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August 17, 2006
Planets
The International Astronomical Union is currently working on a final definition of what a planet is so that the debate over whether Pluto is a planet or not will finally end and astronomers can finally tilt their telescopes back at the open bathroom window of their hot next door neighbor. Thanks to some skillful detective work involving one of our contributors disguising himself as a janitor, IMAO has received a patrial list of the IAU's list of planets and non-planets... (EDITORS: MARK AS EXLUSIVE TO IMAO) Earth: Planet Apparently, there's still some doubt about Uranus, possibly due to the less mature members of the IAU sniggering and giggling whenever its name is mentioned. 23 Responses To "Planets"
Fear of a Black Planet, I had that album. It played a key role during my "suburban white kid acting like an urban black teenager" phase. Fight the power! #1 - Posted by: Chris on August 17, 2006 10:32 AMWhat about Mickey Mouse's dog Pluto? Or Popeye's enemy (and John Belushi's 'Animal House' character), Bluto? Or L.(for LOONEY) Ron Hubbard's "Battlefield Earth"? #2 - Posted by: BigOrangeAxe on August 17, 2006 10:56 AMOkay, so you're unsure about your anus, how about Michael Moore's anus? Is that a planet? #3 - Posted by: Veeshir on August 17, 2006 11:08 AMI saw a license plate frame just yesterday that said: "You touch my Saturn I'll kick Uranus." Sophomoric, but I had never seen that one, before. Editor Neptune is not a planet. It is a high school attended by Veronica Mars. #5 - Posted by: Tim on August 17, 2006 11:30 AMAccording to Futurama, in the 26th century, astronomers changed the name of Uranus in order to end that stupid joke once and for all. The new name for Uranus was Urectum #6 - Posted by: Rick on August 17, 2006 11:58 AMJuvenile joke - Ikea fashion: Uranus, black hole. (some assembly required) #7 - Posted by: FormerHostage on August 17, 2006 12:15 PMWow. That's quite an interesting link. According to the proposal, Charon (moon of Pluto), Ceres (asteroid) and that new planet with the alphanumeric name all get upgraded to planet status. It probably comes with parking priveleges and exclusive rights with the Sci-Fi Channel. I'm wondering... if Ceres gets to be a planet, does that means it has something like a million moons now? #8 - Posted by: El Santo on August 17, 2006 12:17 PMCaptain Planet: Not a Planet. Also... a thinly diguised Ted Turner. CAPTAIN PLLLANNNET! #9 - Posted by: El Santo on August 17, 2006 12:21 PMMick Mars, hack guitar player for Motley Crue, not a planet. An extraterrestrial, yes, but not a planet. #10 - Posted by: PaleoMedic on August 17, 2006 12:50 PMFreddie Mercury: Not a planet. #11 - Posted by: El Santo on August 17, 2006 01:01 PMTypical scientific community, still in denial about the planet sized space station on the other side of the sun manned by the New Kryptonians under the rule of our Benevolent Overlord Kal El. They've never been willing to take him seriously ever since his short stint as a journalist at the ...ehhem, DAILY PLANET.
Veeshir - lol. Pluto is not a planet. Pluto is an animated dog that, oddly enough, does not talk. #14 - Posted by: Elisson on August 17, 2006 03:08 PMA fruit that is a cross between a Plum and an Apricot is a Pluot, not a planet. #15 - Posted by: keith on August 17, 2006 03:21 PMXena, Warrior Princess: Might actually be a planet. If you don't believe me, check out the wiki for "UB313" and find out what the astronomers who discovered it originally named that planet. #16 - Posted by: El Santo on August 17, 2006 03:54 PMLair, "Hello my name is Jimmy Pop Heh, every time the topic of planets comes up I think of that song. It's ruined the solar system forever. #19 - Posted by: SilverBubble on August 18, 2006 12:38 AMMichael Moore's anus--NOT a planet. It is, however, a black hole. #20 - Posted by: dRoast on August 18, 2006 12:29 PMThank you dRoast. Michael Moore's ass is a planet for sure. I hope Nasa never brings us pictures though. Yeah, I could do without seeing all those craters and bumpy things... #22 - Posted by: Reginleif on August 19, 2006 09:50 AMI really don't want to see the klingons circling hisanus. #23 - Posted by: Veeshir on August 19, 2006 02:46 PMPost a comment
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