September 03, 2007
Daily Fred Thompson Fact
Fred Thompson's bank is open on Labor Day.
Fred Thompson's bank pays interest on home loans unless you are a liberal or a wide-stancer who comes in to apply, in which case you are severely punched in the face and thrown out the back door...
Freds bank failed because of his inability to decide on interest rates.
Indecision: his trademark, along with man-boobs of course.
Fred Thompson's bank is open on Labor Day? It better be...
Fred Thompson's Bank has Anti-Hippie lasers mounted on all of the ATM's.
Fred's credit cards pay HIM interest on his purchases each month.
Fred Thompsons bank keeps it's cash in a big pile of bills in the alley out back. Nobody has ever robbed Fred Thompsons bank.
Fred Thompson's bank needs, for security purposes, no guards, no impact-resistant glass, no alarms, only a sign that reads...
"Protected by Fred. Any survivors will be pursued by the FBI and local police."
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