Hi folks,

As you know, I live in LA. Some people think it's dangerous, mostly because they're afraid the police might attack them. That's not true. Turns out that they're just as likely to attack each other!!!

Funny. As they looked at the numbers they realized there were just as many officers shot by other officers as there were who were shot by criminals.

LA is hoping they can tone down the cop on cop shooting. Maybe we can convince them to start by writing each other tickets, or letting each other off with a warning.

It’s gotten so bad that the police have a new term – Driving While Police Officer.

They also have a new locker room slogan: Just for today, I will not shoot anybody.

Country singer Troy Lee Gentry is in trouble with the law for killing a tame bear and then claiming he killed it in the wild.

They suspect he filmed the thing on video and edited to look like he was on a real hunt. Here are some tips for editing. When you show the bear, and some damaged trees and dead animals - that swath of destruction makes for good video.

Bad video is when you film the bear, and right next to him you can still see the bear’s little tricycle.

Troy Gentry is part of Montgomery Gentry, a singing duo with country hits such as If You Ever Stop Loving Me, My Town, , and I’m Coming to Your House to Shoot Your Hamster.

A judge in Ohio has ruled that two teens can finish out their football seasons before having to serve their jail time. The teens will be doing time for setting up a deer decoy in the middle of the road. The prank led to people being severely injured.

Judge said "I shouldn't be doing this, but I'm going to. I see positive things about participating in football,"

Football doing positive things? I don’t know. It didn’t seem to HELP THEM BEFORE!!!

But maybe a couple of extra games is what they need to really get back on the right track.

This judge is only gonna confuse other people in his court.

Judge: I order you to serve two months as a wide receiver!

Defendant: (pumping fist) Yes!! I LOVE football.

Judge: Who said anything about football?

So the quarterback and his teammate are back with the Wildcats and getting ready for their next game against Sandusky Bears.

Sadly, their game against the bears this Friday was cancelled.

They too were killed by country singers.

Don’t you love being able to click on the links and reading about these stories?

Well, kids in developing nations will also feel that joy because Thai kids are now testing the new $100 laptop.

It uses a handcrank for power, and has a flash drive instead of a hard drive but otherwise, it’s just enough to get kids hooked on computing.

This should lead to some interesting fundraising commercials.

Announcer: Little Kasem needs your help. Won’t you please help him? For just $30 dollars a month you can help Kasem get DSL.

Kasem: Right now, I surf the net using two cans and some string. It’s only a little bit faster than dial up.

Or better yet.

Announcer: Little Suchin has carpal tunnel syndrome. Won’t you please donate today? Just $30 dollars buys sweet little Suchin an operation and a case of Red Bull.

Suchin: Please help me. Call the toll free number to get my full story – or visit me at MySpace.

The cool part about these laptops is the crank to generate power. That part is awesome. All for $100 dollars developed by a non-profit organization.

They would have bought Dell Laptops but, thankfully, many developing nations have already discovered fire.

Here in California, lawmakers are pondering a new law.

According to the SF Chronicle website, the bill would require pet shops to house no more than four mice per 1-square-foot-wide by 9-inch-tall container, and place an exercise wheel and gnawing item in the cage.

Good thing the state senate has some conservatives. As originally written, the law demanded Cable TV and conjugal visits.

Who COMES UP WITH THIS STUFF?

When I’m at a store with my kids and they want a hamster, I think about the price of the hamster and the food.

I don’t sit there worrying abut the hamster’s cholesterol.

Do I really need a hamster to be in shape?

Maybe.

You never know when it might have to run away from crazed country singers.

**

Remember, I can't hear you laugh. If something struck your funnybone - post it in comments.

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