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February 07, 2007
Are Muslim Kids Learning?
A Saudi Arabia funded school in Britain uses a textbook which describes Jews as "apes" and Christians as "pigs." As a Christian, I find this offensive. This is either implying that, because I'm a Christian, I'm a pig (I'm not) or that because I'm not a pig, I'm not really a Christian (also not true). I think Jews won't like being called apes either, and I IM'd Lair about this (Christians are allowed one Jewish friend) and his response was to toss leaves in the air and then pound his chest in an angry manner. Now, before I get too judgmental, I should note that the Christian textbooks I had in school said the Muslims were "echidnas." This is also not true. While Muslims are small mammals and can often be quite spiky, Muslims do not lay eggs. By the seventh grade, that passage had been crossed out, though. We have to be careful what we are teaching kids - even the Muslims ones - and misidentifying the species of Jews and Christians is just one of the problem of the Muslim textbook in question. Here are some other things it says that could be a problem for impressionable youths: * "Warnings against sticking your finger in a electric socket are part of the Zionist conspiracy." While it is true that part of the Zionist conspiracy is making sure their kids are not electrocuted (electrocuted kids can't grow up to seize Muslim land), Zionists honestly don't care if Muslims kids stick their fingers in sockets. * "If you drink everything under the kitchen sink, you'll gain superpowers." There are in fact very few recorded instances of this happening. This myth was mostly likely spread by companies that make liquid drain cleaners hoping to force parents to buy more of their product after their kids wastefully drank it all. * "A faithful Muslim needs not look both ways before crossing the street as Allah will guide him to safety." Only partially true. While Allah will look left and then right before guiding a faithful Muslim child across the street, Allah always forgets to look left once again after looking to the right. The preferred safe way to cross the street is to look left, then right, and then check left again, which a child will have to do himself. * "Fear not if you are lost, young child, for Allah shall send a stranger to give you a ride." Completely untrue. Allah may - may - give you cab fare if you pray really hard, but kids really should have cellphones these days. I guess we Americans should get Muslims kids in Britain better text books with like math and stuff in them, but, then again, those kids will just grow up hating us all the more for the extra homework. 8 Responses To "Are Muslim Kids Learning?"
I wonder what they consider ATHIESTS, lampreys? #1 - Posted by: spacemonkey on February 7, 2007 02:52 PMThey consider atheists "Target Practice." #2 - Posted by: Laurence Simon on February 7, 2007 02:56 PMAllah wouldn't be giving cab fare to anyone. We all know that the cabs are driven by Moozlims, and therefore would give one of their own a free ride. Kinda like the way Clinton did for them in the '90's. #3 - Posted by: AlanABQ on February 7, 2007 04:08 PMWhy complain about muslims calling us apes and pigs? That still puts us far above muslims on the evolutionary scale. #4 - Posted by: Master Shake on February 7, 2007 05:37 PMSo what would mooselibs consider themselves? Liberals? Uh oh...the mooselibs are probably going to riot for that insult (that's as low on the evolutionary scale as you can get)! #5 - Posted by: Wolfman Dan on February 7, 2007 07:50 PMThis would only be a problem is Muslims could actually read. In actuality, the "Koran" was a book by a guy named Allan, who loved the band Korn. He lamented the demise of vinyl in hi-fidelity, and recommended A few angry muslims with reading comprehension issues later it became the Koran, about a guy named Allah who had a problem with infidels, and there's Jihads and Fatwahs. A few reading lessons (or someone to help them with the big words) could have saved everyone a lot of trouble.
British Muslim textbooks calling Christians "pigs" and Jews "apes"? I smell a new Pink Floyd album... #7 - Posted by: bunkerboy on February 8, 2007 09:01 AMMooslims are nothing more than sheep with anger issues. They are ignint, cab-driving snivelling cowards who prey on the weak, especially their women. I am getting to the point that we should build an ark, put 40 pairs of "tolerant" mooslims on board, set them adrift in the Atlantic then just nuke the shit out of the rest of them. Then we can have robots harvest their oil crops and strip the decayed flesh off their bones and make wind chimes out of them. Then we can beach the ark and place the 40 pairs of "tolerant" mooslims in the middle of the Sahara with no oil and leave them with some sandspur seeds, two goats and some lottery tickets. Of course we will have to put a dome of protection over all those pesky joos, since if we don't we will have done the job for the mooslims that they so desire. Oh, and we will make Jimmuh Carter president for life of the new Saharan mooslim state. Mebbe we can call the new county Porkistan. Just imagine what I might suggest if I weren't such a good Christian. #8 - Posted by: captamerica on February 9, 2007 08:22 AMPost a comment
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