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September 09, 2007
Daily Fred Thompson Fact
Posted by Frank J. at 08:00 AM | View blog reactions | Comments (14)

Fred Thompson doesn't make threats, he prophesies future occurrences of extreme violence.

Rating: 2.8/5 (8 votes cast)

Fred Thompson Facts
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14 Responses To "Daily Fred Thompson Fact"

I'm still getting that certificate error thingy. Just thought you should know. I'm using FF, by the way.

Oh, and this fact is one of the best yet.

#1 - Posted by: Abigail on September 9, 2007 09:29 AM

But do his prophesies come true?

#2 - Posted by: Jimmy on September 9, 2007 01:59 PM

High in the Tennessee mountains, a team of monks is collecting Thompson's prophecies. The leather-bound books will be titled First and Second Appalachians.

#3 - Posted by: Exurban Jon on September 9, 2007 02:56 PM

Example #1 of such prophecy-

The Book of Revelation:

"I saw heaven standing open and there before me was a white horse, whose rider is called the President of the United States. With justice he judges and makes war. His eyes are like blazing fire, and on his head are many crowns. He has a name written on him that no one knows but he himself. He is dressed in a robe dipped in blood, and his name is Fred Thompson."

(Revelation 19:11-13)

#4 - Posted by: Sir Andrew on September 9, 2007 06:03 PM

From Appalachians 1:1:1: And The Great One shall vanguish a monstrous female criminal, The Hillary, in a glorious battle of political annihilation. In it, the left wing of The Hillary and her followers shall be cast off by His Great Sword and banished to the depths of the nefarious underworld. Thusly, a new age of great enlightenment is born unto us.

#5 - Posted by: Jimmy on September 9, 2007 06:29 PM

Good one Jimmy but I thought the only way to do in Hillary was with a wooden stake...

#6 - Posted by: ussjimmycarter on September 9, 2007 07:10 PM

Uh, ussjimmycarter, say what?

#7 - Posted by: Sir Andrew on September 9, 2007 07:17 PM

ussjc - Well, Appalachians 1:1:1 has to be taken with a bit of salt. You're right: a wooden stake is the only way for that bitchass.

#8 - Posted by: Jimmy on September 9, 2007 07:21 PM

"And the mooselambs shall be laid bare upon the ground and eaten by dogs of every sort while their passive women shed their slavenly garments and declare freedom from their demented masters. And the Earth shall rejoice at every turn and the massive death of these vile cretins shall mark a new age upon the Earth."

[Appalachians 07:09:11]

#9 - Posted by: Jimmy on September 9, 2007 07:40 PM

ussjc-- Hill can be taken with a stake, but usually she is just taken with her girlfriends' stap-on.

#10 - Posted by: wsms on September 9, 2007 08:02 PM

And Fred came down from the mountain wearing bib overalls, speaking reeeeaaaaal sloooooow:

"I was a TV star and I repeated the lines written for me and people believed that I was tough."

People will believe anything if they see it on TV.

#11 - Posted by: WB on September 9, 2007 10:01 PM

The good thing about you, Warner Bros., is that you aren't very funny. And it's a good-ting-too.

#12 - Posted by: Jimmy on September 9, 2007 10:08 PM

Hey WB, I hear there's an estrogen rich pop tv series script waiting for you in your bathroom. Better go check it out and leave posting comments to the grown ups... you pu$$y.

Meanwhile, Fred Thompson, with his background in TV series, will declare in his presidency that all TV shows hence forth to have real manly men as heros, not kick boxing chicks with "issues" and prepubescent metrosexual boyfriends who fawn over them and bring them lattes.

#13 - Posted by: shimauma on September 9, 2007 10:36 PM

Now, shimauma is funny, WB. What she's hinting at is maybe you really ought to look at some Testosterone therapy. (I'm still laughing here, shimauma, thanks. I have a tendency to be "nice." You on the other hand have a veteran way of cutting to the quick!)

#14 - Posted by: Jimmy on September 9, 2007 11:22 PM
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