John Edwards taught Senator Craig the "wide stance".

Once again, I must object to this innuendo being flung against John Edwards. The implication that Edwards is a homosexual has been refuted time and time again, by his wife, his many official campaign hairdressers, his masseuse, his Subaru dealer, his former canasta partner, and his official campaign choreographer.

Although Senator Edwards prefers the "three point stance".

That can't be true. John pees sitting down like the rest of the girls. Right?

But then who taught Craig how to tap dance (with a wide stance) in the stall? Certainly not Edwards - too strenuous. Is this something automatically learned in Idaho?

...tap dance with a wide stance in the ball stall...

That's catchy.

John Edward's initial reaction to the Craig story was: "I guess there's, like, nothing wrong with that but....ew!"

At least we can take refuge in the fact that in our party, at least wide-stancers are the aberration rather than one of the leading presidential nominees.

John Edwards taught Senator Craig the "wide stance".

Yeah, but Senator Craig wasn't the one who ended up in hospital for six months with torn thigh muscles and a pelvis that snapped in half.

And, of course, I mean to imply that the injuries to Silky Pony occurred due to his demonstration of the stance and as the result of any other activities. Senator Craig has some standards, after all....

...and not as the result...

(I'm so happy about my purchase of the Brooklyn Bridge, that I can't even proof-read any more....)

When Hillary takes over...there will be a series of questions asked and one of them will revolve around "butt sex between men" but it will be more subtle...be careful how you answer...answer wrong and you will be sent to a "wide stance re-education facility" to be shown the "joy" of "man-on-man-butt-sex" as only Hillary could know...

Janet Reno has always used the wide stance when she pees...standing up.

Oh, ussjimmycarter! Will the "wide stance re-education facility" stand (widely) on its own or be a part of the larger institute for democratic retraining? And will the clinic's slogan be "have your head examined while we check your butt?"

Just checking. I need to plan ahead on which weapon to have implanted up my ass.

When asked about the allegations that he "taught" Senator Craig the "wide stance", John Edwards replied, "Well, he may have picked it up in the first lesson, but had he stayed a bit longer, he would have been able to do this!" At that point, the camara clattered to the floor missing how Silky Pony dropped to the ground in a perfect split followed up by placing both legs behind his ears, all the while humming "Jimmy Crack Corn". The photographer was given a two day suspention for missing the shot while he vomited into a nearby umbrella stand.