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February 12, 2007
Edwards Steals Blogsphere's Comedy Gold!
Foul-mouthed, hate-filled, lefty blogger Amanda Marcotte of Pandagon has officially resigned from her post as the Edwards '08 campaign's official screech-owl. I wonder how the Breck Girl will replace Amanda's priceless ability to mire his campaign in controversy... * 100 monkeys at 100 typewriters that only have 4 keys each - K, U, C, and F. * Hire David Duke as his campaign adviser. * Make every Wednesday at campaign HQ "cigars and interns night". * Hire Ted Kennedy to drive the interns home Thursday morning. * Talk up his new charity, "Centrifuges for Iran". * Start taking hair styling tips from Zach Braff. * Eat Snickers bars in the garage with John Kerry. * Puppy blending! - it's not just for bloggers anymore! * Take the Dixie Chicks with him on his next fact-finding tour to Iraq. * Admit to being the real father of Anna Nicole Smith's daughter, Dannielynn. * Accept an invitation to the Duke LaCrosse team's next kegger. * Tear down a homeless shelter to make room for his new 280,000 square foot house. * Refuse to hire black campaign staffers unless they're sufficiently clean and articulate. Any other suggestions? 8 Responses To "Edwards Steals Blogsphere's Comedy Gold!"
He could fill himself with hot white sticky mineral spirits and take Plan 9 from outer space in the morning. #1 - Posted by: spacemonkey on February 12, 2007 10:37 PMHe could fill his property with exotic animals and carnival rides, then invite little boys to a sleepover. #2 - Posted by: Pete on February 12, 2007 11:23 PMDidn’t Edwards run against David Duke. Oh wait, wrong man, wrong campaign, wrong century! I was just hoping we could use those “Vote for the crook, it’s important” bumper stickers again. By far the funniest campaign slogan ever. Get support from Kos, that always works. #4 - Posted by: Brian the Adequate on February 13, 2007 07:40 AMHire Howard Dean as his campaign manager or name him as his running mate. #5 - Posted by: Silicon Valley Jim on February 13, 2007 10:57 AMThe two Americas decided that Amanda is a flaming nutbag. If you're keeping score, we are now up to three Americas. #6 - Posted by: Al Czervik on February 13, 2007 02:38 PM1. Hire Michael Richards to "punch up" all his speeches with a little comedic zing. Who put something in spacemonkeys gravy? And what was it, I want some? #8 - Posted by: DohXs on February 13, 2007 07:49 PMPost a comment
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