I wanted to move to Albaturkey, but feared the embarrassment of not being able to spell the name of the town I live in for Cripes sake. Love to visit there though.

Believe it or not, it's actually really cool to see who the readers are, especially when you see them commenting all the time. Nice to meet you Alan! Okay, so put my name on the list =P

I agree, Myspace sucks. But I need more people on my friends list, so I added you. Or at least requested to be added.

The story behind my name is trivial, at best. ABQ is just a freight abbreviation for Albuquerque;

So is the Holiday Inn really world famous?. Are the clouds OH so FLUFFY and does the air smell like warm root beer? TELL ME, TELL ME!!!

What wouldn't I do with them? They'd be good for yardwork, slicing pizzas, getting to the front of the line at the DMV, rounding up liberals & "guest workers", etc.

LOL!! Sounds like you have the ninjas doing stuff we Americans won't do. Especially that part about getting rid of "guest workers" and libtards. You still sound like a cool guy. If we ever get around to having that IMAO-meet up in Tempe,AZ you'll have to drive up!!!

Shimauma-
That might just work; my sister & her husband recently moved back to Goodyear, so let me know when & where! BTW, the the clouds are fluffy, and the air is reminiscent of some type of warm beer...

Emily-
Nice to meet you, too! I've left remarks on your blog in the past.

PaleoMedic & anyone else-
If you do visit, get in touch & we'll get a cup o' coffee or a beer over a game of pool!

Thanks for the write up, Frank!

Very nice, Alan! (Hey, I have a relative with that name!) I hope I can answer these questions as awesomely as you...

I love this site. I can't find a better match for my humor and thought. Here is hoping I introduce myself with questions and answers.

Excellent answers and great to see that you are enjoying yourself! You live amoung a few liberals yourself...hang in there!

I hope I'm not the only one who reads ABQ as BBQ!

I'm so glad to have so much in common with other readers. : )

Alan-
You're one of my favorite commenters here at IMAO, and given all the funny bastards who post here (not to mention Frank's demented postulations)that's intended to be a real compliment.

Alan, all this time I thought you owned a barbecue restaurant and just weren't a very good speller.

I keep reading it as BBQ, since I'm a BBQ junkie. There's a lot of readers from the southwest here.

I still see Alan-Barbeque when you post (mmmmmmmmmm...barbeque.......). Knowing your background really does help to appreciate your humor...you are the funniest Alan I don't really know.

I'm out of the loop for a little bit, and coolness returns to IMAO.

Now that I am back, the coolness is going to go. Sorry Frank, but I want to be spotlighted as well.

Anna, no, you're not. I was even told before it's ABQ and I still read it BBQ.

Show of hands, since FrankJ already did MY profile, isn't this just really getting old?
Why don't you rerun mine? That was obviously the best.

I just read "Eating Habits in the Ghetto" and I cry-laughed for about 10 minutes. Too much fun - and so wrong!

These profiles are a fun feature - keep it up.

"I'll be quirky? Albuquerque!"
-Homer Simpson

BTW, anyone else see The Simpsons Movie and notice just where it was that Scratchy was nuked? I would have thought someone would mention it on here by now...

//Alan, all this time I thought you owned a barbecue restaurant and just weren't a very good speller.//

If I did, you'd never hear from me. I wouldn't fit out the door, and then kid oakland would include me in his whiny Kos diary about potential Democrats;

"It's the fat bald guy in Albuquerque, stuffing his face with ribs, who doesn't know about moist towelettes..."

If I do open a restaurant someday, you guys named it already.

AlanABQ,
Thanks for pointing out the "Eating Habits in the Ghetto" thing. I hadn't read it, but now I have and I fee I'm a better person for it.
Ronin, I would like to stand in line for the profiles. I'm enjoying reading them a great deal.

I was the first person to call him BBQ. Ya'll are just poseurs. =+) And Alan is welcome to hoist any number of fermented libations with the AZ Ronin.

I wouldn't mind being spotlighted, but should probably be last in line after your more 'regular' fans, as I'm really more of a lurker. Besides, I'm only funny once a decade.