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September 19, 2007
Thompson Avoiding "Dumb Questions" From Blacks
Posted by Harvey at 12:00 PM | View blog reactions | Comments (21)

WASHINGTON (AP) - After being accused of racism for skipping a televised debate at a historically black college in Baltimore later this month, presidential candidate Fred Thompson explained that it was due to a combination of scheduling conflicts and the fact that "black people ask REALLY dumb questions."

Fred Thompson barely containing his disgust at being queried by "those darn Negroes".

"Every time I see a black hand go up at a college forum," said Thompson, "I just cringe because I know the guy's gonna ask something incredibly ignorant."

"For example," he continued, "I was at Alcorn State a couple weeks ago, and this colored fella pipes up with something like 'yo, man, mah ho' cain't gets no wefare, wazzup wit dat?'. Now, I ain't got the first clue of what this idiot's babbling about with all that yo-ing and ho-ing. I thought Talk Like a Pirate Day wasn't until September 19th?".

"And if it isn't dumb-ass questions, it's crap about why I don't have more black people on my campaign staff. Well, I tell ya, if I could find a black guy that would actually show up to work without a malt liquor in one hand and a crack pipe in the other, I'd hire him in heart beat."

"And before you go criticizing me for saying that," pre-empted Thompson, "let me make it clear that I'm NOT prejudiced. I wouldn't hire a black WOMAN, either. Damn annoying harpies with that wobbly neck-waggling thing they do when they say 'oh no you di-int!' and always whining about 'dey baby daddy'... I'm a busy man. Got a campaign to run. Ain't got time for mumbly, fatuous, minority bellyaching."

"Besides," concluded Thompson, "if I were going to learn a foreign language, it sure as hell wouldn't be Ebonics. It'd be something useful, like how to say 'kneel before Fred Thompson!' in Arabic."

Rating: 2.6/5 (8 votes cast)

Newsish Fakery
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21 Responses To "Thompson Avoiding "Dumb Questions" From Blacks"

HAH! Yer killin' me, matey! Hope th' dark-skinned sea-Ronin take no umbrage to yer ramblins.

#1 - Posted by: Alan "Olde Evil Eye" ABQ on September 19, 2007 12:27 PM

Ahh, another Ron Paul fan attacks teh Fred!.

#2 - Posted by: Veeshir on September 19, 2007 12:29 PM

Okay, which one is the funny fake news and which one is the real one? You f'ers have me so mixed up I don't know whether to crap my pants or go bowling.

[T]he rejections underscore the consistent absence of GOP candidates at minority voter forums.

There is a pattern here," Smiley told the Huffington Post. "When you tell every black and brown request that you get throughout the primary process that 'no, there's a scheduling problem.' That's a pattern... Are we really supposed to believe that all four of these guys couldn't make it because of scheduling?"
"It's not just that they are not coming. It's that some of them are visibly insulting us," Cecilia Munoz, vice president of NCLR, told the Politico.
"I told them I thought they were making a grave mistake and I thought they should reconsider," said Smiley.
"Unlike Univision which cancelled their debate, unlike CNN, which changed their date we are going live," said Smiley. "We are delighted the other five are coming and appreciate their courage for showing up. The beat goes on."

#3 - Posted by: badmartin on September 19, 2007 12:42 PM

Avast Matey, best be warnin' a scalliwag b'fore:
"'yo, man, mah ho' cain't gets no wefare, wazzup wit dat?'"

So's the capt'n won't be gettin' a mite suspicious cause o' the LOL comin' from the crows nest. (AKA my cube)

Seriously funny stuff!

#4 - Posted by: Piratey jeff the Sailor on September 19, 2007 12:43 PM

Maybe I can't read. I do believe Fred Thompson said those remarks. If so he couldn't be running for what?????

#5 - Posted by: on September 19, 2007 01:38 PM

Maybe I can't read. I do believe Fred Thompson said those remarks. If so he couldn't be running for what?????

#6 - Posted by: Russell on September 19, 2007 01:40 PM

Maybe I can't read. I do believe Fred Thompson said those remarks. If so he couldn't be running for what?????

#7 - Posted by: Russell on September 19, 2007 01:40 PM

It looks like Russell has a stuttering problem...

Harvey, you know to check your closet before you go to bed tonight, right? Fred is everywhere... I'd just skip sleep for a few days to avoid any "accidents"

Good Stuff!

#8 - Posted by: Amer-I-Can on September 19, 2007 01:45 PM

From reading this, I don't think Fred handled this issue very well.

#9 - Posted by: Frank J. on September 19, 2007 02:34 PM

Tell the truth, Harvey. This story was about Obama Hussein and you swapped out his name for Fred Thompson. Jessie Jackson was right!!!!

#10 - Posted by: Master Shake on September 19, 2007 02:40 PM

Damn straight, beeatch.

Now what 'bout my babies, huh, cracka?

#11 - Posted by: Shequifah on September 19, 2007 02:43 PM

badmartin, Republicans don't like lending legitimacy to any organization that practices any form of racism, even if it is just a lack of race-blindness.

#12 - Posted by: AR on September 19, 2007 03:01 PM

Avast, me Homey!

#13 - Posted by: dick on September 19, 2007 03:52 PM

That's one for the un-PC Hall of Fame, Harvey.

#14 - Posted by: Dohtimes on September 19, 2007 06:14 PM

I really like IMAO. It is funney. But, I cringe when I read anything on this site that smacks of racism or nationalism. This post sounded racist to me (or at least too close to the line for me to feel right about it). I would like to see a better sense of discretion.

CP

#15 - Posted by: CP on September 19, 2007 07:55 PM

Yeah, unlike your usual articles, it wasn't actually funny. I wonder what the Thompson campaign would think of it? They might not laugh either.

#16 - Posted by: BobbyR on September 19, 2007 08:14 PM

As an educated African American supporter of John Edwards, I'd just like to comment that....

Oops, sorry, did it again. Heh, that wasn't me either. Anybody got a frisbee?

#17 - Posted by: howlsatmoon on September 19, 2007 11:03 PM

Ahhhh Harvey

The Don Imus of IMAO.

OJ's going to go scott free once again. He doesn't have Furman to kick around this time but he can always use the "look what Harvey wrote" defense.

#18 - Posted by: Squiboda on September 20, 2007 04:06 AM

pffft.
The huff piece is a stitch, Smiley as a kingmaker.

Harvey's piece was run off and stacked in dorm rooms all over the country last night, ready for distribution on the quad before someone pointed out it was a gag.

The "real" news is funny and the fake news gets the moonbat troops in a lather.

Funny stuff makes me laugh

#19 - Posted by: badmartin on September 20, 2007 11:27 AM

Harvey, I laughed so hard that John Edwards had to escuse himself from the NOW meeting and go Freshen up.

Good one.

#20 - Posted by: WSMS on September 20, 2007 12:18 PM

Fred! has a point. Why must we, the speakers of actual English, be required to deal with these assaults upon the language?

I cite the example of a student in my class yesterday.

Idiot girl: How tall is you?

Me: It's "How tall are you?"

Idiot girl: I don' talk like that.

My brain: OK, snap! That's it! Are you all happy now?


You know,if I ever get the cybernetic eye implants I want, I'm making sure that they put in the "green crosshair" option (that I can turn on and off), if I don't go with the "Terminator red glow" style.

Maybe both?

#21 - Posted by: MegaTroopX on September 22, 2007 04:10 AM
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