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July 11, 2007
How Can It Get Any Worse?
Posted by Frank J. at 12:03 PM | View blog reactions | Comments (38)

Allahpundit seems to be getting quite dejected with politics. In this post, he talked about sitting out the elections. When someone mentioned that that could mean Hillary Clinton will be elected, AP replied, "Just don’t care anymore. How can it be any worse?"

I like Allahpundit's blogging, so, to cheer him up, I'm going to tell him exactly how things can get worse. In fact, things can get so bad he'll look back upon this day as the Golden Age and wish he worked harder to get spineless Republicans elected.

HOW THINGS CAN GET WORSE

* We get socialized health care and waits for appointments become so bad that you'll be glad to see any doctor, even if he is an avowed terrorist.

* There really is a vast conspiracy of the Mexicans and Canadians to make a North American Union. First step, get rid of all the pesky Americans.

* World is plunged into ice age, but we're still not allowed to do anything that leaves a carbon footprint because, in Al Gore's words, "Global warming is going to come really, really soon. I'm super cereal!"

* Michael Moore grows in mass to the point he has an event horizon the size of Montana. Reviews of his new film constantly use the word "inescapable."

* In a huge act of multiculturalism, Michigan enacts sharia law. American cars are then built with new features to assist in implementing fuel-air bombs.

* We retreat from Iraq in such a cowardly manner that any military threat in the future is met with derisive laughter causing us to make even more impotent threats.

* Katie Couric is replaced by Rosie O'Donnell.

* Passage of the Fairness Doctrine means every funny IMAO post must be followed by a horribly unfunny one (it would be different; trust me).

* To help with the floundering housing market, the government encourages random arson.

* The Supreme Court rules that suicide bombing is a protected form of expression.

* Finally bowing to the inevitable, Michelle Malkin replaces the staff of Hot Air with underpaid Mexicans. Because of the cost savings, they all get iPhones.

* Things get so bad and so many people leave the country that Ron Paul actually is the last hope for America.

How do you think things could worse.

Rating: 2.2/5 (7 votes cast)

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