September 07, 2007
Daily John Edwards Fabulous Fact
John Edwards's haircuts cost $400 because he has to buy enough carbon offsets to cancel out trucking in a sufficient supply of hairspray.
[collaborative hat tip: John of Johnalism]
Bonus Fact from AlanABQ:
Once long ago, a Monarch butterfly landed on John Edwards' arm & gave him such a severe sub-dermal hematoma, that for years he couldn't go frolicking through the daisies without being mortified by the sight of ANY butterfly.
Careful. The little girl might send his wife to say something to you and you can't be mean to her. She has cancer
And unto this day, with his carpel still intact, John Edwards still tiptoes thru the tulips for fear that the birds and the bees might somehow cross-pollinate him.
But while tiptoeing through the tulips, John John is on the constant lookout for fairy dust that will bless his hair with silky elegance.
"Feel the sting of the Monarch!"
Daisies can administer a pretty sever ass-whuppin on a pretty boy like John Edwards. He'd best stick with pansies.
I agree, KT. Besides, have we ever hear of a "daisy ass?" I don't think so!
Stumble It!
