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July 05, 2006
A Story, Bit by Bit
Hellbender: Part 11 - The Personal and the Professional
Posted by Frank J. at 02:04 PM | View blog reactions | Comments (9)

BEGINNING OF STORY

PREVIOUS (PART 10)

* * * *

Bryce quickly ducked into an alleyway for cover with Lulu and Charlene following; Charlene pulled along Doug, who had reacted to the shooting by standing still and looking around with confusion.

"That was a warning shot!" yelled a voice that Doug recognized as the goonette he had failed to hit with a pipe.

"They always say that when they miss," Charlene said.

Lulu frowned. "I didn't think we'd be getting shot at this early."

"It's goons," Doug said. "They're after Bryce. I hit one in the head with a pipe, but the other got away and came back, I guess."

"Goons?" Charlene sighed and moved to the edge of the alleyway exit. "Anyway, I spotted four of them in an old store front... one with a rifle. Give me a gun and I'll take care of them."

"No guns." Bryce pulled Charlene back and placed himself nearer the end of the alleyway. "This is a personal matter completely unrelated to our mission... well, mainly unrelated. Anyway, I'll handle this." He turned to face out of the alleyway without exposing himself. "Hey! Sharon! Let's try to resolve this peacefully before it ends in a way that we both regret!"

"Shannon," Doug corrected him.

Bryce thought for a moment. "Are you sure?"

More bullets struck the edge of the alleyway, spraying pieces of concrete everywhere. "You don't even remember my name?" Shannon shouted.

"Well... I'm bad with names... always have been, really. Still, I think we can be professional about this. I know that your boss wants me alive."

"Yes, but we don't!" answered a different female voice.

Bryce looked worried. "Charlene, did you happen to notice if all four were women?"

"Didn't get a good view, but they could have been. What's this all about?"

Bryce ignored the question. "This could be bad."

"You said you love me!" yelled a third female voice.

Bryce was sweating. "Well... uh... in my defense... um... I thought it was clear from the context that I only said that to get you to sleep with me."

Doug covered his ears in anticipation of more gunfire. After the bullets hit the wall and pavement outside the alley, Charlene turned to Lulu. "You see who we've gotten involved with?"

"That's why I'm in charge."

Doug tapped Bryce on the shoulder. "You know, you've occasionally gotten normal women to try and kill you, so maybe you should be more careful around women hired to kill people."

"At least I'm getting some action, Doug, so shut up."

"Enough." Charlene reached in Doug's jacket and pulled out his gun. She then leaned out of the alley and fired off a shot.

"That almost hit me in the head!" Shannon screamed.

Charlene looked at the pistol in her hand with distaste. "I need something more accurate for this range."

"That was a warning shot!" Bryce shouted to the jilted goons. "I'm currently with a bunch of heavily armed mercenaries, so maybe this isn't the best time to talk."

Lulu moved towards the alleyway exit. "This is Madam Liu, leader of the mercenary group..." She turned to the others and whispered, "We really need a name for our new mercenary group."

Doug knew the answer to that one. "Hellbender."

"Ooh! I like that!" Lulu faced the alleyway exit. "...the mercenary group Hellbender! Don't make us kill you... because we really will. If you have a problem with Bryce, why don't you get together and put your thoughts down in a letter and mail that to him. You'll feel a lot better afterwards."

Charlene rolled her eyes. "You really told them."

"This isn't over, Hellbender!" Shannon shouted back. "You've gained the wrath of Dante Ridge by protecting Bryce, and we'll see you all dead!"

"Okay. Toodles." Lulu leaned out of the alleyway to take a look. "I think they left. See. I saved us all; that's why I'm the leader."

Charlene glared at Bryce. "Dante Ridge! Isn't he the biggest crime lord out there?"

"Well, that varies by what measure you go by. I mean... physically, he isn't the biggest."

Charlene grabbed Bryce and placed her pistol barrel at his chin. "What have you gotten us into?"

"Nothing! To do the necessary research to get us this mission, I had to get some information from some existing criminal organizations. I might have stepped on a few toes and had personal relations with a few female goons, but that's my problem. I'll take care of it."

Lulu pulled the two apart. "Calm down, Charlene, or I'm taking away the gun. I think it's pretty cool that we already have an enemy when we've only been a mercenary group for a couple minutes. Go Hellbender!"

"This isn't a game, Lulu! And what in the world does 'Hellbender' mean?"

"It's a type of salamander," Doug explained. "I saw the name once in a book and thought it would make a great name for a rock band. Since I never joined a rock band, while we were getting shot at I thought it might also make a great name for a mercenary group."

Charlene stared at Doug until he became uncomfortable.

"A salamander is like lizard but wetter," he said sheepishly.

Charlene shook her head as she put away the pistol. "I know what a salamander is. I was supposed to be smarter than to ever get involved in something like this."

Bryce fixed his suit. "Cheer up. This will turn out great; I promise. Let's get some dinner, and then we can head to a building I've acquired that we can use as headquarters."

Lulu smiled. "Hellbender headquarters! Awesome!"

Dinner ended up being Chinese takeout, and Hellbender headquarters was a ramshackle building on the edge of town that looked to be one step away from being marked for demolition. At least this time Bryce used a key to get in the door. Inside, it appeared to be a long-abandoned office building with a thick coat of dust and cobwebs on all the furniture. Lulu was ecstatic and immediately began suggesting ideas for renovations. Charlene quickly cleaned off one table and looked through the data Bryce had gotten from the exploded robot that hired them. Once Doug had his fill of rice and noodles, he lost interest in the discussion of different tactical methods to infiltrate the Asmod research building, as it mainly went over his head. He figured they'd tell him what to do when they settled on something, so he left the three to plan while he went to get some sleep. He plopped down on an old sofa, coughed for a couple seconds from the dust that was upturned, and then closed his eyes.

Next thing Doug knew, he was hanging upside down and looking at a familiar face.

"Hello once again, Doug."

NEXT

Baens Universe Logo
Help Save Science Fiction at Jim Baen's Universe!
(NOTE: Frank J.'s hastily hacked together stories are in no way supported or condoned by Baen)

Rating: 0.8/5 (3 votes cast)

Hellbender
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9 Responses To "A Story, Bit by Bit
Hellbender: Part 11 - The Personal and the Professional"

Keep it coming O' FrankJ
Oh, first.

#1 - Posted by: Vince on July 5, 2006 03:02 PM

second that.

#2 - Posted by: LucidObscurity on July 5, 2006 04:48 PM

"Well... uh... in my defense... um... I thought it was clear from the context that I only said that to get you to sleep with me."

I really like that line. It's funny because it's true.

#3 - Posted by: Matt on July 5, 2006 06:06 PM

Is Chuck Norris going to make a guest appearance anytime soon? Just imagine all the horrible Chuck Norris jokes that would spawn.

#4 - Posted by: MikefromtheWVpartofNY on July 5, 2006 07:17 PM

A mercinary group named after a salamander.....That's what was missing.

Frank, You Rock.

#5 - Posted by: Hwy93 on July 5, 2006 09:23 PM

Hmm. So now I know what a salamander is. Good times.

#6 - Posted by: MB on July 6, 2006 02:30 AM

demolishment?

#7 - Posted by: Steve on July 7, 2006 09:03 AM

FRANK! Where is the next episode!? I'm going through withdrawl!

#8 - Posted by: Doit on July 7, 2006 05:06 PM

I think I'm in love with Lulu. still waiting for part 12 though.

#9 - Posted by: Alaska nick on July 7, 2006 07:48 PM
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