Frank, I've bought T-Shirts from ThoseShirts.com and wedding presents for the J's. When I suggested the SarahK TV stuff be kept on her own blog, I was essentially told to sit and twist. You're like the republican party when they ask me for money. You like me now, but will you respect me after November? Doesn't seem so.

[You get a t-shirt when you buy a t-shirt, so that doesn't count. Also, if you have to remind me what you've done when you make a request so I can tell you to bug off in a more polite manner. -Ed.]

So I guess I'm going to treat you the same way I treat NPR. If there was a gizmo they could put on my radio to stop the self-righteous "if we didn't do it, who would?" pledge drives as soon as I gave money, I guess I would give to them. Your site takes a long time to load, because of all your ads. If I could pay, say $20 and have lightning fast, ad-free access to IMAO for a year, even if it was only via a paid-subscription-only feed that gave full text, that would be worth something. But you want me to pay for the same IMAO I've always had for free? I don't think so.

So because I paid you, will you give me advice on buying a handgun? I'm gonna be 21 soon, and this is an important crossroads in my life.

[I always recommend a .45. Make sure to check out the category Frank on Guns where I answered a similar question. -Ed.]

I'm paying for IMAO already with the extra time it takes me to load all the ads. But I keep doing it! I do it for YOU, Frank! :)

[I always recommend a .45. Make sure to check out the category Frank on Guns where I answered a similar question. -Ed.]

Is a .45 easy to handle for a girl? Don't compare me to your wife; she's special. I'm new to handguns, remember.

I want something I can conceal-carry without worrying about accidentally shooting myself. I also want something that I can take to the range and shoot the crap out of targets. They don't necessarily have to be the same gun, though it would be nice.

Oh, and I shoot left-handed. Will that make things more difficult for me in finding a decent handgun?

I'm so used to rifles. Rifles make sense to me. Handguns not so much. At least I know what to request from my dad for my birthday. I'm going to the 1000 yard range this weekend; I'll ask around to get some opinions from the experts at hand.

And I did go back and read your old Frank on Guns posts. I have much to ponder now.

Say... are sycophantic co-posting minions eligible for the drawing?

As for the rest of you, think of your donation as "buying Frank J. a beer", which you would probably do if you met him in real life.

And if you buy him enough beer, he might even double-post some drunk-blogging.

http://www.imao.us/archives/002682.html

http://www.imao.us/archives/002683.html

[Employees of IMAO and there immediate family are ineligible for the Super Happy Fun IMAO Prize Package Number One. -Ed.]