make me want to kill them (and I don't mind scrappy too horribly much either, but he's fron the same mold of the kiddie brigade that made season 3 suck so much. of course, so are paris and lisa)

#20 - Posted by: me on March 22, 2006 04:18 PM

Listening again to Taylor's Not Fade Away, I'm reminded of one of my long standing AI complaints. The sound balance seems all wrong.

I don't know how much control the competitors have, but it seems as if the band is often too loud compared to the singer, so that many singers sound as if they have to strain to not be overwhelmed by the band.

#21 - Posted by: BritAm on March 22, 2006 04:32 PM

I agree on the sound balance. For some reason several singers sounded muted compared to others. Almost as if they were handicapping them.

#22 - Posted by: James Hudnall on March 22, 2006 04:52 PM

Funny thing....I actually thought that Kellie Cucumberpreserver sounded pretty good on Walking After Midnight...and maybe Barry M was smoking crack a lot and had just forgotten about Patsy Cline.

Taylor sounded good, but he should have tried something more challenging. The crowd ate it up though.

Chris should be taken out and shot for messing with Johnny Cash, he may not have been from Texas, but Arkansas is close enough, so "DON'T MESS WITH TEXAS! I mean with ARKANSAS!"

Not shot and killed though, just wing him or something....

Please bring back Mandisa, Paris, Taylor and Chris, and let that cute brunette girl serve drinks or something.

The other ones should be home deciding who to vote for.

#23 - Posted by: Steve on March 22, 2006 05:28 PM

Before yesterday I had never seen AI. My boyfriend tries to watch it and I make him shut it off. Well, because of SarahK's posts, curiosity got the best of me and I just had to see the dreaded Kellie Pickler for myself. Now, I don't know much about singing, but that girl MURDERED a beautiful song. Had she ever heard of Patsy Cline? It was like she just yelled the lyrics rather than singing them. Anyway, that took care of it. I'll never need to watch it again.

#24 - Posted by: kya on March 22, 2006 05:57 PM

Simon said, "It's like watching a high-school musical" Well OF COURSE IT IS!!! THESE SONGS ARE FROM THE 50'S!! WHAT DO YOU WAAAAAANNNNTTTTTTT????? (HELP! CANT TURN OFF CAPS. oh, there we go). Anytime you do a bunch of songs from the 50's it's going to sound like a sock-hop.

And Steve, I gotta disagree with ya, "dog". Chris' performance was second only to Mandisa (who could probably sing the names in the phone book and rock the house!) He took a chance with an all-time classic song, and did a great job! And as far as what one person said, that Chris can only sing rock: well, yeah. Everybody has there own style. Just sayin'.

#25 - Posted by: BigOrangeAxe on March 23, 2006 05:13 PM

But other people can branch out of their comfort zone, whereas Chris is --quite possibly-- physically inable to sing anything other than his brand of "rock."

All of his performances sound the same. They are interchangable. People are going to catch on sooner or later.

#26 - Posted by: Jen on March 23, 2006 08:50 PM

Thank God! I thought I was alone in my disbelief of Kelli Pickler. Not for a moment do I believe she is a dumb as she acts. I detest females who play the "dumb helpless" female bit. And Ace makes me want to retch, I thought he did a terrible job and those looks into the camera??? BLEECH!

#27 - Posted by: Lisa on March 24, 2006 01:44 PM

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#28 - Posted by: Nicole Ginges on March 28, 2006 05:47 PM
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