The .50 Beowulf would be great for Manatee!! Do they taste good? If not, there really would be no point. But if they do taste good, let's go huntin'!!

www.50beowulf.com

Today the world received the happy news that the gentle manatee appears to be well on the road to recovery due to its removal from the state’s endangered species list. They gentle aquatic mammal, also known as the dugong, plies the shallow coastal waters of Florida. Manatees taste very much like chicken and go by the scientific name of propellerus attracti mutilatto. A humorous historical note reveals that what once many drunken, horny sailors mistook the gentle giant for mermaids.

Personally I can only imagine Teddy Kennedy, who while not a sailor certainly qualifies as horny and drunk, pitifully trying to pick up one of these dugongs at the docks of any of his numerous watering holes along East Florida's IntraCoastal Waterway. Indeed, while it may seem laudable to do whatever possible to see that this gentle sea slug propagates and avoids extinction, no one seems too concerned at what price these noble efforts exacts on society. The impact on boaters is almost unbearable. Much of Florida's waters can no longer be sped through by expensive, powerful speedboats, not to mention the damage it does to the props when one comes in contact with them. One might think that Mother Nature would have taught these gentle, bobbing clowns of the sea to duck, or maybe swim a little deeper.

Finally, Patrick Rose, an official with the Save the Manatees Club, said that down listing could weaken protections and decrease government funding and cause the world to think that the manatees are doing a lot better when they are in fact not. I think the Messr. Rose’s concerns revolve around what could result as a new addition to the endangered feces list, namely snotty, underemployed and overpaid members of the Save the Manatee Club. If indeed the manatee is doing better, what the hell do we need to fund the Save the Manatee Club for? Jimmy Buffet will have more time to make money, and seafood shacks in Florida can offer a new menu item.

And that’s the way it is.

“Who held the baby manatee for ransom?” “Squidnappers.”

I'm amazed at you barbarians who are talking about using heavy firearms on manatees.

Manatees should be harpooned, not shot. If you shoot 'em, they just sink.

We use heavy firearms on everything.

Just shoot it first, than figure out what the hell it is.

If one of these ugly things is called a "sea cow", is a group of them called "sea cattle"?

Let's do something that will benefit others and the U.S. Let's get those starving children commercials off the television airwaves, so we can view more commercials about products we don't need but will buy anyway to support comedy writers.

Herd all the manatees over to the African coast ( or whatever coast is nearest to the country with the most starving population at the time), open up on the aquatic bovine with the caliber of your choice, and let's feed those poor, hungry children.

Talk about stimulating our economy by creating new jobs!!!

New website idea: SEA CATTLE RANCHER UNIVERSITY ONLINE!

Yeaaaahhh.

Look for the package of Manatee Helper™ on your favorite grocer's shelf. It's right next to the Spotted Owl Helper™.

Micheal Moore hunting season has officially opened!

I can see the headline now.

Michael Moore severely injured by boat propeller while basking in inland estuary.

Humor is one thing, but let's not insult the manatee with these Michael Moore comaprisons!