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November 08, 2007
Vietnamese-Americans Demand Apology for "Swiftboating" Remark
Posted by Harvey at 12:35 PM | View blog reactions | Comments (4)

AMANA, Iowa (AP) - After claiming that his wife Hillary was "swiftboated" during the recent Democratic debates, Bill Clinton was immediately inundated with complaints about his insensitivity to the Vietnamese-American population.

"Whaddya mean I don't get a purple heart for this?"

Pham Manh Cuong, founder of the Vietnamese Anti-Defamation League, explained his outrage. "Bill Clinton used 'swiftboating' to describe how his stupid cow of a wife can't give a straight answer to a simple question. The fact is, American swift boats inflicted many traumas to my people during the war. These swift boats cut off my limbs and razed my village in a manner reminiscent of Genghis Khan. How dare he make light of that!"

Presidential hopeful Barack Obama dismissed Cuong's reaction as 'hypersensitivity'. "Come on. It's an election year. I think old Fat Man Chong just needs a thicker skin. Besides, it's not like Bill said 'lynching', which would be highly offensive to my blackitude."

Although not outright apologizing, the former President did offer a clarification. "I understand the term 'swiftboating' may have been offensive to some people whose votes nobody cares about, which is a shame, really, because those guys make good fortune cookies. Anyway, I suppose I should've chosen my words more carefully. I meant to say that I thought Hillary had been 'Auschwitzed'."

Rating: 1.8/5 (2 votes cast)

Newsish Fakery
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4 Responses To "Vietnamese-Americans Demand Apology for "Swiftboating" Remark"

OMG, Harvey, you the best at news fakery. you must have a lot of time on your hands there in prison!

#1 - Posted by: aA on November 8, 2007 12:57 PM

THIS JUST IN: In an odd twist, coincidentally, all of the members of the Vietnamese Anti-Defamation League simultaneously committed suicide today, each apparently shooting himself behind the ear, then driving to a park...where they were discovered by authorities.

#2 - Posted by: Son of Bob on November 8, 2007 04:38 PM

Auschwitzed: Gased and burned. I think Dodd and Biden would have enjoyed that.

Auschwitzed...very funny, Harvey. A few more:

"Pearl Harbored"
"Nagasakied"
"Bastogned"
"Alamoed"
"Fort Sumptered"
"Waterlooed"
"Guadalcanaled"

#3 - Posted by: Jimmy on November 8, 2007 04:38 PM

that's probably what barak thought...black pain is the only pain. when someone comes out saying that someone said something offensive and they should apologize...well, if it was not directed at a black person, then it's not offensive and they should grow thicker skin.

take your own advice and if someone says the 'n' word...like oh, dog the bounty hunter, in a private conversation with his son...get over it!

;)

thank you!

#4 - Posted by: patti on November 9, 2007 01:26 PM
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