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July 12, 2007
If It Is Real, My Solution Is to Wear a Lighter Jacket
Global warming is a big problem, and activists have tried solving with a rock concert and by paying other people to plant trees to no avail. Still, let's not pretend it's the biggest problem. Here are even greater threats: GREATER THREATS THAN GLOBAL WARMING * The imminent destruction of Krypton. * The possibility of Sauron getting the One Ring. * A fully-operational Death Star. * Megatron getting possession of the All-Spark. * Milo Rambaldi's discoveries falling into the wrong hands. * Khaaaaaaaaaaan!!! * The Joker escaping from Arkham Asylum. * Cobra Commander and his own personal army. * Gargamel discovering the location of Smurf Village. * Any threat that isn't completely made up. 17 Responses To "If It Is Real, My Solution Is to Wear a Lighter Jacket"
Ahhh, you humans make me laugh. Maybe I'll allow your world to survive another year. How could you forget the threat that Lord Voldemort poses to Harry potter at this most crucial (marketing) time? [I'm actually scared of that one. -Ed.] Don't forget the Irken Elite are on their way as well, if Dib doesn't keep tabs on Zim...WE'RE ALL DOOOOOOOOMED! I'm gunna sing the doom song now...doom doom, doom, doom doom, doomy doomy dooooom.... #4 - Posted by: shimauma on July 12, 2007 01:21 PMIf "Global Warming" is a pet cause for popular musicians, wasn't "Live Earth" a "pet Rock concert?" #6 - Posted by: beez on July 12, 2007 02:01 PMDon't forget V'Ger, the Borg, Q getting bored, or (for Scalzi fans) the Consu deciding that Earth needs consecration... #7 - Posted by: McBain on July 12, 2007 02:12 PMMing the Merciless destroying Earth He Who Must Not Be Named brooming his way across the pond for some "avera kedavra" fun. Vorgons putting in a new hyper-space bypass. (It's on file with the planing commission on Alfa Centuri ( or maybe not) The Dalek's, the Rhomulans, Klingons, and Baal all coming to tea, on the same day. ****There are a few things we could actually worry about. They will probably kill you if you get them. The threat of all rational 'Mericans being interned in the special secret holding facility at Denver International Airport when L. Ru Paul becomes the first 4-legged insectoid president. #10 - Posted by: Spyndrilleum on July 12, 2007 04:26 PM...and don't forget: John Kerry, Al Gore AND Hillary Clinton all voted for the war on Sleestaks before they voted against it. But that was only after evil Bush had convinced them that the giant lizards pozed a danger to Marshall, Will and Holly. #12 - Posted by: Son of Bob on July 12, 2007 05:58 PMReavers! This will only come to pass after the liberal congress puts LSD in the water The Bugs could resurface from Klendathu. Or the Zerg could take over the world. Or Big Brother could be watching us. #14 - Posted by: New Fan on July 12, 2007 10:36 PM...or what happens if we find that the Hokey Pokey really is what it's all about? #15 - Posted by: CCHEMuse on July 13, 2007 08:57 AMLargo getting his hands on the Overmind Control System. The Sta-Puft Marhmallow Man Post a comment
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