About IMAO



Giving money to Frank J. makes you happy!


Buy funniest book ever!





IMAO Podcasts
IMAO Merchandise and Newsletter

Cool shirts, mugs, stickers, and what-not!

About IMAO
Then conquer we must, for our cause is just, 
And this be our motto--'In God is our trust.' 
And the star-spangled banner in triumph doth wave 
O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave.


If you want to send something by snail mail, e-mail with subject "P.O. Box" to get mail information for Frank J. and SarahK.

About Frank J.

Bloggers:
Frank J.
Harvey
RightWingDuck
Cadet Happy
spacemonkey
Laurence Simon
SarahK

Popular Categories
Fred Thompson Facts
John Edwards Fabulous Facts
lolterizt
IMAO Condensed
Know Thy Enemy
Editorials
Frank the Artist
In My World
Other Content
Ode to Violence
Brief Histories
IMAO Audio Bits


Read the Essay
Own the Shirt
Peace Gallery
Search IMAO
Google
Web www.imao.us
Testimonials
"All quotes attributed to me on IMAO are made up... including this one."
-Glenn Reynolds

"Unfunny treasonous ronin!"
-Lou Tulio*

"You, sir, are a natural born killer."
-E. Harrington

"You'll never get my job! Never!!!"
-Jonah Goldberg

"In the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth. And He did despair, for in His omniscience, He did know that His creations had but three-fifths of the splendor of that which would be IMAO."
-No One of Consequence

"A blogger with a sense of humor."
-Some Woman on MSNBC
Blogroll
Ace of Spades HQ
The Anti-Idiotarian Rottweiler
Blackfive
Captain's Quarters
Classical Values
Conservative Grapevine
The Corner
The Daily Gut (with Jim Treacher!)
Dave in Texas
Eject! Eject! Eject!
Electric Venom
Hot Air
Puppy Blender
La Shawn Barber's Corner
Michelle Malkin
Pereiraville
Protein Wisdom
Rachel Lucas
Right Wing News
Scrappleface
Serenity's Journal
Townhall Blog

IMAO Blogroll
Bad Example
Cadet Happy
The Flying Space Monkey Chronicles
mountaineer musings
Right Wing Duck
SarahK & Cadet Happy snark TV
This Blog Is Full of Crap

Fred Thompson Links
Fred File
Blogs for Fred
Fred Thompson Facts
Awards



 

June 20, 2007
Fun Facts About The Ron Paul Supporter(s)
Posted by spacemonkey at 05:12 PM | View blog reactions | Comments (29)

Ron Paul supporters are easy to recognize, their signature headgear, when properly applied also keeps fat from dripping on your grill and flaring up. Also his name is Barry.

Ron Paul supporters not only appear when his name is invoked 3 times, it drives them crazy, an admittedly short trip.

The Federal Reserve killed most of Ron Paul's supporters puppies.

If you're bitten by a Ron Paul supporter if you don't become one, you do become a carrier.

Where do Ron Paul supporters have their meetups? A house of mirrors.

Ron Paul supporters never get sick and can only be killed by decapitating them. There can be/is only one.

When Ron Paul returns to the Earth, his followers believe he will restore the constitution so well that the ink will smell wet and also miraculously restore the moat around America to its pre-civil war glory.

To a Ron Paul supporter the first 10 amendments to the U.S. Constitution are collectively known as the Bill of WRONGS!

Every time a bell rings a Ron Paul supporter get his mouth very salivated.

Ron Paul supporters think everyone who doesn't support him fears him like they fear getting abducted by aliens, again.

When the feces found in the U.S. Capital was determined to be Ron Paul's, his supporters were quick to hail it the best idea, anywhere, ever and also delicious.

If Ron Paul falls in a forest, his supporter(s) will claim it's because gravity is inherently unconstitutional.

Some claim Ron Paul supporters spam online polls, the truth is they just all have the same I.P. address because... Hey! LOOK kittens!

The most ardent of Ron Paul's followers think the US government is too big when it has more people than the secret number Ron Paul has written on his magic anti-alien hemp underpants.

29 Responses To "Fun Facts About The Ron Paul Supporter(s)"

L.Ron Paul Hubbard on quite a few occasions has been seen sipping Tang on the veranda of his spacious summer home on Alpha Centauri

#1 - Posted by: on June 20, 2007 05:30 PM

Ron Paul is one of the few "honkies" who is allowed to join Minister Louis Farrakhan and Prophet (Profit?) Elija Muhammad on the Nation of Islam Mother Wheel to do tha "gangsta lean" with 40s of OE.

He a down hustla soo-preem!

#2 - Posted by: Unda-Kuvva Bruddah on June 20, 2007 05:34 PM

Ron Paul supporters not only appear when his name is invoked 3 times, it drives them crazy, an admittedly short trip.

I knew there had to be a C'thulhu connection somewhere!

#3 - Posted by: Master Shake on June 20, 2007 05:40 PM

Lets be nice here (at least as nice as we are to anyone on IMAO). Sure, I am going to vote for Thompson as I dont think Ron Paul has a real chance, and...because Thompson is awesome...but if you really consider his policies. No ACLU, no IRS...pretty much no annoying non essential government agencies, and the fact that he wants to restore the liberties things like "The Patriot Act" have taken away, I dont think you can disagree with his politics as much as you can say that he is a crazy idealist who would never be able to actually do half the stuff he wants because of our ridiculously evil corrupt congress. I suppose y'all think that Fred Thompson and Chuck Norris are actually going to physically beat the congress into submission?

#4 - Posted by: Brad on June 20, 2007 05:59 PM

The reason I hate Ron Paul is that every individual letter is far away from the one before it. Whereas with something like Fred, well, it doesn't get any better than that! (Oh, plus Ron Paul is a loon. That's another reason I hate him.)

#5 - Posted by: Joel on June 20, 2007 06:17 PM

Actually, I think that theory holds wait. Hilary makes me jump from an L to an A - ugh! - while Barak is all over the place as well. It doesn't explain John Edwards, but that is irrelevant, as he is such a nobody I won't be typing his name enough to get finger cramps.

#6 - Posted by: Joel on June 20, 2007 06:21 PM

Ron Paul supporters...appear when his name is invoked 3 times

Ron Paul was the inspiration for Beetlejuice??

(Of course Beetlejuice had better dental hygene)

#7 - Posted by: Blind Ape Of Truth on June 20, 2007 06:22 PM

Dat Ron Paul is a reg'lar statue of limitations!

#8 - Posted by: Archie Bunker on June 20, 2007 06:55 PM

I'm a professional in the mid-atlantic who owns his own small business. I have a young family I love and provide for every day. I support Ron Paul. This movement will prove you wrong. We are much more than a few I.P.s

#9 - Posted by: dbassam on June 20, 2007 08:15 PM

I have thirteen Ph.Ds and have won ten Nobel Prizes. With science, I have already determined that Ron Paul will be our next president. Ron Paul will get over nineteen billion votes in the election. For his first act as president, Ron Paul will squeeze oil from rocks…with his mind. All of this is true, and I'm not a sockpuppet.

#10 - Posted by: Socky Sockpuppet on June 20, 2007 08:23 PM

Nicely done, spacemonkey. But don't forget, Ron is only an a-l-d from being our greatest president.

#11 - Posted by: DohXs on June 20, 2007 08:24 PM

That was a pretty long way to go just work in that feces link.

#12 - Posted by: CochinoMarrano on June 20, 2007 08:32 PM

I am also a professional in the mid-Atlantic who owns his own small business. I also have a young family who I love and provide for every day. My wife and I have good sex often. Really good...and really often. So, who I vote for is important. Very important. And, you should pay attention to who I endorse. And, I also support Ron Paul. Why? Because, when I play Britney Spears' "Baby One More Time" backwards, she tells me to. I hear you Britney. I hear you.

#13 - Posted by: Son of Bob on June 20, 2007 10:05 PM

It's time to show your support for Ron Paul. In an effort to raise awareness for Ron Paul, I'm asking you to read and Digg this article. With your support, we can bump this story to the front page, and raise awareness for Dr. Ron Paul. It would also be very beneficial to spread the word through your blog. Thanks for your support!

#14 - Posted by: Sean on June 20, 2007 11:09 PM

Sean, you do realize that we have been spreading the word about Ron Paul on this blog for the last few days, don't you? Of course, by "spreading the word" I mean "relentlessly ridiculing him and his cultists."

(This is either some sweet, sweet irony or someone forgot their "/sarc" tag....)

#15 - Posted by: Master Shake on June 20, 2007 11:50 PM

Aw, comeon guys. Even the democratics have some loons running. It's only fair that Ronny and the brown trousers match them.

#16 - Posted by: Skul on June 21, 2007 01:04 AM

One Ron Paul supporter has schizophrenia. This has effectively doubled the number of Ron Paul supporters.

#17 - Posted by: drobviousso on June 21, 2007 02:05 AM

Ron Paul, Ron Paul, ....

RON PAUL!

Oh wait, dbassam already showed up once today. I'm sorry, Barry - I didn't mean to disturb you again. Never mind.

#18 - Posted by: SumGuy on June 21, 2007 06:24 AM

"If Ron Paul falls in a forest, his supporter(s) will claim it's because gravity is inherently unconstitutional."

LOL! :-D

For the record, the only thing I hate about Ron Paul (and the Libertarian Party - to which he still belongs in spirit) is his childlike sense of foreign policy. Sadly, post-9/11, it's not a shortcoming I can overlook.

So I hold my nose and vote for Republicans who spend like Democrats so that I can live long enough to hate how the Republican Party constantly betrays what little lip-service it gives to "smaller government".

#19 - Posted by: Harvey on June 21, 2007 07:53 AM

Wouldn't

Ai! Ai! Cthulhu F’taghn!!

be a lot easier for the invocation?

#20 - Posted by: N. O'Brain on June 21, 2007 08:28 AM

"dbassam"

Hmmm, let's try something:
Let's add the letters "u", "m", "l", and "e" to that shall we?

dumbasslame

...or...in other words...

Dumb-Ass Lame

Coincidence or conspiracy? Only Ron Paul knows fersure!

#21 - Posted by: FormerHostage on June 21, 2007 10:07 AM

I really liked Sean's link to "Who is Ron Paul?", check out the first two comments.

"Nobody"

and, my personal favorite

It's not so much a question of who as it is a question of what is Ron Paul.

#22 - Posted by: Veeshir on June 21, 2007 10:42 AM

I have one-hundred-and-ninety-six PhDs from the Ivy League and the Berlinisches Staat Politechnikum, am in the mid-Atlantic doing the sidestroke, and can fly using the power of my own flatulence.

Based in my personal magnificence and self-proclaimed Curriculum Vitae, I can, unquestioningly, state that Ron Paul WILL be our next president.

Oh, did I mention that I am typing this using my nose because I'm currently fitted with a jacket that has really long sleeves that buckle up in back whilst reclining in my fully padded (floor, ceiling, walls) suite?

I didn't?

Oh well...RON PAUL RON PAUL RON PAUL!!!

#23 - Posted by: William O'Blivion on June 21, 2007 10:58 AM

I've been converted! All these posters have opened my eyes! I even bought the official Support Ron Paul T-Shirt with the REALLY long sleeves. My Assistant(nurse)is typing this for me. Ooo! Time for injections and Jello!

#24 - Posted by: DesertElephant on June 21, 2007 11:44 AM

Yes, Desert Elephant is correct, us fantastic Ron Pauliasts (like pederasts, but more splendid), do ever so enjoy our Chlorprolamine and Thorazine injections along with our spork-fed dollops of grape jello...

That in no way implies a questionable sanity level or denigrates our fashion-forward senisbilities...because us elite Ron Pauliacs (like hemophilliacs but with less blood flow to the brain) all KNOW that you not Paulian folks envy our extra-long sleeved style and ability to lip-flip and drool while under heavy restraints.

Someone has to lead the way and Ron Paul is just that leaden way!

#25 - Posted by: Wm. O'Blivion, PhD x26; LLD; MD; D.Div. on June 21, 2007 01:45 PM

I am an average-looking guy at a midwestern college. One afternoon, two gorgeous co-eds came up to my dorm room wearing only flimsy negligees and carrying bottles of wine.

Oh, wait, I thought this was "Letters to Penthouse Forum."

Sorry.

#26 - Posted by: Martin on June 21, 2007 04:06 PM

I thought the writer of the article was looney. Then I read the comments from all the moonbats and realized that the author's readers are even further removed from reality.

Thankfully there are a high percentage of sane people in the USA and most will vote for Ron Paul.

#27 - Posted by: Carl Deen on June 21, 2007 04:08 PM

Hey, Carl Deen's nurse loosened his restraints, no fair!

Just for that, I'm gonna spill my koolaid all over his macaroni art and hide his elmer's glue.

That'll show him!!

#28 - Posted by: Wm O'Blivion on June 21, 2007 05:10 PM

I would just like to offer Carl Dean a "high price" for his house. Since he thinks >0.1% is a "high" percentage, I figure he'll think $10 is a "high" price.

#29 - Posted by: beez on June 22, 2007 06:56 AM
Post a comment




Remember me?

(You may use HTML tags for style)

 

Buy IMAO T-Shirts


IMAO T-Shirts

The IMAO T-Shirt Babe
(winning picture) YOU BUY NEW SHIRTS NOW!!!
Yay! Books!





Capitalism
Archives
By Category
24
American Idol
Aqua-Adventures
Barackalypse Now
Best of IMAO 2002
Best of IMAO 2006
Bite-Sized Wisdom
Editorials
Election 2008
Filthy Lies
Frank Answers
Frank Discussions
Frank on Guns
Frank Reads the Bible
Frank the Artist
Fred Thompson Facts
Friday Cat-Blogging
Fun Trivia
Hellbender
Hellbender Take Two
Hillary Clinton Terrible Truths
Humor
I Hate Frank
If I Were President
ignis fatuous
IMAO Condensed
IMAO Exclusives
IMAO for the Non-Deaf
IMAO Reviews
IMAO Think Tank
In My World
In My World - Fan Fiction
John Edwards Fabulous Facts
Know Thy Enemy
lolterizt
Michael Moore
Mitt Romney Ads
News Round-Up
Newsish Fakery
No, McCain't
Our Military
Permalink Contest
Precision Guided Humor Assignments
Ron Paul, Ron Paul, Ron Paul
Ronin Profiles
Ronin Thought of the Day
SarahK's TV stuff
Scary Evil Monkey
Simpsons Trivia
Songs & Poems
State of the Frank Report
Superego
Totally True Tidbits
WEsistance Is Facile
Why Me Laugh?
Yvonne's Ashes
By Month
December 2008
September 2008
August 2008
July 2008
June 2008
May 2008
April 2008
March 2008
February 2008
January 2008
December 2007
November 2007
October 2007
September 2007
August 2007
July 2007
June 2007
May 2007
April 2007
March 2007
February 2007
January 2007
December 2006
November 2006
October 2006
September 2006
August 2006
July 2006
June 2006
May 2006
April 2006
March 2006
February 2006
January 2006
December 2005
November 2005
October 2005
September 2005
August 2005
July 2005
June 2005
May 2005
April 2005
March 2005
February 2005
January 2005
December 2004
November 2004
October 2004
September 2004
August 2004
July 2004
June 2004
May 2004
April 2004
March 2004
February 2004
January 2004
December 2003
November 2003
October 2003
September 2003
August 2003
July 2003
June 2003
May 2003
April 2003
March 2003
February 2003
January 2003
December 2002
November 2002
October 2002
September 2002
August 2002
July 2002
March 1933