Any excuse to purchase more ammo is a good excuse.

This is an anti-zombie shotgun, Frank:

AA-12. World's deadliest shotgun

The ammo can be expensive, however.

Ya know, with so many DEAD democrats voting each election in places like Philly and Chicago, you'd think we didn't need a satellite.

Maybe this will be a plus for Hillary- legions of REAL undead to vote for her.

Ya never know...

Zombie hordes will not be a problem as soon as Billy Mays advertises an anti-zombie product that I will readily buy.

It may be a shotgun.

Who knows?

Are you sure this hasn't already happened? Just look at all of those Omama supporters! Instead of "BRRRAAAAIIIINNNNNNSSSSSSSS", they're groaning "HHHHOOOOOOOPPPPPEEEE" and "CCCCCCHHHHAAAANNNNGGGGGEEEEE".

If I learned one thing in college it was this: Always use a shotty against the undead. Always.

I recomend the new Remington 870 with folding stock and 7 shot extension.

cccccchhhhaaaaannnggggeeeee for Aa-meerrr rrriiii caaaaa

Obama supports the eating of brains.

If the pentagon wants to score some brownie points with the American people, I'd suggest they miss the target and take out Hillary!

I'm going to start with Billy Mays...both barrels!

I hope to change your fears of Zombie-Americans into hopes for change, so we can change this country to one of hope.

I say this an oppurtunity in disguise. We could try to shoot it down with a nuke and 'miss' and 'accidently' hit the moon.

All things finally come back to "Nuke the Moon". All is right with the world.

Well, one must ask oneself,

Why not shoot the moon?

Sorry off topic.

Hillarymandias

This is fabulous.

I only hope to support invading or nuking allies for change.

Is the Moon an ally? I really need to brush up on my hopes for foreign policy change....

seanmahair, are you suggesting a "Hillary's Demise" poem contest here at IMAO? Whoa, now that WOULD be fun.

How about haiku?

Hillary has lost.
True Americans rejoice!
Ding dong - witch is dead.

Haiku is too hard for Engineers. Free style.

Vogon poetry?

Oh freddled Hillary,
Thy micturations are to me
As plurdled gabbleblotchits
On a lurgid bee.
Withdraw, I implore thee, my foonting turlingdromes
And hooptiously drangle me
With crinkly bindlewurdles,
Or I will rend thee in the gobberwarts with my blurglecruncheon,
See if I don't!

Come an' listen to a story 'bout a gal named Hill
She was fixin' to be President just like Bill
Then just when it was lookin' like a lock
Along come a dark horse named Barack
Obama that is. Black and white. Hope and change.

Dude, forget shotguns, you have a katana.

If there's anything Shaun of the Dead taught us it's that for actually decapitating someone, shotguns suck.

Though maybe somebody should look for a broadsword.

Oh Hillarie, will we cry if thou should die?
Our thoughts are with thee, oh naked thigh,
but thy smile, like bird of cackle,
doth besmirch our eyes like fetid spackle.

Cackle, nay, Cankle, it is, oh host,
be thou denied your rightful post,
for ye weave instead a mighty yarn,
that makes us hope for early mourn.

Be gone we say, be out, be free,
be without us, for don't you to see?
Your's is not to question why,
yours is but to lose, and cry.

Katana!? Fffwaa! That's only 'cause the gun grabbers got all the rdinance in Britain.

Mummies & Frankesteins: Use Fire
Were-Wolves: Use Silver Bullets
Vampires: Use Stake or Decapitate
Zombies: Use Shotguns

Notice that all of the above are just variations of zombies, so shotgun works on all. Except Were-wolves. Just to be on the safe side, load silver shot/slugs.

See, shotgun is all purpose monster slayer.

Katana!? Fffwaa! That's only 'cause the gun grabbers got all the rdinance in Britain.

Mummies & Frankesteins: Use Fire
Were-Wolves: Use Silver Bullets
Vampires: Use Stake or Decapitate
Zombies: Use Shotguns

Notice that all of the above are just variations of zombies, so shotgun works on all. Except Were-wolves. Just to be on the safe side, load silver shot/slugs.

See, shotgun is all purpose monster slayer.

I will stop the nasty hazardous fuel with my trusty spritzer bottle of nitrogen tetroxide, thus saving millions from zomieism. Is that a word? I don't care.
Do hippies and hydazine mix?

Hah! And I convinced my wife earlier that I needed a SIG 556, many magazines and about 500 rounds to hold off zombies. Now, I'll tell her Frank J recommends shotguns as a close-in weapon!

Though maybe somebody should look for a broadsword.

I have one. The exact same kind of sword Arnold used in Conan. It's awesome for slicing watermelon. Slicing zombies wouldn't be any problem, either.

#19:

No fair using a computer to generate poetry.

#25:

Hydrazine + Nitrogen Tetroxide = Bad Trip.

If it falls in my yard, I'm keeping it.

Oh and Master Shake, How many delegates will Hillary lose by.....42.

So, the Navy fired a missle at the satellite with unknown results. Right during the full eclipse of the moon.

#19 Master Shake

"What you said."

Apparently we hit the satellite... at least if you believe we landed on the moon, which apparently is soon to be nuked as well...

Obama will make the hazardous fuel go away with his magic nose. If anyone makes an Other Nate on this thread there will be Hell to pay. I'm keeping track. Making a list of those who are mean to me.

Frank J,
Shotgun shells are a GREAT idea...but have you thought about claymores? There is a downside to this though. You're going to have to rent a backhoe to clear your fields of fire, those claymores sure do work good!!!

All of you poets are simply fabulous. I had no idea there was so much talent pooled here at IMAO.

Lots of clapping and cheers from me, I know I couldn't have done as well. Good job.

#28:

That wasn't computer-generated. In keeping with the Obama posts, that was outright plagiarized from The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy with only two words changed.

DAMN! The Navy actually did it! Blew the thing apart with a missile fired from a rolling ship i the nother Pacific. As a USAF vet I am lothe to admit the Squid's remarkable marksmenship.
I wanted the USAF to take it out with one of their airborne laser weapons.
At least we can point to the success to shut up the weenies crying about Space Defense systems.

I thought we could already stop ICBM's with haarp...

My late father, a Navy veteran of WWII Pacific, used to tell me all the time, "There's a right way, a wrong way and the Navy way". I think I finally get it.

Atta Boys to the millionth power.

#36

My mistake. Sorry. Someday I should read that book, as not having done so keeps me from relating to most of the people I meet.

I have met the zombies....

and they are hippies!

Both smell, both have no desire to do anything but constantly think about their one addiction.

Yes, shotguns are good for lots of things, especially zombies.