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August 27, 2007
It's Time for Impeachment
Posted by Frank J. at 11:00 AM | View blog reactions | Comments (10)

Political news has been slow lately. I think it's time for impeachments.

Being impeached would make Cheney as happy as watching a puppy slowly die.
The nutroots were obsessed with Alberto Gonzales, but now that he's resigned they're probably going to focus more on President Bush and Vice President Cheney and demand impeachment for how they set fire to orphanages and eat kittens or whatever the hell it is the nutroots have imagined they've done. I think impeachment could be a lot of fun, so we need to encourage them to pressure the Democrats on this. The best way is reverse psychology. All we bloggers should post things like "Impeaching the president or vice president would be super unpatriotic!" and "We must stop the left from impeachment!" or "Don't throw the president or the vice president in the brier patch! Anything but that!"

Then the nutroots will wring their tiny little hands and squeal, "Yes! Impeachyment! We get teach righty neocons good with impeachyment! Hee hee hee!"

What will make this so much fun is that the nutroots really fear VP Cheney. See, they haven't thought this (or anything else, for that matter) through because there is no easy way to impeach a vice president (probably because our forefather never imagined people so nutty as to want to impeach a vice president). If they go after President Bush, expect Cheney to be standing on the sidelines the whole time saying, "Yes! Soon the power will be mine! Then I will kill you all! Muh ha ha ha!" It would be very distracting. And, if the Democrats were successful in removing President Bush, there would be no way they could then stop President Cheney before he used the office of the president to harshly punish all his enemies. It would be both horrific and awesome.

If they go after Cheney first, it will be even more fun. Constitutionally Cheney gets to preside over his own impeachment since the vice president gets to preside over all such matters in the Senate (the only exception is made for the impeachment of the president). That means he could rule his own trial with an iron fist!

CHENEY: You spoke out of turn, so you get handcuffed for an hour to the Chimp of Punishment!

SENATOR: But the chimp likes the bite!

CHENEY: Exactly! Muh ha ha ha!


Cheney would be able to draw the whole thing out just to torture Senate Democrats until his term naturally expired (or he and Bush form their dictatorship).

I really don't see a downside to this; it's just going to be lots and lots of entertaining news cycles. So let's start pressuring the nutroots to do this by acting like we'd really hate it.

Because I'm bored.

Rating: 2.8/5 (18 votes cast)

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