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November 29, 2007
Wonder if the Foreword Will Be by His Dog, "Splash"***?
Ted Kennedy's writing his autobiography, and he's getting more than $8 million for it. Wonder what the title will be? I speculate thusly:
* The Brother That Wasn't Worth the Cost of a Bullet * Water World * No, I'm a Drunk (Alcoholics Go To Meetings) * Taxing & Spending for Dummies * It Couldn't Be Camelot Without a Lady in the Lake * Brother Can You Spare a Liver? * If Oil Were Gin, I'd Attack Iraq * Dude, Where's My Pants? * A Bridge Too Far * King Leer * Something Wicked This Way Comes * The World According to Grope Any other ideas? ***Seriously, his dog's name is Splash. 62 Responses To "Wonder if the Foreword Will Be by His Dog, "Splash"***?"
Gin Blossoms for Algernon To Kill a Scotch 'n' Soda (I'm grasping here...this is hard...that's what she said) Undead Kennedys All the Senator's Ghost Writers #1 - Posted by: PaleoMedic on November 29, 2007 12:16 PMI don't what it will be called, but it had better be in the fiction section. Okay, maybe I do know what it will be called. Diary of a mad commie. #2 - Posted by: Veeshir on November 29, 2007 12:22 PMI'd add to this, but after "It Wouldn't Be Camelot Without the Lady in the Lake" ?? I would be wasting my time. You are made of awesome. #3 - Posted by: on November 29, 2007 12:50 PMI am not as think as you drunk I am. Making my voice heard...My choice is Dewar's How to get back into Harvard after cheating on Spanish exams. About water levels, tides, and currents of Chappaquididck. Farting and feeling a lump in my back pocket.... Fear And Loathing On The Road To Chappaquiddick. Super Size Me I Offered My Nephew A Ride Into The Water, But He Insisted On Flying #5 - Posted by: Laurence Simon on November 29, 2007 01:03 PMPrince of Tides The Sum of All Beers or There's Something about Mary Jo #7 - Posted by: Spikerules on November 29, 2007 01:07 PM10 Things to do in Denver When You're Loaded Zen and the Art of Wet Bar Maintenance Harry Potter and the Blackout from Hell Dry Martinis for the Soul It Couldn't Be Camelot Without a Lady in the Lake What could we possibly do to top that one? #9 - Posted by: AlanABQ on November 29, 2007 01:14 PMAmphibious Vehicles: Maritime Fun! By the way, the picture wins at life!c #10 - Posted by: ChrisA on November 29, 2007 01:15 PM"The Senator Who Swam with Grace from the Bay" "Scotch, Nephews, and Two Smoking Coeds" "Orca" #11 - Posted by: Alamo on November 29, 2007 01:16 PM"Skis, Planes, and Automobiles" subtitle: The Kennedy family curse of conveyance. #12 - Posted by: Alamo on November 29, 2007 01:19 PMI agree that none of us could top the Camelot one. But that won't keep me from trying... later, though. I'm supposed to be schooling now. #13 - Posted by: Hazel on November 29, 2007 01:25 PMLecher in the Rye Now that's funny. #15 - Posted by: Veeshir on November 29, 2007 01:39 PMOK, I have some sub-par ones: * Hairy Plotter and the Deathly Shallows The title may not have been chosen, but National Lampoon supplied the cover design more than thirty years ago: http://www.answers.com/topic/teddyvwad-jpg And it's "foreword", not "forward". #17 - Posted by: Silicon Valley Jim on November 29, 2007 01:45 PMNo Shame: Why Fat, Drunk and Stupid IS a way to go Through Life #18 - Posted by: Brian The Adequate on November 29, 2007 01:47 PM"Teddy doesn't do Dallas" "Son of an Irish Mobster" "Sometimes you have to drive against the tide. Or sail; I forget which." "There was once a Ted from Nantucket, who chased every skirt so he could F........." I agree, the Camelot one is pretty good. #19 - Posted by: fishlaw on November 29, 2007 01:48 PMThe Jackass in Winter The Bottle is a Harsh Mistress The Communist's Manifesto Get Lumpy Drunkenstein #21 - Posted by: duggatunn on November 29, 2007 01:59 PMA Bridge Too Far Ask not what your country can do for you - demand it A man, a plan, a canal... ooops #23 - Posted by: Mad Insomniac on November 29, 2007 02:09 PMThe Anti-Ted: Nugent's evil half Bourbon 365 Ways
Wine, Women and Song Even Barney Gumble Thinks I'm A Lush - With a forward by Norm from "Cheers" Aquaman Saved Only Me Because He's Gay #27 - Posted by: cptnmoroni on November 29, 2007 02:33 PMThe Rime of the Olds Mariner #28 - Posted by: DamnCat on November 29, 2007 02:56 PMWhat's Wrong With a Drink Before 9 AM?
One more time with feeling: The Naked and the Dead Gone With the Windmills When Bad Things Happen To Good Passengers The Unbearable Leftness of Being a Kennedy Welfare to Alms #30 - Posted by: Duggatunn on November 29, 2007 03:11 PMLet's see, how about: McFREDO "Chapter 3: Wherein Splash is revealed to be a Repeating Diver" #32 - Posted by: Ed Flinn on November 29, 2007 03:29 PM"I Ain't Drunk, I'm Just Drinking..." "The Dikes of Chappaquiddick Island" "Two Wrong Turns Make It Right" #33 - Posted by: everydayjoe on November 29, 2007 03:39 PM"Politics ends at the river's edge." Stolen from P.J. O'Roarke: "How to drive fast on drugs while getting your wing-wang squeezed and not spill your drink." "Hbbbb nbbb ga blshhhhhh: the wit and wisdom of Edward Kennedy." #34 - Posted by: on November 29, 2007 03:45 PMThe Backstroke, Bourbon, and Babes - My Life as a Leech
"Sorry About the Bitch In The Back Seat...But I'm Ok and I'm a Kennedy!" #36 - Posted by: ussjimmycarter on November 29, 2007 05:04 PMIs that a bottle of Scotch in my pants or am I just happy to see you? When it comes to the babes, Jack was a homo compared to me! I got your Barney Frank right here! #37 - Posted by: ussjimmycarter on November 29, 2007 05:06 PMLearn to swim while drunk, it just may save "your" life. How I got back into Harvard after being expelled. #38 - Posted by: Clay S. on November 29, 2007 06:02 PMI Just Do What the Voices Tell Me #39 - Posted by: Jake Ace on November 29, 2007 07:04 PMYou're Just Jealous Because the Voices Like Me Better Than You #40 - Posted by: Jake Ace on November 29, 2007 07:06 PMFat/Drunk/Stupid. Legislating the Animal House Way. #41 - Posted by: Cicero on November 29, 2007 07:08 PMA Life at the Teat. Not Worth Shooting Big Mouth, Fat Ass, Killer Life is a Threesome: Nancy, Harry and Me How I Got Away with Murder Philanderer, Boozer and Killer #45 - Posted by: katablog on November 29, 2007 08:14 PM"If I Drove a Volkswagen, I'd be President Today" (ummmm, they float.) I'm ashamed. I'll go a punch a Hippy in repentance "If I Drove a Volkswagen, I'd be President Today" (ummmm, they float.) I'm ashamed. I'll go a punch a Hippy in repentance The Goodbye Girl Ted Kennedy: God's gift to the elderly... Old Crow. Old Taylor. Anchient Age. #49 - Posted by: Robert B. on November 30, 2007 08:58 AM$8 mil for Teddy the "author"? That oughta just about cover his bar tab. My candidate will be the one who can divert that $8 mil to the US military and the GWOT (and my bank acct). #50 - Posted by: Polly Esther on November 30, 2007 11:35 AMSkip "water boarding" that guy when the book comes out. Try "2 x 4 boarding" instead. #51 - Posted by: Jimmy on November 30, 2007 05:18 PMAqua-holic #52 - Posted by: DMan on November 30, 2007 05:21 PMThe Man with the Silver Flask Poucha... While we admire you trying to get us started, should have saved the "Lady in the Lake" reference until later, we just can't top it. #55 - Posted by: sophie on November 30, 2007 06:03 PMA Blond in Every Pond Sheets to the Wind: My Senate Life with Robert Byrd Little Pink Elephants for You and Me, with foreward by John Mellancamp Mike McGwire, Sammy Sooser, and Other Baseball Legends Tilting at Windmills: A View from Cape Cod #56 - Posted by: Your Majesty on December 1, 2007 03:25 PMI'll Drive Off That Bridge When I Come To It (from a joke I heard 20 years ago) #57 - Posted by: Locomotive Breath on December 1, 2007 03:53 PM"One if by land, two if by sea." #58 - Posted by: KarenSHG on December 3, 2007 04:32 PM"If I Drove A Volkswagen, She Would Still Be Alive!" #59 - Posted by: KarenSHG on December 3, 2007 04:34 PM"Flasks Of Our Fathers" #60 - Posted by: KarenSHG on December 3, 2007 05:32 PMThe Cremation of Ted K'nedee (or, Great Natural Disasters of the Yukon Territory). Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Bars. Uncle Ted's Guide to Underwater Automotive Repair. In Golden Pond. Uncle Ted's Compound.
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