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January 30, 2008
In Hillary's Arrogant Opinion
Panicky pig in a pantsuit Hillary Clinton poured another 100 gallons of stupid into the bubbling cauldron of her campaign's retarded soundbites by floating the notion that "we should have bloggers inside government agencies so that people get real-time information about what's going on." It's bad enough bloggers have a reputation as one-hand-typing, basement-dwelling, pajama-clad ignorant windbags of hate and irresponsiblity, but now she wants to add "cronyfied government tools" to the list. Nothing - save the blithering one-thought echo-chamber of the Huffington Post - offends my sensibilities as a freelance beholdin' to no-one speechifier more than the thought of the actual existence of an official government mouthpiece biting the nipple off the blogospheric bastion of anarchy at which I daily and enthusiastically give suck. Still, since bad things DO happen to good people, the day may come when a blogger DOES get put into a government agency (which I assume is just a Clintonesque euphemism for "Super Happy Lucky Fun Re-education Camp"). Thus, I wonder aloud, "what will this dreary, Hillary-mandated outlet of 1984tastic goodspeakisms be titled?" And answer myself thusly: * PravdaPundit * Winston Smith's Daily Journal * Not Lying Because I'm Not Under Oath * Freedom! Horrible, Horrible Freedom! * I'm From the Government and I'm Here to Blog You * Ministry of Truthiness * 'Status Quo' is the New 'Change' * Should've Listened to Ron Paul! Hey! How'd THAT one get in there? * Cankling to Prosperity * Sanitized For Your Protection * Your Tax Dollars Hard at Work Instead of Squandered on the Frivilous Crap YOU Had Your Eye On And, of course, the obligatory witty tagline: "Doing the Truth Like the DMV Does Customer Service" Anyway, that's just me. What would YOUR official Happy Camp blog be called? 59 Responses To "In Hillary's Arrogant Opinion"
The new government-run, pseudo-grass-roots propaganda machine: http://1984.1984.1984 I'm waiting for ussjc's entry. He's the resident expert on Hillary's "Reeducation Camps." #1 - Posted by: Jimmy on January 30, 2008 01:12 PM*Emperor Hillary's Little Red Blog #2 - Posted by: Adam on January 30, 2008 01:12 PMFIRST! Anyway... Syocphants'R'US The Proper-gandist Puppet Parade #3 - Posted by: RedWhiteAndTrue on January 30, 2008 01:13 PMJunior Anti-Thought League... #4 - Posted by: bunkerboy on January 30, 2008 01:22 PM"Al Invented It - Now We Want It Back." The "Pay no attention to the Witch behind the curtain" Government trough happy place. The Useful Idiot Blog macht frei #8 - Posted by: spikerules on January 30, 2008 01:52 PMHarvey, You said it in the title to your post: Hillary hopes the blogosphere will give her a pass and attack Obama in hopes of becoming a member of her staff. If you are real nice to Hillary in your blogs, a high-paid position in Washington may be yours! #10 - Posted by: Dodsfall on January 30, 2008 01:59 PMHillarys Kampf.com The Emperors' Pimp.com Little Yellow Hammers and Sickles #13 - Posted by: DesertElephant on January 30, 2008 02:35 PMKYFG (kiss your freedom good bye) Prostitution Central -it's not just about sex anymore Oberman's Oversight- The gatekeeper is in the house Coffee Break - doing on line what government workers really do all day long, on your tax dollars CHAOS -almost as competent as on the Get Smart TV, but paid for by you
How about the New York Times? Or is that one already taken? Daily Kos? Can't I catch a break here? #16 - Posted by: carolynp on January 30, 2008 02:50 PMPandagon! Oh, that's right; that was a sham from start to finish. Let's see... I got it! Jenga.gov/constitutional-surgery.html FreedomOurWay.gov "ItTakesaVillageIdiot.com" #18 - Posted by: KMOG on January 30, 2008 03:05 PMWith apologies to my other favorite blog: Small Dead Brain Cells #19 - Posted by: Silicon Valley Jim on January 30, 2008 03:06 PMflogspot.gov There is already at least one government blog. It makes me sad when blogs like this one don't know the facts. Note to this blog: Please do not make me sad again or I will leave. There are plenty of other blogs to read where the bloggers actually know things. #21 - Posted by: Nate on January 30, 2008 03:39 PMnotbiasedatall.com Seriusly, wouldn't the government workers hate the fact that bloggers were getting paid more than them to do nothing more than criticize everything they do? Nothing - save the blithering one-thought echo-chamber of the Huffington Post - offends my sensibilities as a freelance beholdin' to no-one speechifier more than the thought of the actual existence of an official government mouthpiece biting the nipple off the blogospheric bastion of anarchy at which I daily and enthusiastically give suck. That there, sir, is one helluva sentence. #23 - Posted by: Peregrine John on January 30, 2008 03:46 PMBloated Bureaucracy Blog Nate = sad = leave. OK. #25 - Posted by: Jimmy on January 30, 2008 03:51 PMNate = sad = leave. OK. Because I proved without a shadow of a doubt that the blogger who wrote this post is ignorant about what is going on it politics you think I should go? All other online pundits know that there was already a government blog. It is common knowledge. The State Department blog has been around for months. You should all be very, very sad that this blogger was so uninformed. I say we give this blogger a chance to correct the post and fix his error. That's what most bloggers do when it is pointed out that they have overlooked something huge like missing the fact that there was already a political blog. #26 - Posted by: Nate on January 30, 2008 04:00 PM"Not Lying Because I'm Not Under Oath" Well, that's fucking interesting. #27 - Posted by: Jas on January 30, 2008 04:10 PMI say we give this blogger a chance to correct the post and fix his error. That's what most bloggers do when it is pointed out that they have overlooked something huge like missing the fact that there was already a political blog. Um, I'm not really sure if he was pointing out that there was never a political/government blog before. I think he was just pointing out the scary fact that Hellary may want it to be a larger entity (and possibly have more influence) than current diarrhea-of-the-mouth bloggers already do. I could be wrong. Either way, simmer down. Note: I actually did not mean to spell Hillary's name that way, but now that I have, I will leave it. Freudian slip? #28 - Posted by: MJ on January 30, 2008 04:14 PMBe very, very sad, Nate. You proved nothing. #29 - Posted by: Jimmy on January 30, 2008 04:15 PMOh come on; it's a joke, Nate. If you were coming here for up-to-the-minute news, then I believe you missed the point. Whereas this blog in particular is more accurate than, say, the NYT, that's really just a side effect of the parodies. I think we're all aware that political & gov't blogs abound. I made a joke about Amanda Marcotte's cluster f*ck of a blog for the John Edwards campaign; if you check IMAO's archives from around this time last year, you might begin to get it. Seriously, if this is really making you sad, I suggest you hit this link. #30 - Posted by: AlanABQ on January 30, 2008 04:17 PMOh come on; it's a joke, Nate. If you were coming here for up-to-the-minute news, then I believe you missed the point. Whereas this blog in particular is more accurate than, say, the NYT, that's really just a side effect of the parodies. Ok, I will try and just enjoy the humor of it. The NYT is far more accurate than this blog. The NYT is one of the greatest newspapers on the planet. They have great writers just like the Wall Street Journal. I enjoy reading these newspapers. It makes me happy to do so. #31 - Posted by: Nate on January 30, 2008 04:23 PMContinuing on with Harvey's 1984 theme: http://freedomisslavery.gov http://ignoranceisstrength.gov #32 - Posted by: Don_M on January 30, 2008 04:24 PMOK, Nate just achieved "Troll". Congrats, Nate! You're the first one ever! #33 - Posted by: AlanABQ on January 30, 2008 04:29 PMOK, Nate just achieved "Troll". Congrats, Nate! You're the first one ever! What does this mean? You think I'm a troll and the first troll here ever? That seems unlikely. Normally, I like factual blogs and blogs that are well-written. I was only trying to help by pointing out that there is already a State department blog so maybe Hillary's idea is not as unique as she thinks it is. It would be unique to have a blog for every government department. I think this would be remarkable to have 100s of government blogs. #34 - Posted by: Nate on January 30, 2008 04:37 PMHey, Frank... maybe you should listen to Nate and go back and correct anything that cannot be verified for Truthiness over the last several years.... I'll just wait here.... (snort!)
WOW. I hope you're joking. Or at least tied down so as not to do any harm to yourself or others... #36 - Posted by: MJ on January 30, 2008 04:43 PMI'm surprised that some people still don't realize that this blog is an official U.S. Government Blog, which is designated by the URL extension (.US). #37 - Posted by: Pete on January 30, 2008 04:54 PMOMG, a factual error on a .US interweb thingy! Nate, you better write to Hillary and get that straightened out right away. We really are going to nuke the moon though...it must be done. I'm surprised that some people still don't realize that this blog is an official U.S. Government Blog, which is designated by the URL extension (.US). No. .us is the Internet country code top-level domain (ccTLD) for the United States, established in 1985. Registrants of .us domains must be United States citizens, residents, or organizations, or a foreign entity with a presence in the United States. Most registrants in the country have registered for .com, .net, .org and other gTLDs, rather than .us, which has traditionally primarily been used by many state and local governments (although any entity had the option of registering a .us domain). In particular, the domains .gov and .mil have been reserved for U.S. usage. The original administrator of .us was Jon Postel of the Information Sciences Institute at the University of Southern California. He administrated .us under a sub-contract USC/ISI had from SRI International (who held the .us and the Generic top-level domains contract with the United States Department of Defense) and later Network Solutions (who held the .us and the Generic top-level domains contract with the National Science Foundation). Registrants could only register third-level domains or higher in a geographic and organizational hierarchy. The vast majority of the geographic sub-domains in .us were delegated to various private entities and .us registrants would register with the delegated administrator for the level they wished to register in, not directly with the .us administrator. However, from April 2002, second-level domains became available for registration. The .us domain is currently administered by NeuStar Inc. under a United States Department of Commerce contract. Since the official release of .us as a second-level domain, it has been adopted and developed by a number of private corporations and local citizenry. The .us country code is no longer in the exclusive realm of only governmental agencies. #39 - Posted by: Nate on January 30, 2008 06:06 PM*Whew!* Thanks for settung us straight, Nate. Hey! That rhymes! #40 - Posted by: AlanABQ on January 30, 2008 06:16 PMThanks for settung us straight, Nate. You're welcome. Hey! That rhymes! It does rhyme. I like rhymes. I think rhymes are great fun. #41 - Posted by: Nate on January 30, 2008 06:19 PMoverkill much? #42 - Posted by: Jas on January 30, 2008 06:31 PM#17: Damn, Alan, ya beat me to it. Oh, and my Jedi senses are telling me Nate's a froll. True, a person can be that much of an airhead, but even 'progressives' can't type 'ZOMG TEH NYT IZ TEH BESTEST PAPR EVAR!!1!1!one!!' with a straight face. Not a bad parody of a pot-addled moonbat, though. #43 - Posted by: Basilisk on January 30, 2008 07:27 PMWhich one, #43? If it was the "You can do it your own way..." one, I kinda have to give Metallica the credit. (From 'And Justice for All') #44 - Posted by: AlanABQ on January 30, 2008 07:39 PMJust out of curiosity, what color pajamas were you wearing when you typed that, Harvey? Nate - since you want my attention so badly, you now have it. I wrote this piece to make a point. The information in any official government blog must, like the information in any official government news outlet, be screened, controlled, and approved by the government. Such chilled speech adds nothing to the blogospheric conversation. Personally, I believe the dry, dull, sanitized content of the State Department blog illustrates my point perfectly. #46 - Posted by: Harvey on January 30, 2008 10:31 PMSon of Bob - Same color I wear to bed at night - naked. #47 - Posted by: Harvey on January 30, 2008 10:33 PMThe Arkansas Münchhausen Personally, I believe the dry, dull, sanitized content of the State Department blog illustrates my point perfectly. That's a good point. I suppose Dipnote is kind of boring. Son of Bob - Same color I wear to bed at night - naked. That's a bad idea. The bedbug problem is spreading in the United States. Some common advice in fighting bedbugs is to wear nightclothes that cover as much skin as possible. Going naked exposes much more vulnerable areas of the body to a bedbug attack. It isn't just bedbugs either. One does not really even want to think of what kind of insect might attack and where such an insect might go if you are not wearing your nightclothes. #49 - Posted by: Nate on January 30, 2008 10:52 PMOh man, Nate's posts would be the funniest thing I read all day if not for bootleg Zero no Tsukaima translations. loztrol #50 - Posted by: Effeminem on January 31, 2008 12:28 AMWho took Nate's stapler? C'mon, 'fess up, whoever did it. He's down in the basement behind that bunch of boxes that came in, and he's getin' pretty mad...he might...he might just...just wait...he's gonna...he's probably gonna... #51 - Posted by: bunkerboy on January 31, 2008 04:25 AMHAHAHAHAHA! How much do I love Office Space... he might.. um... uh.. burn down the building... lol. Nice. #52 - Posted by: MJ on January 31, 2008 08:44 AMthank you nate and harvey now i am never going to get to sleep again #53 - Posted by: on January 31, 2008 10:11 AMY'all grandma says stop feeding the trolls and they will go away. If your hear looking for "facts" please go bother the folks at Kos. They pretend everything they write is "fact". As was said previously the facts are only incidental to "hte funny". That's the point of parody, it takes a tenuous fact and squeezes it until it's funny. Me I get my news from other sources (don't be offended Frank). Before I decide to end it all, due to the stupidity and shear maliciousness of most human beings, I come here. That usually helps me to regain perspective. So I see this blog as a public service. Saving lives every day. Way to go folks. Even Hitlery can't claim that. #54 - Posted by: seanmahair on January 31, 2008 12:47 PMYeahbut, grandma, feeding trolls is fun! Besides, later, after they're good and fat, they can be slaughtered for food with their entrails fed to the Internet bit bucket. #55 - Posted by: Jimm on January 31, 2008 05:04 PM* I'm From the Government and I'm Here to Blog You Darling Harvey, would you mind if I use one of these for my forthcoming blog? (On a personal site with a .us address, no less. I think .com is kind of over for personal blogs/sites.) I'll link back here. Ah, sometimes the comments are almost as funny as the posts. #56 - Posted by: Meg Q on January 31, 2008 05:17 PMP.S. #44, I think this is where I started giggling: The NYT is one of the greatest newspapers on the planet. They have great writers just like the Wall Street Journal. I enjoy reading these newspapers. It makes me happy to do so. But he let the mask slip here: Normally, I like factual blogs and blogs that are well-written. He's parodying the humourless, pseudo-intellectual trolls who come here without the understanding that this is actually a humour/satire blog. Pretty good effort, actually. Gold star! #58 - Posted by: Basilisk on January 31, 2008 10:56 PM
freefrommarketforces.gov redcanklediaries.com (subscription based) dudeyourtaxesjustwentupsoicanblog.irs.gov dontactuallytalktothetroops.mil whitehouse.com (oh wait...) Post a comment
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