 |
|
|
|
About IMAO Giving money to Frank J. makes you happy!  Buy funniest book ever!  IMAO Podcasts IMAO Merchandise and Newsletter
 Cool shirts, mugs, stickers, and what-not!
About IMAO
If you want to send something by snail mail, e-mail with subject "P.O. Box" to get mail information for Frank J. and SarahK. About Frank J. Bloggers: Frank J. Harvey RightWingDuck Cadet Happy spacemonkey Laurence Simon SarahK Popular Categories
Fred Thompson FactsJohn Edwards Fabulous Facts lolterizt IMAO Condensed Know Thy Enemy Editorials Frank the Artist In My World Other Content
Ode to ViolenceBrief Histories IMAO Audio Bits  Read the Essay Own the Shirt Peace Gallery Search IMAO
Testimonials
"All quotes attributed to me on IMAO are made up... including this one."
-Glenn Reynolds "Unfunny treasonous ronin!" -Lou Tulio* "You, sir, are a natural born killer." -E. Harrington "You'll never get my job! Never!!!" -Jonah Goldberg "In the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth. And He did despair, for in His omniscience, He did know that His creations had but three-fifths of the splendor of that which would be IMAO." -No One of Consequence "A blogger with a sense of humor." -Some Woman on MSNBC Blogroll
Ace of Spades HQThe Anti-Idiotarian Rottweiler Blackfive Captain's Quarters Classical Values Conservative Grapevine The Corner The Daily Gut (with Jim Treacher!) Dave in Texas Eject! Eject! Eject! Electric Venom Hot Air Puppy Blender La Shawn Barber's Corner Michelle Malkin Pereiraville Protein Wisdom Rachel Lucas Right Wing News Scrappleface Serenity's Journal Townhall Blog IMAO Blogroll Bad Example Cadet Happy The Flying Space Monkey Chronicles mountaineer musings Right Wing Duck  This Blog Is Full of Crap Fred Thompson Links Fred File Blogs for Fred Fred Thompson Facts Awards
|
July 25, 2006
IMAO EXCLUSIVE: The Plan to Secure Baghdad
President Bush is outlining a plan to secure terror-torn Baghdad. In an IMAO Exclusive, we have obtained the details to this plan. PRESIDENT BUSH'S TOP TEN IDEAS TO SECURE BAGHDAD 10. Designate any area within 100 yards of a school a "Bomb Free Zone". 9. Hide all the government buildings under really large version of those hide-a-key rocks. 8. Shoot the bad people. 7. If necessary, shoot them twice. 6. Don't feed Rudy Giuliani for a week while constantly teasing him and then unleash him on the city. 5. Scotchguard everything. 4. Threaten to hand the whole place over to the Jews if everyone doesn't calm down. 3. Put special sensors all over the city to detect the presence of monkeys. 2. Lend them Superman for ten minutes a day. And the number one idea President Bush has to secure Baghdad... Ban Muslims. 14 Responses To "IMAO EXCLUSIVE: The Plan to Secure Baghdad"
Ban Muslims! Sweet! Let's make that a worldwide policy. Ban them to the U.N. building, where they can die groaning in agony! #1 - Posted by: learntodrawaline on July 25, 2006 01:31 PMLet Helen Thomas roam the streets and tell her she can have sex with any muslim she sees. After the first casualty, Baghdad will be the only place on earth the muslims will never claim again. Oh the horror, the carnage, the humanity. #2 - Posted by: The Prophet Moe Howard on July 25, 2006 01:31 PM//5. Scotchguard everything.// Only if it's Mel Gibson...(yummy) //2. Lend them Superman for ten minutes a day.// Only if it's Dean Cain...(purrrr) WOW, Frank! An exclusive list with two of my favorite fantasies. This is the HUNKIEST exclusive ever! #3 - Posted by: shimauma on July 25, 2006 01:51 PMWe tried lending them the Christopher Reeve Superman, but his cape kept getting caught in his wheels. Yes, I know I'm going to hell for that one. I've already got a nice spot picked out by the lake of fire. #4 - Posted by: Rick on July 25, 2006 03:12 PMDude, that one was harsh... I loved it. #5 - Posted by: AlanABQ on July 25, 2006 04:02 PMOT, the Whittler has posted. That is all. #6 - Posted by: sam on July 25, 2006 04:22 PMsex with helen thomas...c'mon...even the joooos aren't that tough on their enemies!!! #7 - Posted by: ussjimmycarter on July 25, 2006 05:42 PMThe jews can't have pig, so Helen Thomas is out. #8 - Posted by: Son of Bob on July 25, 2006 05:46 PMHow juvenile Frank. #9 - Posted by: Victor Mature on July 25, 2006 05:53 PMHow about instead of lending them Superman for ten minutes a day, we just lend them Chuck Norris for ten minutes for just one day. That's all it would take, period. #10 - Posted by: LokiDoki on July 25, 2006 06:59 PMI like the threat of a Jew-Run Iraq. That'd settle them Mosodomites right good. #11 - Posted by: DesertElephant on July 25, 2006 07:32 PMThe only real way to secure Bagdad is to turn the whole area into a glass parking lot. Maybe years from now the someone could build the Mall of the MIddle East there. Maybe by that time the average Muslim man will be more confident in his masculinity and not afraid of the more intelligent and logical feminine mind. Or maybe they'll all be dead, either way it's a win-win. #12 - Posted by: seanmahair on July 26, 2006 12:34 AM//Maybe by that time the average Muslim man will be more confident in his masculinity // Genetically impossible; they all have little teeny tiny man parts...don't you watch South Park? #13 - Posted by: shimauma on July 26, 2006 08:42 AMShim, But I thought size didn't matter! *Sobs* #14 - Posted by: DesertElephant on July 26, 2006 03:01 PMPost a comment
|
Buy IMAO T-Shirts 
 
 
IMAO T-Shirts
The IMAO T-Shirt Babe (winning picture) YOU BUY NEW SHIRTS NOW!!! Yay! Books!
Capitalism
Archives
By Category
24American Idol Aqua-Adventures Barackalypse Now Best of IMAO 2002 Best of IMAO 2006 Bite-Sized Wisdom Editorials Election 2008 Filthy Lies Frank Answers Frank Discussions Frank on Guns Frank Reads the Bible Frank the Artist Fred Thompson Facts Friday Cat-Blogging Fun Trivia Hellbender Hellbender Take Two Hillary Clinton Terrible Truths Humor I Hate Frank If I Were President ignis fatuous IMAO Condensed IMAO Exclusives IMAO for the Non-Deaf IMAO Reviews IMAO Think Tank In My World In My World - Fan Fiction John Edwards Fabulous Facts Know Thy Enemy lolterizt Michael Moore Mitt Romney Ads News Round-Up Newsish Fakery No, McCain't Our Military Permalink Contest Precision Guided Humor Assignments Ron Paul, Ron Paul, Ron Paul Ronin Profiles Ronin Thought of the Day SarahK's TV stuff Scary Evil Monkey Simpsons Trivia Songs & Poems State of the Frank Report Superego Totally True Tidbits WEsistance Is Facile Why Me Laugh? Yvonne's Ashes By Month
December 2008September 2008 August 2008 July 2008 June 2008 May 2008 April 2008 March 2008 February 2008 January 2008 December 2007 November 2007 October 2007 September 2007 August 2007 July 2007 June 2007 May 2007 April 2007 March 2007 February 2007 January 2007 December 2006 November 2006 October 2006 September 2006 August 2006 July 2006 June 2006 May 2006 April 2006 March 2006 February 2006 January 2006 December 2005 November 2005 October 2005 September 2005 August 2005 July 2005 June 2005 May 2005 April 2005 March 2005 February 2005 January 2005 December 2004 November 2004 October 2004 September 2004 August 2004 July 2004 June 2004 May 2004 April 2004 March 2004 February 2004 January 2004 December 2003 November 2003 October 2003 September 2003 August 2003 July 2003 June 2003 May 2003 April 2003 March 2003 February 2003 January 2003 December 2002 November 2002 October 2002 September 2002 August 2002 July 2002 March 1933
|
Stumble It!
