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June 09, 2008
In My World: Stranger Danger
Barack Obama was alone in the playground playing with some blocks. "Now that that mean lady is gone, I'm gonna be pesident," he said to himself. Mahmoud Ahmadinejad slowly crept near him. "Hello, little Barry." Obama waved at him enthusiastically. "Hi! I'm Barack Obama, and I've been in the Senate..." He held up three fingers. "...this many years and now I'm gonna be pesident." "I heard!" Mahmoud sat down next to him. "So what are you up to?" Obama stacked some more blocks. "I'm building a prison for all the mean people who don't want to pay for universal healthcare and own guns." "It looks nice. Anyway, I think we should go somewhere and talk." Mahmoud pointed to his van parked next the playground. Obama suddenly became cautious. "My campaign manager said I'm not supposed to talk to dictators." "That's crazy!" Mahmoud said. "I'm the democratically elected president of Iran. Shouldn't you be able to talk to a leader of a country like me." Obama was hesitant. "I dunno." "And we both want American out of Iraq... I just work towards that end more actively. Shouldn't we talk so we can better combine our energies to achieve a goal we both want." "Maybe... but my campaign manager told me..." "And I lost my puppy and need your help finding him," Mahmoud told him. "Your puppy! Oh no! Where did you lose him?" "Israel took him!" Mahmoud narrowed his eyes. "I will wipe them off the map." Obama was cautious again. "I really think I'm supposed to stay here." "But I have candy!" "Yay! Candy!" Obama screamed as he scampered off towards Mahmoud's van. * * * * "This just in: Senator Barack Obama has made a deal with Mahmoud Ahmadinejad to cut off all ties with Israel in exchange for five candy bars," the anchorman said. "I heard Ahmadinejad tried to only give him only four candy bars," the anchorwoman commented, "but Obama negotiated him up to five. He is so shrewd. I just love him so much. I want to give myself to him sexually." The anchorman nodded. "Me too. I bet he has soft hands. Anyway, John McCain, who I remind you is very old, was quick to condemn Obama's diplomacy, calling Obama a 'little whippersnapper' and told him and all his buddies to stay off his lawn." "I guess he doesn't like black people," the anchorwoman added. The anchorman nodded again. "He is a Republican." 18 Responses To "In My World: Stranger Danger"
If this weren't so close to reality, it would be funny. Well, OK, it was funny...but terrifying. #1 - Posted by: Master Shake on June 9, 2008 11:33 AMI just LOL'ed. Although I doubt BO could have gotten five candy bars out of the deal. You were being generous, you big softie. #2 - Posted by: PaleoMedic on June 9, 2008 11:36 AMReminds me of the picture of Obama as a little boy riding his trike. But, given his ties to shadey characters, it would appear he has more playground sense than his public image implies. #3 - Posted by: Jimmy on June 9, 2008 11:44 AMThat reads pretty much as straight news. It is damn near impossible to do satire anymore. #4 - Posted by: The Animal on June 9, 2008 11:45 AMI was going to post an original comment, but I've decided against it. Excellent, Frank! You nailed it again! 5 Stars! I think there are degrees of love for Obama. I truly do believe all the anchors male & female at NBC/MSNBC want him sexually, the CNNers only believe him to be slightly more important historically than Jesus Christ and CBS and NBC are somewhere in-between… #6 - Posted by: ussjimmycarter on June 9, 2008 12:03 PMIf funny was pain, I just got boiled in oil. Or something. #7 - Posted by: James on June 9, 2008 02:52 PMMy GOD, how could you? Mocking the president of the United States could be considered TREASONOUS!!He is the ANOINTED ONE. He will SMITE YOU DOWN!!(Just because he hasn't been elected yet doesn't matter. The election will be like my local school board budgets. Keep revoting the same budget until they get the result they want) Hey # 6, Does anyone else wake up at night, in a cold sweat, in fear of this man some day being president? He wants to get rid of all missile defense weapons, cut and run from Iraq, and sign a treaty with Russia, getting rid of all our nukes. The clown would leave us defenseless against the likes of Iran or North Korea. #9 - Posted by: Marvin on June 9, 2008 03:50 PMYeah, he got five candy bars, but they were probably those stupid fun-size bars, and knock-off brands to boot, like Snackers or Three Musky Tears #10 - Posted by: No One of Consequence on June 9, 2008 05:04 PMI think it's going to take me a long time to recover from this one. I'm with you #7! #11 - Posted by: Sulamie on June 9, 2008 05:34 PMYou ppl are sick on this blog....I am a lefty THANK GOD......my question to you ppl who troll these type websites and listen to, of all ppl, Rush Limbaugh.....WHAT IS IT THAT YOU PPL ARE SO AFRAID OF? Skin color does not rub off on you....We have had White Pres. since this Ctry began and look at the shape we are in....the founding fathers would be ashamed....and what is really scary, is that by reading these comments you ppl actually beleive this garbage......I am so blessed that I am enlightend....I hope one day that you will wake up too!! God Bless!! [IMAO READER CHALLENGE: I don't know why there are ellipsis in his comment, but why don't you ppl all try to fill in whatever it was he was skipping over. -Ed.] #12 - Posted by: BUZZARD'S KORNER on June 9, 2008 08:58 PMEd. I'm guessing it's all the vowels that didn't make it into the words. ie: You ppl are sick on this blog eoe. or maybe just eieio, insert as needed. Second Maggie's statement. Maybe someone should turn that post into a version of "Ole MacDonald" or another song. #14 - Posted by: RobDob on June 10, 2008 11:35 AMYou ppl are sick on this blog sick from the government-created AIDS virus! I am a lefty THANK GOD who I don't believe in!! my question to you ppl who troll these type websites and listen to, of all ppl, Rush Limbaugh, who will soon be overtaken by Air America, WHAT IS IT THAT YOU PPL ARE SO AFRAID OF? Skin color does not rub off on you like capitalism does!We have had White Pres. since this Ctry began and look at the shape we are in, the world's only superpower. The founding fathers would be ashamed of me. And what is really scary, is that by reading these comments you ppl actually beleive this garbage of "liberty" and "free trade." I am so blessed that I am enlightend enough to know how the Obama/Kucinich ticket is our only hope to get Iran, Venezuela, and North Korea to like us again!! I hope one day that you will wake up too!! God Bless!! #15 - Posted by: Mudley on June 10, 2008 01:54 PM...duh...um...er...so...like...I mean...you know...right?...(insert as required). #16 - Posted by: 5 of 7 on June 10, 2008 08:30 PMThe closing lines made me think of the book The Turner Diaries.(shudder) Did anybody else catch that? #17 - Posted by: JackG on June 10, 2008 11:45 PMOne more thing, post #12, I read it a couple of times. It really does not say anything. When he asked what are you affraid of? he sounds like a drug dealer selling to first timers. #18 - Posted by: JackG on June 10, 2008 11:53 PMPost a comment
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