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October 24, 2007
Osama Tape Transcript
Provided as a public service from IMAO, because the Lamestream Media is too chicken to do it: Hey! What's this lyin' around s@#$? You think this war's over just 'cuz Bush dropped a surge on Iraq? What? Over? Did you say 'over'? Nothing is over until we decide it is! Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor? Hell no! And it ain't over now! 'Cause when the going gets tough... the tough get going! Who's with me? Let's go! What the @#$% happened to the Al Qaeda I used to know? Where's the spirit? Where's the guts? Huh? This could be the greatest fight of our lives, but you're going to let it be the worst. "Oh, we're afraid to go with you, Osama. We might get in trouble." Well, just kiss my ass from now on! Not me! I'm not gonna take this! Bush? He's a dead man. Howard? Dead! Brown? Dead! You know I'm right. Psychotic, but absolutely right. We gotta take these bastards. Now, we could do it with conventional weapons, but that could take years and cost millions of lives. No, in this case I think we have to go all out. I think this situation absolutely requires a really futile and stupid gesture be done on somebody's part. And we're just the guys to do it. Let's do it. LET'S DO IT! Go! Go! Go! I think this speech might have worked, given this photo recently taken in Baghdad:
15 Responses To "Osama Tape Transcript"
One of the greatest monologues in movie history. #1 - Posted by: Sticky B on October 24, 2007 01:24 PMIs that Bushitler Cheney as a figurehead? #2 - Posted by: Old Geezer on October 24, 2007 01:29 PMExcellent! The next best speech would be the "Lollygaggers" rant by the manager in Bull Durham. "You lollygag your way to Baghdad. You lollygag your way out of Anbar. You know what that makes you? Moqtada?" "Lollygaggers?" "That's right, lollygaggers!" #3 - Posted by: cknight on October 24, 2007 02:15 PM*snicker* *snort* "Lamestream Media" *chuckle* #4 - Posted by: Polly Esther on October 24, 2007 02:36 PMOne of the greatest monologues in movie history. Not one of the greatest. THE greatest. The competition is strictly for second place. Truly an inspired choice, Harvey. #5 - Posted by: Silicon Valley Jim on October 24, 2007 02:46 PMBut Second place will always belong to STRIPES and the quote that Americans have been thrown out of all of the best countries in Europe. #6 - Posted by: Writer on October 24, 2007 03:06 PMOsama must be on "Double Secret Probation" that's why we can't find his dumb ass. #7 - Posted by: Clay S. on October 24, 2007 03:28 PMWriter, "Representative Start, what you've just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I've ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response was there anything that could even be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul." #8 - Posted by: FormerHostage on October 24, 2007 03:44 PM Dang it..."Representative Stark" #9 - Posted by: FormerHostage on October 24, 2007 03:45 PMI'm gonna have to agree with FormerHostage on that one. That quote is amazing. #10 - Posted by: Ernie Loco on October 24, 2007 05:00 PMMy advice to you - Get attacked by conservatives. Heavily. #11 - Posted by: will.see on October 24, 2007 06:52 PMHarvey, are there are "Florists" in Iraq? Obviously, I need to get attacked by conservatives. #12 - Posted by: Old Geezer on October 24, 2007 07:28 PMOK, I got attacked by conservatives but I still see the word "Florists" in that sign. #13 - Posted by: Old Geezer on October 24, 2007 10:34 PMYes Geezer, there are florists in Iraq, but sadly, with the slowdown in deaths, they're having trouble making ends meet. Florists depend on funerals and what with Saddam's death squads gone and the jihadis death squads in retreat (may it last), they're in serious trouble. So feel bad for the poor florists and cheer on the terrorists so they can get the florist business back on track. Oh, and the second greatest monologue is definitely from Stripes, "We're all very different people. We're not Watusi, we're not Spartans, we're Americans. With a capital "A", huh? And you know what that means? Do you? That means that our forefathers were kicked out of every decent country on the face of the Earth. We are the wretched refuse. We're the underdog. We're mutts. Post a comment
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