*The real reason Americans hate Barry Bonds is because of his hard worth ethic and cheery demeanor.

*People hate John Edwards because of his overt masculinity.

*Voters have turned against Ron Paul because he's too mainstream.

John Edwards and Fred Thompson are actually the same person.

* Harvey is the lighter side of FrankJ. Now that's funny.

* The reason why the Chicago Cubs are so hated by the rest of the country? Their string of World Series victories.

Rosie O'Donnell is just too damn smokin' hot, and it's a little intimidating for an everage joe like me.

Up is down. Black is white. Cats and dogs living together!

Personally, I take issue with McCain because of his hard-line stance against illegal immigration.

VIVA LA RAZA! YIPA! YIPA! QUESADILLA!

* Most MSM reporters are highly trained professionals who can impartially present facts untainted by their personnal views or any political agenda, are subject to (indeed, they welcome) rigorous fact checking and vetting, and would rather lose a "scoop" than be guilty of prsenting unsubstantiated rumor as fact.

* Women really do think a sense of humor is more important than looks which explains why Carrot Top's female fans outnumber Russel Crowe's by a factor of 100.

* In most cases, no, that dress does not make you look fat.

Casting Janeane Garofalo on 24 was a stroke of genius that will inject new life into the series and bring back it's viewers in droves.

Mary Katherine Ham is unattractive and I really wouldn't want to make out with her at all.

Not only is Ham unattractive but Michelle Malkin is downright ugly, inarticulate, and thinks Heraldo is just her perfect intellectual soulmate.

And Jimmy swoops in with the MM/Geraldo analogy! I was gonna do that. D'oh!

Well, it's hard to beat you, Alan. Remember the "Allah, Mo" you came up with? F R A N K ! Winner here.

Sarahk really is better than Rachel Lucas. (oooo disssssss)

...Please don't let her shoot me. Either one of them.

That basic Algebra class from 10th grade really paid off in life.

The US Congress really needs to pony up and increase taxes...a lot...we Americans could really get behind that

Chris Matthews is so damn neutral it's just so hard to figure out where he stands!

Americans hate Helen Thomas because she's just too damn easy on Republicans and that evil Tony Snow

So, Sky, what are NOT doing with your Algebra?

Conservatives hate Bill Clinton due to their jealousy of his beautiful wife and her 'model like' thighs.

That Nancy Pelosi sure is one fine-@ss bitch... and she doesn't look a day over 70. Now take Ann Coulture; is it me, or is she getting WAAAY too fat?

The reason so many Republicans seem to be rallying around Fred Thompson is that front runners like Giuliani and McCain are just too conservative.

You know...I looked at the Huffington website for the first time, and, while it has a nice appearance, it's really a big waste of time. "Cheesecake" comes to mind. It's really boring! Liberals actually read that bland, diverse junk?? Oatmeal for mush brains.

I really have no problem with it being so icy cold in the morning that I have to wear a jacket.

Frank, yer borrowing ideas from Moonbunny's Comics again?

"...but doesn't global warming have the word 'warm' in it?"
"Yeah, so it must be Opposite Day!"

"YAY! OPPOSITE DAY!!" *DANCE*

Oh...I'm pleased. I didn't really mean that in a non-non-opposite sort of way. :-(

I wish ladies like SarahK would not show so much leg leg.