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January 12, 2007
Scientists Change Doomsday Clock: Announce Doomsday Savings Time
Posted by RightWingDuck at 04:25 PM | View blog reactions | Comments (13)

doomclock.JPG

Top Scientists today announced changes to the Doomsday Clock.

"The Doomsday clock has always signaled the end of the world. With the advancement of nuclear weaponry in Iran and North Korea, we feel we're getting closer to the edge. However, we felt compelled to make adjustments to help us get through the long nuclear winter."

Scientists hope that my having Doomsday Savings Time (DST) we should be able to get a few more hours each day of gloomy darkness.

Doomsday Savings Time will apply to all 50 states with the exception of Arizona.

Rating: 2.3/5 (6 votes cast)

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13 Responses To "Scientists Change Doomsday Clock: Announce Doomsday Savings Time"

And these guys get paid for being curmudgeony?? Damn, I need a raise.

#1 - Posted by: shimauma on January 12, 2007 04:59 PM

The Democrats are calling for the addition of a "snooze" button.

#2 - Posted by: Pete on January 12, 2007 05:09 PM

"top scientists" eh? Are these the same as "top men"? Does this mean they've got the "Ark of the Covenant"? What have they been doing with it all this time...I want answers!

#3 - Posted by: TB StLouis on January 12, 2007 05:20 PM

What's with these scientists using an ANALOG clock???? I'd think that they'd want to go digital, with extra points for binary.

His laptop probably has vacuum tubes...

#4 - Posted by: IllTemperedCur on January 12, 2007 06:10 PM

I say we break in and move the clock back to a quarter till six.

Honestly, these folks have been stuck within ten minutes till midnight for the last 50 years. Yes, I do take the nuclear threat seriously, but according to these numbskulls we should already be dead already a few hundred times over. Sorry, the only countries that have a doomsday type arsenal are the US and Russia. Neither of us are going to be sending them any time soon. Nuclear weapons are a concern but please stop hyperventilating.

By the way it was Reagan and Gorbachev that rolled back the nuclear treat, not the self important preachy folks at the Bulletin of Atomic Scientists.

#5 - Posted by: Neo-andertal on January 12, 2007 06:13 PM

Kill for gain or shoot to maim
But we don't need a reason
The golden goose is on the loose
and never out of season.
Blackened pride still burns in side
this shell of bloody treason
Here's my gun for a barrel of fun
for the love of the living death!

The killer's breed or the deamon's seed
the glamor, the fortune, the pain.
Got to war again, blood is freedom's stain
Don't you pray fror my soul anymore.

Two minutes to midnight,
the hands that threaten doom.
Two minuites to midnight,
to kill the unborn in the womb...

Yeah! Sorry for the Iron Maiden break, but the psudo scientists needed a tune to help them bang their heads.

#6 - Posted by: Wolfman Dan on January 12, 2007 07:58 PM

Well, when Doomsday hits Arizona, it will be 5000ºF but it's a dry heat.

#7 - Posted by: Tommy the Towelhead on January 13, 2007 01:39 AM

I say put the clock at 12:30 if it prevents that lamest of spandex wearing metal bands Iron Maiden from adding their two pence.

Anyone who tries to rhyme "again" with "stain" in the modern era should be shot.

#8 - Posted by: bunkerboy on January 13, 2007 04:47 AM

Most of us "Christians" know all about Doomsday. We call it the Second Coming.

And it's going to happen no matter what their stupid clock says. So as usual the scientists and leftoids are making much to do about nothing and not paying attention to what is really important.

An exercise in futility. But it's the only exercise some of these folks get, that jumping to conclusions and shoving their feet in their mouths, ala Barbara "foot in mouth" Boxer. (see todays Drudge)

#9 - Posted by: seanmahair on January 13, 2007 09:09 AM

As I understand it, one of Canada's Maritime Provinces is 30 minutes ahead of us. I think that means they've already been destroyed.

#10 - Posted by: K T Cat on January 13, 2007 02:23 PM

Is that John McCain trying to hold back the hands of time?

#11 - Posted by: wtf on January 13, 2007 08:18 PM

i think we should do a dumbsday clock for the clowns who do the doomsday clock. We should put a picture of the head of ronald reagan on the hour hand and soupy sales on the other. That would give our clock instant credibility.

#12 - Posted by: captamerica on January 16, 2007 07:30 AM

"Scientists prepare to move Doomsday Clock"

Let me know when they move the Doomsday Clock to New Orleans. They can set it up in Ray Nagin’s office. Seems to me like an appropriate place to express unremitting doom.

#13 - Posted by: Neo-andertal on January 18, 2007 11:39 PM
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