Recently Tim O'Reilly of O'Reilly Radar posted his first draft of the "Blogger Code of Conduct", a set of voluntary guidelines designed to make the blogospheric conversation a touch more civil.

1. We take responsibility for our own words and for the comments we allow on our blog.

We are committed to the "Civility Enforced" standard: we will not post unacceptable content, and we'll delete comments that contain it.

We define unacceptable content as anything included or linked to that:
- is being used to abuse, harass, stalk, or threaten others
- is libelous, knowingly false, ad-hominem, or misrepresents another person,
- infringes upon a copyright or trademark
- violates an obligation of confidentiality
- violates the privacy of others

We define and determine what is "unacceptable content" on a case-by-case basis, and our definitions are not limited to this list. If we delete a comment or link, we will say so and explain why. [We reserve the right to change these standards at any time with no notice.]

2. We won't say anything online that we wouldn't say in person.

3. We connect privately before we respond publicly.

When we encounter conflicts and misrepresentation in the blogosphere, we make every effort to talk privately and directly to the person(s) involved--or find an intermediary who can do so--before we publish any posts or comments about the issue.

4. When we believe someone is unfairly attacking another, we take action.

When someone is publishing comments or blog postings that are offensive, we'll tell them so (privately, if possible--see above) and ask them to publicly make amends.
If those published comments could be construed as a threat, and the perpetrator doesn't withdraw them and apologize, we will cooperate with law enforcement to protect the target of the threat.

5. We do not allow anonymous comments.

We require commenters to supply a valid email address before they can post, though we allow commenters to identify themselves with an alias, rather than their real name.

6. We ignore the trolls.

We prefer not to respond to nasty comments about us or our blog, as long as they don't veer into abuse or libel. We believe that feeding the trolls only encourages them--"Never wrestle with a pig. You both get dirty, but the pig likes it." Ignoring public attacks is often the best way to contain them.

All fine & dandy, but it's certainly not for everyone. A blog must be true to its own inherent nature. That's why Frank J. wrote his own set of guidelines specifically for IMAO, and even Michelle Malkin has her own shorter, sweeter version.

And that got me to thinking that, since liberals are notoriously lazy about writing things for themselves, I should put one together for Daily Kos.

We celebrate the blogosphere because it embraces our moral and political delusions. But delusions can only survive in the absence of rational challenge. We present this Kos Kode of Konduct in hopes that it helps create an insular and ideologically pure - if somewhat conceptually incestuous - culture that encourages both personal psychosis and deranged demagogery.

1. We are merely victims of others' misinterpretations of our words and the comments that forced themselves on our blog.

We are committed to the "Liberalism Enforced" standard: we are - by definition, since we're liberals - incapable of posting unacceptable content, but we'll sure as hell delete comments that contain it.

We define unacceptable content as anything included or linked to that:
- fails to abuse, harass, stalk, or threaten Republicans
- is libelous, knowingly false, ad-hominem, or misrepresents Democrats, unless we've decided to throw said Democrat to the wolves, like that SOB Lieberman
- infringes upon a copyright or trademark, except in cases of plagiarism, AKA "fair use"
- violates an obligation of confidentiality - exceptionally juicy and/or speculative pieces of gossip notwithstanding
- violates the privacy of others while doing nothing to bring search engine traffic to our site
- paints aught but the most unflattering portrait of not-my-President Bush

We define and determine what is "unacceptable content" via consultation with a Magic 8 Ball, and our definitions are not limited consistency, logic, fairness or decency. If we delete a comment or link, we will pretend it was never there and pray that no one thinks to check the Google Cache or the Internet Archive. [We reserve the right to change these standards at any time with no notice and then vehemently maintain that we didn't.]

2. We won't say anything online that we wouldn't say in person if we were surrounded by a gang of liberal friends and standing behind armed body guards - who, by the way, are the only people that should be allowed to own guns, and you wouldn't BELIEVE how much it pains us to even let THAT one slide.

3. We abuse publicly before we respond privately - not that we have anything to apologize for in any case.

When we encounter non-conforming notions in the blogosphere, we make every effort to smear loudly and unreservedly the person(s) involved - or find an frothing mob who can do so - as we publish our obscenity and invective-laden posts or comments about the issue.

4. When we believe someone is unfairly attacking a liberal, we'll muck-rake and hatchet-job that little weasel into oblivion.

When someone is publishing comments or blog postings that are offensive or even slightly challenging to our truthyish world-view, we'll screech like a Muslim in a sausage factory (and with as little regard for decorum as Britney Spears wearing a short skirt while getting out of a limo - see above) and demand public acts of contrition and/or self-flagellation. If those published comments could be construed as a threat, or if we find them even moderately irksome, and the perpetrator doesn't withdraw them and apologize and bring us a shrubbery... one that looks nice... and not too expensive... we will cooperate with law enforcement to protect the target of the threat. Or maybe we'll just post pictures of the perp's kids' on a pedophile message board. Have to consult the Magic 8 Ball on that one.

5. We do not allow anonymous comments unless we agree with them. Otherwise DELETE! DELETE! DELETE! But you can't prove that happened.

We require commenters to supply a valid email address before they can post so that we can sell our mailing list to the boys at Cialis-R-Us. However, we do allow commenters to identify themselves with an alias, rather than their real name, as long as it's something clever like Hillary08 or BushIsHitler.

6. We don't ignore the trolls. We ARE the trolls.

We prefer not to respond to nasty comments about us or our blog, as long as they don't veer into abuse or libel. But then again, nothing draws page views like a good pissing contest, so GAME ON, RETHUGLICANS! We believe that feeding the trolls keeps them fat & happy - "Always wrestle with a pig. You both get dirty, and we LOVE it! (although we apologize to any Muslims who might be offended by that image)." Posting and linking to public attacks is often the best way to encourage them. Besides, it brings search engine traffic to our site.

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